a-love-for-hatred - Hello Poetry

I'll attach my soul to yours whether you want it or not We'll be soulmates in this life and beyond My love is such a bitter seed It festers and spoils itself into a toxic **** If you could want me an eighth as much as I want you I'll be content The time of sunshine and rainbows Came and went Happiness is for winners I'm just a ***** sinner A hopeless dream Undone at the seams But I'll stitch you to my blackened heart I'll always be unclean You know you love the way I scream And babe we'll be forever Our tie can't ever be severed No not even death could cut us apart It's cold inside my soul Empty hollow mess It rained in my head And snowed inside my chest But my heart still beats An icy drum As your fingers linger idly On my aching skin I want you so bad it hurts You say you love me The lie seeps in Destruction and decay All that's left for me to give Daring you to stay Hoping that you live There were so many before you I hope that you'll be my last They all ran from my crazy But they kept coming back There's just something about me That makes them all wanna stay and leave I'll make you feel real good but then I'll make you feel real bad Here's a warning When I beg you not to go You'd better not listen to me I'm the harlot in that story You know the good book don't tell lies I am what it says that I am And I've lived so many lives Jezebel they call me A murderess, a ***** I'll destroy you from the inside And I'll leave you sore I'll take everything you've got to give And then I'll take some more

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Mar 20, 2019

Mar 20, 2019 at 8:40 PM UTC

Jezebel

I'll attach my soul to yours whether you want it or not We'll be soulmates in this life and beyond My love is such a bitter seed It festers and spoils itself into a toxic **** If you could want me an eighth as much as I want you I'll be content The time of sunshine and rainbows Came and went Happiness is for winners I'm just a ***** sinner A hopeless dream Undone at the seams But I'll stitch you to my blackened heart I'll always be unclean You know you love the way I scream And babe we'll be forever Our tie can't ever be severed No not even death could cut us apart It's cold inside my soul Empty hollow mess It rained in my head And snowed inside my chest But my heart still beats An icy drum As your fingers linger idly On my aching skin I want you so bad it hurts You say you love me The lie seeps in Destruction and decay All that's left for me to give Daring you to stay Hoping that you live There were so many before you I hope that you'll be my last They all ran from my crazy But they kept coming back There's just something about me That makes them all wanna stay and leave I'll make you feel real good but then I'll make you feel real bad Here's a warning When I beg you not to go You'd better not listen to me I'm the harlot in that story You know the good book don't tell lies I am what it says that I am And I've lived so many lives Jezebel they call me A murderess, a ***** I'll destroy you from the inside And I'll leave you sore I'll take everything you've got to give And then I'll take some more

53

I'm not perfect I never said I was And this pedestal you put me on Makes me feel not good enough I'm afraid of heights I know I'm going to fall When you find out what I really am We're going to lose it all These broken wings These torn up things A crown of lies atop my head My horns poking through So sad but so true I wish I was dead I'm no good for you She's coming out to play Satan's ***** Animate once more Here to ruin the day

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Jan 3, 2019

Jan 3, 2019 at 9:07 AM UTC

Overwhelmed

I'm not perfect I never said I was And this pedestal you put me on Makes me feel not good enough I'm afraid of heights I know I'm going to fall When you find out what I really am We're going to lose it all These broken wings These torn up things A crown of lies atop my head My horns poking through So sad but so true I wish I was dead I'm no good for you She's coming out to play Satan's ***** Animate once more Here to ruin the day

19

Stumbling over emotions I thought I'd never feel Not knowing which way I'm going Or if it's even real Heart beat so fast like a hi hat Slinking through the dark like a black cat I should've known better but I couldn't help it I wanted you Billowing dark clouds rolling in Tears streaming down like rain on my skin Didn't wanna ever have to feel again Heart slowing down like depression I don't think I'll ever learn my lesson I'd give it all up just to keep one more night with you fast asleep I need you I can't tell you what I want to say You'd only think I'd get in your way And it wouldn't be long before I'm me again, crazy, crying over nothing Jealous, fighting, sneaking and lying, always blaming you for something but... I think I love you

