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aislinnmiell
23/F
𝑫𝒐𝒏’𝒕 π’‡π’Šπ’π’… 𝒂 π’˜π’‚π’š 𝒕𝒐 π’ˆπ’†π’• π’Šπ’ 𝑲𝒆𝒆𝒑 π’šπ’π’–π’“ π’…π’Šπ’”π’•π’‚π’π’„π’† π‘°β€™π’Ž 𝒂 𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒇 𝒄𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒓𝒆𝒅 π’Žπ’Šπ’π’π’†π’π’π’Šπ’‚π’ 𝑾𝒉𝒐’𝒔 𝒔𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒆𝒅 𝒐𝒇 π’„π’π’Žπ’Žπ’Šπ’•π’Žπ’†π’π’• 𝑩𝒖𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒓𝒖𝒕𝒉 π’Šπ’” 𝑰’𝒅 𝒓𝒂𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒃𝒆 𝒂𝒍𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒏 π’Žπ’Šπ’”π’•π’‚π’Œπ’† 𝒂 π’‡π’†π’†π’π’Šπ’π’ˆ 𝑭𝒂𝒄𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒅 π’ƒπ’š 𝒂 π’˜π’π’“π’… 𝑰 𝒅𝒐𝒏’𝒕 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒏 π’Œπ’π’π’˜ 𝒕𝒉𝒆 π’Žπ’†π’‚π’π’Šπ’π’ˆ 𝑩𝒖𝒕 π’šπ’π’–β€™π’“π’† 𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 π‘°β€™π’Ž π’†π’™π’Šπ’”π’•π’Šπ’π’ˆ 𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝑰 𝒏𝒆𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍 𝒏𝒆𝒆𝒅𝒆𝒅 π‘Ύπ’π’“π’“π’Šπ’†π’… 𝑰’𝒅 𝒃𝒆 π’‡π’π’“π’ˆπ’π’•π’•π’†π’ 𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒑𝒖𝒍𝒍𝒆𝒅 π’Žπ’† 𝒕𝒐 𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒉 π‘Ύπ’Šπ’•π’‰ π’šπ’π’–π’“ 𝒔𝒐𝒇𝒕 π’”π’‘π’π’Œπ’†π’ π’˜π’π’“π’…π’” 𝒀𝒐𝒖 π’ˆπ’‚π’—π’† π’Žπ’† 𝒂 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒐𝒏 𝑻𝒐 π’˜π’‚π’Œπ’† 𝒖𝒑 π’Šπ’ 𝒕𝒉𝒆 π’Žπ’π’“π’π’Šπ’π’ˆ 𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒄𝒐𝒍𝒍𝒆𝒄𝒕 𝒂𝒍𝒍 π’Žπ’š π’‘π’Šπ’†π’„π’†π’” 𝑱𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒅𝒐𝒏’𝒕 π’•π’“π’š 𝒕𝒐 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 π’Žπ’† π‘΄π’š 𝒔𝒐𝒖𝒍 𝒄𝒂𝒏’𝒕 𝒃𝒆 𝒑𝒐𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒅 π‘»π’†π’“π’“π’Šπ’‡π’Šπ’†π’… 𝒐𝒇 π’Žπ’š π’“π’†π’‡π’π’†π’„π’•π’Šπ’π’ 𝑰 π’Œπ’π’π’˜ π‘°β€™π’Ž 𝒂 π’Žπ’†π’”π’” 𝑩𝒖𝒕 𝒑𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒆 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒑𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒆 π‘­π’π’“π’ˆπ’Šπ’—π’† π’Žπ’† π’šπ’π’–π’“ 𝒃𝒆𝒔𝒕 π‘»π’‰π’Šπ’” π’Šπ’” 𝒕𝒉𝒆 π’Žπ’π’”π’• 𝒉𝒐𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒕 π’•π’‰π’Šπ’π’ˆ 𝑰’𝒗𝒆 π’˜π’“π’Šπ’•π’•π’†π’ π’šπ’†π’•
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Nov 7, 2020
Nov 7, 2020 at 8:45 AM UTC
RESTLESS
𝑫𝒐𝒏’𝒕 π’‡π’Šπ’π’… 𝒂 π’˜π’‚π’š 𝒕𝒐 π’ˆπ’†π’• π’Šπ’ 𝑲𝒆𝒆𝒑 π’šπ’π’–π’“ π’…π’Šπ’”π’•π’‚π’π’„π’† π‘°β€™π’Ž 𝒂 𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒇 𝒄𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒓𝒆𝒅 π’Žπ’Šπ’π’π’†π’π’π’Šπ’‚π’ 𝑾𝒉𝒐’𝒔 𝒔𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒆𝒅 𝒐𝒇 π’„π’π’Žπ’Žπ’Šπ’•π’Žπ’†π’π’• 𝑩𝒖𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒓𝒖𝒕𝒉 π’Šπ’” 