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aghostwrites
aghostwrites
19/Transmasculine/Oakham, Rutland, UK casper, 19, finding solace
it's something only felt in bones scraped up shards split open by three days' grace and forty four days' solitude when i'm picking up pieces of my soul shoving them into canvas hastily snapping twigs to build a new nest for the winter i feel like a hawk on the edge of a cliff. i could do it, you know and i tell you that every time i could fly if my wings weren't clipped freshly broken-tipped slicked with oil, with dirt and the wrong kind of paint and i'd fall not like i did before but fifty thousand feet above the ground. a mid-air pirouette trapeze artist over train tracks salt-stained acrobat swinging from the power lines where the safety net was torn in the storm but oh, for ten seconds of freedom who cares about hitting rock bottom?
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Aug 6, 2018
Aug 6, 2018 at 2:23 PM UTC
cacoethes
between the head and heart, you must reside and carry on, regardless of the weight - i hope you never see your worlds collide if you can fight the emptiness inside the battle's almost won, so close the gate; between the head and heart, you must reside it's tempting, yes, but you will be denied from understanding, only left to hate i hope you never see your worlds collide discard the hunger, balance out the tide you'll learn that dying lies in taking bait between the head and heart, you must reside and in you now, i know i must confide there's so much strength in keeping in this state i hope you never see your worlds collide your twin-set mind, a natural divide but you were always destined to create between the head and heart, you must reside; i hope you never see your worlds collide.
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Jun 25, 2018
Jun 25, 2018 at 6:33 AM UTC
strength
and when there's nothing left don't forget me but don't remember me wrong i am buried under your idea of security in separate rooms, where the only sounds are the summer fan and the laptop keys, not the keys that made me flinch when i heard them in the door i am buried under your idea of forever location dictated by your success, which apparently, i lack so much of when you tell me all about the things i should have done (which wouldn't have changed your mind anyway) i am buried under your idea of home where the holes were filled two years ago and the sound i heard the thud, thud, thud against the drywall was the beating of our hearts when we make it through another one and another one, and i'm buried in the pillow and it's the duvet, not your hands (even though i still feel them all over) and they hurt, and your lips taste like rotten fruit and guilt and shame and no amount of scrubbing will let me forget you and when there's everything left i'll remember you right where i found you, and where you will stay in a cold glass box, all locked up sound familiar?
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Jun 23, 2018
Jun 23, 2018 at 2:06 PM UTC
pressure
right now, i am a glockenspiel drunken tin can symphonies bells on broken pavements, cracks where lullabies sink beneath the waves right now, i am a myth the bringer of the end, whereby i flood the minds of a writer who describes the way i love her to the death right now, i am the full blood moon aligned to fit your path, alone but cross’d the broken heart and hope to die, among the living spoken still there is light, you know. yet i remove it, force a halo - rip the life-lines clean from veins of liquid gold
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Jun 22, 2018
Jun 22, 2018 at 6:50 AM UTC
eclipse
at times, i wish my eyes had only seen horizon's haze of darkened clouds instead ignored the sirens calling so serene and burnt the bridge that carried off the dead but i did not, and borne from what we hate come roses blooming, bloodstains on the dirt in time, they reach the same destructive fate and we, the lowly seekers, reach the hurt the heart we wear upon our sleeves is broke with every tear, the stitches hold less deep as time moves on, we try to quell the smoke of fire raging just before we sleep at times, i think we're better off as friends but god, i hope the tempest never ends
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Jun 15, 2018
Jun 15, 2018 at 9:25 AM UTC
a sonnet for sunken ships (and all the bridges that burn)