Bleached out hair and sunken-in eyes.
Bracing for yet another goodbye.
Being promised not to be used
yet you'd rather be abused.
Dreaming of one day wearing a white dress-
knowing the reality of your life being a mess.
Turning twenty-one is not that fun
when all you want is to be one with your daddy tying your hair in a bun.
Memories that don't seem real -
the only tangible things that make you feel.
Full face of makeup and dressed to the nines -
the only thing I can control and call mine.
A soft kiss-
something I'll let myself miss.
Bleached out hair and sunken-in eyes,
bracing for yet another goodbye.
Aug 18, 2015
Aug 18, 2015 at 10:17 PM UTC
Heart
is
empty.
With a soul mate I still find the absence of you , haunting.
Living seventeen years without you.
I'm worn thin,
like paper.
You've crumpled my trust and ripped out my expectations of a man.
Yet, why do I still call you daddy?
Oct 1, 2012
Oct 1, 2012 at 9:15 PM UTC
Shy.
I've always been shy,
hiding, never making myself too known.
You,
you noticed me.
You,
approached me out of the clear starry night.
I laughed,
I haven't laughed so genuine like I did that night in a long time.
You and I,
we fell in love.
Fast and hard.
I love you today,
tomorrow,
and the all the days that follow.
Each star that was out that night,
shining oh so bright,
I thank them,
for you.
Jul 31, 2012
Jul 31, 2012 at 11:58 PM UTC
Being negative is a flaw.
Realizing you need to change it is,
flawless.
How do you portray an image of beauty
through a blank skeleton
of nothing?
Humas are beautiful.
So why do we all feel the need to judge
those who are innocent and cannot change
their looks or who they are.
I'm tired of the useless chatter,
and more concerned with the things that matter.
Life goes so fast and you must see
how far you've come
to see where you're going.
But, then the thought of going so far
for it all to come to an end.
But that's the thing called a journey my friend.
We don't have all the answers so why pretend to?
Learning to live in question
leads to more journeys and knowledge.
Accepting the rough times,
makes enjoyable times shine.
There's no need to question
or for a hidden message.
I just want to love and be loved.
Realizing negativity and faults all amount to nothing,
So why sulk when I can actually be something.
Jul 31, 2012
Jul 31, 2012 at 11:52 PM UTC
You're beautiful, you're pure.
You radiate warmth and love
with every chromosome in your body.
Every breath you take makes each day,
sweeter.
Life is fragile,
please be grateful.
Loving mother, never forget,
the love from your own daughter.
Jul 7, 2012
Jul 7, 2012 at 9:58 AM UTC
Nothing weighing me down but thin loose clothing.
The feeling of suffocation engulfs my bedroom,
don't touch me, or I'll scream.
I'll sleep naked,
and freely dream.
Jun 22, 2012
Jun 22, 2012 at 12:27 PM UTC
I'm shouting just to shout,
or I think I'm shouting for you to hear me.
I want to be loved but I don't want to force it,
I don't want to pry like a banker doing an audit.
I, I, I, am stuttering,
stuttering because no words seem right.
And you, you, you, are someone I can't fight.
I don't want to pressure so I'll just write it in a letter.
Maybe if I hide I'll feel so much better,
but I found my walls talking, and they are always bitter.
I should hide for now and try again later,
I can, I can test the water and try not to falter.
My words come out wrong,
I talk too long,
I yell out of frustration,
and, and, and push you away in fear of inflation.
I will try and work things out,
I can't say I won't shout,
and I will pout,
but, but, but, baby I can't find the right route.
Jun 21, 2012
Jun 21, 2012 at 4:53 PM UTC
I look at you everyday with judgement,
with admiration,
with hatred,
and with disgust.
I hate how you look so good one day,
and then the next,
a huge mess.
Your complexion is porcelain,
your legs,
are fat.
Your eyes,
they resemble the sea.
Keep doing that,
your ribs will show so much, they might snap.
**** you reflection you haunt my exsistence,
you're my best friend but reflect my worst nightmare.
Pinch the fat and push the food away,
keep doing that your skin will be ruined.
Don't love yourself you'll stop making progress.
I don't want war, but what do I want.
Jun 18, 2012
Jun 18, 2012 at 10:29 PM UTC
Break it all up, small and dense,
inhale and hold, and baby I'll cross that fence.
Let me get a little high and I'll open up,
I've always been told to scream my problems into a tea cup.
I tell myself I won't be like you,
but the way I feel when I'm gone feels true.
Four hits and that's not enough,
I don't know why everything is so tough.
I love the way I can be so vibrant,
when really I'm always on a tyrant.
I want to feel the tension of smoke,
that's the only way I don't choke.
I can tell you how I feel,
just let me get real.
This isn't frustation,
it's really just temptation.
Jun 18, 2012
Jun 18, 2012 at 9:54 PM UTC
Two thousand and ten,
that's when I noticed my heart beat for you.
Two thousand and ten,
I thought I was crazy to even look at you.
I've been here for you,
I've cried with you,
I've admitted I wanted to die to you.
I've also left you passed out drunk of the floor, just so I wouldn't kiss you.
Two thousand and eleven,
suicide strikes and you disappear.
It's hard on me too,
I'm always here for you.
Let me cry with you,
I always say how I'd rescue you.
Two thousand and twelve,
I admit my love for you,
you love me too?
I'm not a real girl to you.
You said you always wanted to know,
so go, kiss me.
You made my heart skip a beat.
You make me nervous,
you make me look twice after we kiss.
Your beard scratched my neck,
you make my eyes roll back,
with a simple press of your perfect lips.
And, those finger tips,
tracing me, learning me, finally touching me.
Two thousand and twelve,
if you leave now I have no where to go.
I'm starting to feel low,
nothing that good could be so wrong.
Maybe some clarity will bring us to where we belong.
Jun 14, 2012
Jun 14, 2012 at 6:05 PM UTC