𝑰’𝒅 𝒓𝒂𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒃𝒆 𝒂𝒍𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒏 π’Žπ’Šπ’”π’•π’‚π’Œπ’† 𝒂 π’‡π’†π’†π’π’Šπ’π’ˆ 𝑭𝒂𝒄𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒅 π’ƒπ’š 𝒂 π’˜π’π’“π’… 𝑰 𝒅𝒐𝒏’𝒕 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒏 π’Œπ’π’π’˜ 𝒕𝒉𝒆 π’Žπ’†π’‚π’π’Šπ’π’ˆ 𝑩𝒖𝒕 π’šπ’π’–β€™π’“π’† 𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 π‘°β€™π’Ž π’†π’™π’Šπ’”π’•π’Šπ’π’ˆ 𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝑰 𝒏𝒆𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍 𝒏𝒆𝒆𝒅𝒆𝒅 π‘Ύπ’π’“π’“π’Šπ’†π’… 𝑰’𝒅 𝒃𝒆 π’‡π’π’“π’ˆπ’π’•π’•π’†π’ 𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒑𝒖𝒍𝒍𝒆𝒅 π’Žπ’† 𝒕𝒐 𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒉 π‘Ύπ’Šπ’•π’‰ π’šπ’π’–π’“ 𝒔𝒐𝒇𝒕 π’”π’‘π’π’Œπ’†π’ π’˜π’π’“π’…π’” 𝒀𝒐𝒖 π’ˆπ’‚π’—π’† π’Žπ’† 𝒂 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒐𝒏 𝑻𝒐 π’˜π’‚π’Œπ’† 𝒖𝒑 π’Šπ’ 𝒕𝒉𝒆 π’Žπ’π’“π’π’Šπ’π’ˆ 𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒄𝒐𝒍𝒍𝒆𝒄𝒕 𝒂𝒍𝒍 π’Žπ’š π’‘π’Šπ’†π’„π’†π’” 𝑱𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒅𝒐𝒏’𝒕 π’•π’“π’š 𝒕𝒐 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 π’Žπ’† π‘΄π’š 𝒔𝒐𝒖𝒍 𝒄𝒂𝒏’𝒕 𝒃𝒆 𝒑𝒐𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒅 π‘»π’†π’“π’“π’Šπ’‡π’Šπ’†π’… 𝒐𝒇 π’Žπ’š π’“π’†π’‡π’π’†π’„π’•π’Šπ’π’ 𝑰 π’Œπ’π’π’˜ π‘°β€™π’Ž 𝒂 π’Žπ’†π’”π’” 𝑩𝒖𝒕 𝒑𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒆 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒑𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒆 π‘­π’π’“π’ˆπ’Šπ’—π’† π’Žπ’† π’šπ’π’–π’“ 𝒃𝒆𝒔𝒕 π‘»π’‰π’Šπ’” π’Šπ’” 𝒕𝒉𝒆 π’Žπ’π’”π’• 𝒉𝒐𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒕 π’•π’‰π’Šπ’π’ˆ 𝑰’𝒗𝒆 π’˜π’“π’Šπ’•π’•π’†π’ π’šπ’†π’•
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I’m merely a wallflower Deprived of sunlight Breathing the same air In the same room longing to belong somewhere Anywhere but here What’s the point in pulling me from my roots When they’re buried too deep And are far too frail For only I can aid my bloom You told me to get some rest I promised you. But I can’t sleep whilst I'm afraid to exist Dreams just give me false hope But please don't let me sit through this winter alone And at the end of the night As you held the weight of my body You asked me, Is it repetitive? How you live? And you watched as the timid flower shrived in your hands
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Apr 30, 2020
Apr 30, 2020 at 12:17 PM UTC
It’s Friday, may 1st And I’m fading
That time in winter wasn’t a lie. Perhaps just a feeling I got. I thought it was the short days dragging me down But as the season changed, we stayed the same. And as the air got colder, you asked me why I was too.