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Dec 27, 2018

Dec 27, 2018 at 10:07 AM UTC

I Think I Love You

Stumbling over emotions I thought I'd never feel Not knowing which way I'm going Or if it's even real Heart beat so fast like a hi hat Slinking through the dark like a black cat I should've known better but I couldn't help it I wanted you Billowing dark clouds rolling in Tears streaming down like rain on my skin Didn't wanna ever have to feel again Heart slowing down like depression I don't think I'll ever learn my lesson I'd give it all up just to keep one more night with you fast asleep I need you I can't tell you what I want to say You'd only think I'd get in your way And it wouldn't be long before I'm me again, crazy, crying over nothing Jealous, fighting, sneaking and lying, always blaming you for something but... I think I love you

20

Every heartbeat Like a second hand Moving closer To the end Sorry doesn't cut it that's for sure How sad it is When tables turn I figured it out But you'll never learn Both of us so insecure Alone in love so many years And now you want to relieve my fears I don't think I need you here Anymore more more This is my goodbye lullaby It's the end now of our story We fought and lost babe There's no glory Like Romeo and Juliet No one wins, no safe bets This is my goodbye lullaby If I find a portal to fairy land I might try to love you all over again But only if the mushrooms say it's safe And if the door's opened to wonderland Where I fit in, hope you'd understand If I stayed there forever cuz I'm insane Don't try to touch me now It's over, love's bleeding out Withered lump in my chest - I can feel it die I don't know What comes next Hollowed heart Bated breath Staring my demons down- with a sigh

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Nov 30, 2018

Nov 30, 2018 at 9:00 PM UTC

Goodbye Lullaby

Every heartbeat Like a second hand Moving closer To the end Sorry doesn't cut it that's for sure How sad it is When tables turn I figured it out But you'll never learn Both of us so insecure Alone in love so many years And now you want to relieve my fears I don't think I need you here Anymore more more This is my goodbye lullaby It's the end now of our story We fought and lost babe There's no glory Like Romeo and Juliet No one wins, no safe bets This is my goodbye lullaby If I find a portal to fairy land I might try to love you all over again But only if the mushrooms say it's safe And if the door's opened to wonderland Where I fit in, hope you'd understand If I stayed there forever cuz I'm insane Don't try to touch me now It's over, love's bleeding out Withered lump in my chest - I can feel it die I don't know What comes next Hollowed heart Bated breath Staring my demons down- with a sigh

37

Been fighting all day Keep calling me names You promised it'd get better But everything's still the same Yeah, I got your ***** Done keeping my cool Go tell your friends, I ain't playing no more, and it's Queen ***** to you Now there ain't no reason For me to stay It don't matter how much you wanna fight I'm still leaving today You ain't sorry, no I'm done with your games I'm not your baby no more Walking out the door I knew you'd never change Goodbye's too good for you I don't wanna say it You don't need to hear it What's through is through It ain't gonna change the fact that I'm gone It ain't gonna make you see that you're wrong It ain't gonna take back everything that you put me through Oh baby goodbye's too **** good for you

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Nov 30, 2018

Nov 30, 2018 at 5:59 PM UTC

Goodbye's Too Good For You

Been fighting all day Keep calling me names You promised it'd get better But everything's still the same Yeah, I got your ***** Done keeping my cool Go tell your friends, I ain't playing no more, and it's Queen ***** to you Now there ain't no reason For me to stay It don't matter how much you wanna fight I'm still leaving today You ain't sorry, no I'm done with your games I'm not your baby no more Walking out the door I knew you'd never change Goodbye's too good for you I don't wanna say it You don't need to hear it What's through is through It ain't gonna change the fact that I'm gone It ain't gonna make you see that you're wrong It ain't gonna take back everything that you put me through Oh baby goodbye's too **** good for you

26

Come down from the tops of the trees they said. Sit amongst the broken twigs and the dead leaves they said. Twist your frame into that mold they said. Out pops another cookie cutter Christian. A hollow vessel. So I can't be me, but like you instead.

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Nov 30, 2018

Nov 30, 2018 at 11:10 AM UTC

Religious Cults Are Awesome!

Come down from the tops of the trees they said. Sit amongst the broken twigs and the dead leaves they said. Twist your frame into that mold they said. Out pops another cookie cutter Christian. A hollow vessel. So I can't be me, but like you instead.

