I wish i could show I actually love you
But in every way, i could never
Because my meaning of everything is different from yours
I wanna love you but you wont let me
I tried to tell you everyday
That i love you in every possible way
You just don’t see it
You are truly the light in my darkness.
Because even while you’re at work, you make time for me.
No matter what i can see you love me
Ive just hurt you too much
Mar 31, 2019
Mar 31, 2019 at 2:16 AM UTC
i’m broken and i know it
there’s things i should have kept inside
but i let myself be vulnerable with you
you gave up on us and me
then turned around and told me i’m amazing
you numbed me when you were around me
i’m a different person when i get home
it reflects through texts
i’ve told you about so much and you just couldn’t add it up
i hurt you and now it feels like you’re hurting me
i’m more hurt at the fact that you gave me up on me
you did fix me the way you wanted to
you got somewhere but then gave up
that’s where you messed up
i loved you endlessly and you just couldn’t even return the favor
i told you i loved you everyday
i loved every moment with you and everything you gave me
Feb 2, 2019
Feb 2, 2019 at 1:50 AM UTC
When you start dating someone, they become your all
And give you some kind of motivation
You become happy that this person is in your life
And you are willing to give anything to love this person
But once it becomes known that you have to keep your relationship secret,
Everything becomes worse
Because suddenly you feel like they aren’t happy to make it known that you belong to that person and love them
And that’s all i ever wanted from a person
Suddenly I’m feeling my mind shut down and think of the worst
I told my best friend that i need alone time
But that’s just me isolating myself from the world
And that is the worst thing i can do right now
In the end, i cant cry or cut because it will bring more harm than good
I just wanted to be loved in the right way
Jan 7, 2019
Jan 7, 2019 at 8:06 PM UTC
It’s been a while since I’ve done something that made me happy
Writing these poems or whatever you wanna call them
Helps me release my feelings and a little weight off my shoulders
They are my way of journaling and hold some of my secrets
I bring people into my life not knowing if they are gonna benefit me or hurt me
You don’t know who your true friends are until you’re in need of help
You don’t see their true colors in the beginning
There’s nothing i can possibly do to keep many great friends
But also sometimes i need space
That’s how i met my ex boyfriend and knew i was gonna fall in love with him
He listened to me and tried to understand what was going on in my life and mind
I have so much emotional scars from the emotional abuse in my past
Jan 1, 2019
Jan 1, 2019 at 2:36 PM UTC
My birthday isn’t a big thing anymore
Like yes i do a dinner but nothing big
I think the one thing i really like about my birthday
Is to have all my friends tell me happy birthday
And well david, that’s my best friend
He plays too much
He said happy birthday to me right at 12 am
I’m doing breakfast with my dad
Then dinner with the family
I’m finally 16
Dec 28, 2018
Dec 28, 2018 at 3:54 AM UTC
I make decisions for myself and yes they may not be good. They will benefit me in some way. Ive decided to leave my mom’s side of my family at a distance for now. I want to continue succeeding but I always let my mind take over. And it brings me no good.
Dec 26, 2018
Dec 26, 2018 at 10:54 PM UTC
You make me forget about everything I worry about
And you are always making me the happiest i can be
Every time i look up at you
I cant help but smile at you
Because I couldn’t imagine a better person holding me
And kissing me
You make my life so better
I wanna be in your arms right now
But i have to wait until the 27th
And when i see you babe i gonna kiss you like I haven’t seen you in months
Cause that’s how i feel
Who would of thought I’d get you?
You talk about wedding rings
And make me feel more beautiful than ever
Dec 26, 2018
Dec 26, 2018 at 4:37 AM UTC
If i could you the world, i would
You have given me so much these past few days
And i can never thank you enough
I want to give you my heart, the stars and all the planets
You motivate me to be my best self
And I just wanna be the best person you will meet
Dec 25, 2018
Dec 25, 2018 at 10:05 PM UTC
To be sexually assaulted
At such a young age
And I was never ready for what you did
From the bad experiences with guys
You just made it worse
You were the first person to give me trust issues
i got away before anything scarring happened
But you still left a image in my head of what you did to me
I was 7 and you were 18
I wish I would have told someone then
But I let it drag on in my mind for 8 years
Before anyone ever know
Yet I never got to recover and am still reminded of you
When a guy touches me where you put your hands
There isn’t any excuse for what you did
Dec 21, 2018
Dec 21, 2018 at 11:12 AM UTC
Lost in the world
Lost on a path that leads to death
It’s like going deeper and deeper into the woods without knowing if you can ever escape
Tried getting people to tell you what you don’t wanna hear
Just trying to get a push in the right direction
But everyone is gonna have different ways of telling you what you’re doing to yourself is gonna hurt the people who care about you
Not scared of what happens in the end
As long as it’s successful
The world isn’t a place for such a broken girl
Don’t think it will get better
Too many guys
Too many scars
Too much conflict
For it just to be ended at any second
Dec 8, 2018
Dec 8, 2018 at 3:04 AM UTC