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Dec 30, 2019
Dec 30, 2019 at 10:05 AM UTC
That Time in Winter
I’m as weak as I am young, I feel my skin under the sun. I’m wasted and loosing time I want love but I’m not fine. I spend my days with little time to think faΓ§ade feelings with distractions when I thought the feelings were fading. But its been about a month And I’ve been sleeping badly Still feel numb, But I wrote a poem. It was a list of all the things we’ve never spoken of. You know, people often say they regret the things they didn’t do. And I regret jumping before the boat sank.
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Dec 30, 2019
Dec 30, 2019 at 9:45 AM UTC
Mundane
At the break of dawn, the world has never seemed more peaceful. After the bleak winter night has silenced, the soft breeze fills the cold morning air with the unrefined scent of new life. The fresh snowfall settles like a white blanket over the hazy alpine. As the warmth of the winter sun begins to cover our skin, I lay hoping we can stay like this forever, we are so perfect as we are right now. So, I lay as still as I can, pretending as if the rays have melted the world away from beneath us. Afraid that if I shut my eyes, even for one second, you would disappear. Because I know this bittersweet moment can’t last forever, the true nature of winter will reveal itself and the frost will secrete your heart. I know I can’t have you or expect too much from you, but under the golden painted sky of this dreamlike winter morning... let’s just stay like this for a while.
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Mar 6, 2019
Mar 6, 2019 at 8:31 PM UTC
You will always remind me of winter.
I didn’t need you to be the one to tell me that I will β€˜find someone new’. I know I was never very good at showing my intentions. But then again, neither were you. I just wish I could shut my eyes and things would be like they used to. But when my eyes are shut the dark space is flooded with memories of you. however... it’s a vision that always seems to stray. The fleeting kind; A reminder that I could never make you stay. That perhaps, this feeling deep in my bones Telling me to trust no one, Was so I don’t have to feel the pain of constantly being left alone. But I guess you didn’t have a clue. Because I still sit here wondering, If there is a point in finding someone new when I never really wanted anyone but you?
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Feb 6, 2019
Feb 6, 2019 at 8:13 AM UTC
Trust me, I looked.
As I lay in a forest that used to appear in my nightmares, I stare up into the stars wondering if there is life after death... Because understanding life is equally as complicated asΒ understanding your mind. I’m just afraid that maybe it will show me that my doubts are much deeper than I thought. And if I slipped and fell into that hole, would I have to spend another eternity waking up alone? Maybe that’s why this forest no longer scares me; because at least when I am here I can tell myself I have something to go back to. With each step taking me further from home, I place my faith in the wind hoping it will carry me into the warm embrace of your arms. But I know that's not how gravity works... Thus I continue to chase the shadow cast from behind, because chasing dreams is too overrated. So please don't ask me if I am doing more with my life other than sitting at home writing poems of my watered down angst. As I spend my nights walking this forest, I can't help but wonder how you have been? if anything you told me was true? And in the blistering cold of the night I opened my soul to you. and you said β€˜okay’
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Dec 20, 2018
Dec 20, 2018 at 3:32 AM UTC
I said I love you, and you said okay.
Memories dampened in nostalgia form a constellation in my bedroom. The stale air is muted with the perfect harmony of longing and angst. Perhaps this is just my insomnia giving me a reason to stay awake.
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Oct 4, 2018
Oct 4, 2018 at 2:57 AM UTC
A Scene I know Too Well
Despite intention, I allow thoughts to hold more power than actions. Maybe this is why I’m find myself scribbling words of watered-down heartache...
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Oct 4, 2018
Oct 4, 2018 at 2:39 AM UTC
Would things be the same as they are?
You know, I read our conversations so much it feels like you were still here. A sequence of muted meanings that holds my weighted body from falling into something much larger than me. But that something is a square ocean that lay between us reminding me that the waves I send can’t quite reach your shore. I’m just surrounded by a digital sea that makes me wonder how reflections in water could be so fake. But maybe if I had just poured my soul into the current and let it reach you, this artificial light wouldn’t make me feel so ******* alone.
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Aug 21, 2018
Aug 21, 2018 at 2:06 AM UTC
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