6

you aren't special every year around this time he chooses a toy you aren't special he's a man with the mentality of a little boy you aren't special he WILL lose interest in you you aren't special i know all your secrets too ;-) you aren't special you're the side chick, I'M the WIFE you aren't special he may be with you a few days, a few nights he's with me for the REST of his LIFE

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Nov 21, 2015

Nov 21, 2015 at 12:46 PM UTC

You Aren't Special

you aren't special every year around this time he chooses a toy you aren't special he's a man with the mentality of a little boy you aren't special he WILL lose interest in you you aren't special i know all your secrets too ;-) you aren't special you're the side chick, I'M the WIFE you aren't special he may be with you a few days, a few nights he's with me for the REST of his LIFE

13

saw something i can't erase from my memory yet it's physically deleted from yours. now there is no proof of your infidelity besides my word. you make excuses and tell me to keep quiet not to start something over nothing. what is nothing to you is a lot of something to me. you care more about the feelings of another than you do about mine. you lie to others about our relationship you act as if you don't love me as if you will leave me but the second i say i will leave you you are crying, with more excuses. this is an all too familiar road for me and i refuse to go down it again. so many tears and excuses now i could drown in them. you still fight to keep toxic things in your life. you still fight to keep me content by your side. what your reasons are i will never understand. you never really loved me you don't know what love is. i will find a way to expose you both. the last laugh will be mine.

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Nov 21, 2015

Nov 21, 2015 at 12:26 PM UTC

Caught Him Deleting Messages From His Phone

saw something i can't erase from my memory yet it's physically deleted from yours. now there is no proof of your infidelity besides my word. you make excuses and tell me to keep quiet not to start something over nothing. what is nothing to you is a lot of something to me. you care more about the feelings of another than you do about mine. you lie to others about our relationship you act as if you don't love me as if you will leave me but the second i say i will leave you you are crying, with more excuses. this is an all too familiar road for me and i refuse to go down it again. so many tears and excuses now i could drown in them. you still fight to keep toxic things in your life. you still fight to keep me content by your side. what your reasons are i will never understand. you never really loved me you don't know what love is. i will find a way to expose you both. the last laugh will be mine.

29

Where were you when I started crying every day at 2? Where were you when life contemplating was the only thing I could do? Where were you when the pain of every thing that has ever hurt me hit me all at once? Where were you when I found the razor blade and started cutting again for fun? Where were you when I cut too deep and the world slowly faded to black? You aren't here, you never are, so who knows whose fate is that.

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Nov 11, 2015

Nov 11, 2015 at 9:56 AM UTC

Where Were You?

Where were you when I started crying every day at 2? Where were you when life contemplating was the only thing I could do? Where were you when the pain of every thing that has ever hurt me hit me all at once? Where were you when I found the razor blade and started cutting again for fun? Where were you when I cut too deep and the world slowly faded to black? You aren't here, you never are, so who knows whose fate is that.

6

When I heard about it I was hurt, saddened, mortified. I couldn't believe someone I remembered to be so full of life had died. I remember playing D&D; for hours at a time. I remember our characters always doing something out of line. I remember your brother (as our DM) playing a little frog to help us get back on track. I remember stealing only pens and that same little frog eraser at walmart, just to have security stop us outside and ask me for the nail polish back. I remember our photo shoot, and the picture of us standing back to back. And the one that looked like you were staring at my shirt, we all had a big laugh about that. I remember when you and I became close, and were together almost everyday. I remember how reckless we were, but wasn't that always our way? I remember karaoke nights, going clubbing, parties at Casey's, and trips to Niagara Falls. I remember through everything what a good friend you were to me, I remember that most of all. I love you and miss you Jon. I will always remember you.

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Jan 30, 2015

Jan 30, 2015 at 10:36 PM UTC

Written 8/15/12 for J.C.

When I heard about it I was hurt, saddened, mortified. I couldn't believe someone I remembered to be so full of life had died. I remember playing D&D; for hours at a time. I remember our characters always doing something out of line. I remember your brother (as our DM) playing a little frog to help us get back on track. I remember stealing only pens and that same little frog eraser at walmart, just to have security stop us outside and ask me for the nail polish back. I remember our photo shoot, and the picture of us standing back to back. And the one that looked like you were staring at my shirt, we all had a big laugh about that. I remember when you and I became close, and were together almost everyday. I remember how reckless we were, but wasn't that always our way? I remember karaoke nights, going clubbing, parties at Casey's, and trips to Niagara Falls. I remember through everything what a good friend you were to me, I remember that most of all. I love you and miss you Jon. I will always remember you.

14