i'm so tired
of hurting people
i'm so tired
of hurting myself
i'm so tired
of my own thoughts
i'm so tired
of myself
i'm so tired
of others
i'm so tired
of missing someone who doesn't think about me
i'm so tired
of my family
i'm so tired
of school
i'm so tired
of winter
i'm so tired
of sitting in my room
i'm so tired
of having no energy
i'm so tired
of being alone
i'm so tired
of eating
i'm so tired
of looking at myself
i'm so tired
of my body
i'm so tired
of taking care of myself
i'm so tired
of waiting for a sign
i'm so tired
of living
Dec 29, 2024
Dec 29, 2024 at 11:33 PM UTC
i think i was supposed to be a bird
the way i hate winter
and the cold weather always seems to get to me
i would love to migrate somewhere warmer
somewhere my seasonal depression would never eat at me
i think i was supposed to be a bird
the way i always flee from things
and leave things that are good for me
i would love to be able to run away from my problems
run away from people that love me and never look back
i think i was supposed to be a bird
the way i long for family
and raising kids
i would love to make a family that is better than the one i grew up in
to make a home full of love
i think i was supposed to be a bird
the way i wish i was a part of a flock
and have people to count on
i would love to have a group that always gets along
always there for each other
i wish i was bird
Dec 21, 2024
Dec 21, 2024 at 12:39 AM UTC
i wrote you a letter
right before winter break
i swear i planned on giving it to you
but then you weren't there
maybe i'll give it to you
maybe on your birthday
or maybe on the last day of school
possibly when we graduate
or i might find you when we're older and email it to you
or maybe i won't
maybe i'll let it sit in my nightstand dresser
and i'll probably rewrite it a million times
it'll always be in my bag waiting for you
and when i move out i'll throw it in a box
maybe when i'm married i'll find it and finally throw it away
Dec 19, 2024
Dec 19, 2024 at 11:16 PM UTC
i want to write
i want to fill this empty page with brilliant words
i want to blow people away with my witty metaphors and symbolism
but i cant seem to get it out
trust me I have so much to say
too many thoughts
too many unfinished poems
just sitting,
unpolished,
unperfect,
unacceptable,
it's either too wordy or not wordy enough,
too meticulous or not meticulous enough,
doesn't rhyme at all or doesn't rhyme the way i want it to
i want to be good like all the others i see on here
but i just cant seem to measure up
Dec 16, 2024
Dec 16, 2024 at 10:38 PM UTC
sometimes i miss you
and then i can't think why
i remember the way we'd always fight
and how much i'd always cry
i remind myself of your arrogance
and how stupid i'd feel around you
i think of your stubbornness
and how it'd put me in a bad mood
your weird ******* fashion
and no common sense
it all left me
so so tense
but of course i can't bring myself to think of all the good
like how you'd smile when i'd talk
and remember all my small things
when you'd always bring me food
and hold my hand when we'd walk
i don't dare think of your sweet letters
or the loving look you reserved for me
your soft lips
or your hugs that'd immediately make me feel better
maybe i can think of some reasons to miss you
but i don't want to think about that
cause you'd say you'd always love me
but i guess that's not true
Dec 2, 2024
Dec 2, 2024 at 11:32 PM UTC
what do you see while you're building a completely new future
with no trace of me
with her?
do you see lazy college days
and dancing late at night?
do you see a new apartment
and 2 golden retrievers?
do you see proposing in a park
and crying at your wedding?
do you see buying a house
and having children?
do you see parenting
and traveling?
do you see peace
and growing old together?
do you see me
standing in the corner
watching you live the future
that you pinky promised me?
Nov 30, 2024
Nov 30, 2024 at 2:27 AM UTC
i look at you and i see nothing
i don't see the person i would've last year
i don't see the hands
that held mine to let me know you loved me even when you couldn't say it
i don't see the eyes
i once said were my favorite color
i don't see the lips
used to speak the sweetest words and light a fire in me
i don't see the arms
that once held me to keep me safe and warm
i don't see the person
that was mine
you are a stranger
and while i thought it would never happen
maybe it is for the better
Nov 30, 2024
Nov 30, 2024 at 2:19 AM UTC
they ask me what makes me think of you
and i can't really say because
rain makes me miss you
and books do too
i miss you when i'm writing
and when i'm crying
benson boone
dark blue
the shining moon
all make me think of you
reading gives me that feeling
and so does that sweater
so i guess there's no healing
guess you're stuck with me forever
Nov 30, 2024
Nov 30, 2024 at 2:11 AM UTC
i've never really felt my age
so sometimes its hard for me to act it
at 7 i felt 30
having to take care of my mom
her two other kids
her ****** apartment
her own problems
i didn't go to sleepovers or birthday parties
i didn't play with chalk or jump rope
i was scared
at 10 i felt 5
having to relearn my family
new nice house
new strict parents
new hated rules
i didn't have my mom or my siblings
i didn't have to yell or fight to be heard
i was shocked
at 13 i felt 20
having to become a teenager
fun fake friends
fun new phone
fun first heartbreak
i didn't stay at home or deny friends
i didn't focus on school or myself
i was naive
at 15 i feel 9
having to learn i know nothing
big scary job
big new state tests
big unknown car
i don't eat or sleep much
i don't waste time or effort
i am anxious
i know it will only get worse form here
Nov 30, 2024
Nov 30, 2024 at 2:03 AM UTC
maybe i'll mail the relationship back to you
because now that i'm left with the memories
i realize it's too much for me to keep
so instead of letting us collect dust
in the depths of my closet
or hidden under my bed
i'll find a box wrapped in pink gift wrap
pull us out of my heart and mind
carefully place us with tissue paper and slap on a fragile warning
i'll write your name and address on the top
in my handwriting that you memorized
and just because i'm selfish
i will douse it in my perfume and seal it with a kiss
i send with love and care
it should be there by tuesday
i hope it finds you as well as found me
best wishes, amelie
Nov 30, 2024
Nov 30, 2024 at 1:38 AM UTC