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Vannahbby89
Vannahbby89
35/F/United States My name is savannah I live in a small town called Lancaster SC. I live writing cause it tells people how I feel and what I've been through and maybe they can relate. I also love music if I can't say how I feel I can find a song that can
Questions running wild like a mustang in the night All I've ever done in this life is try to make u proud Now i see it clear as day I'm never gonna be enough to earn ur love Broken hearted since my first breathe I'm not what u wanted I paid the price for ur mistake with tears falling like rain I had Nowhere to go Stuck in place as i watched my life slip away On my knees every night since i was eight Praying to god to end it i was ready to die Everyday is a war and im struggling to stay alive No battle is won alone thats what they say anyways Now im gonna prove them wrong Got a one way ticket to another state 20000 miles away Ur not gonna see me break Not gonna watch tears going down my face U wont get to see me rise above the the pain and the heartbreak Of the hell u made My chains are gone My soul is free U can't blame me anymore Just me myself and i Running wild and free I'm at peace with a smile on my face. U can't take that away.
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Nov 14, 2025
Nov 14, 2025 at 3:57 PM UTC
Questions?
Pounding in my chest Shaking body Mind racing Is this the end? Im tired so so tired Of everything Seems like its never gonna end Nothing is changing My heart is always breaking Im never enough No ones first choice Im the backup plan Always last place ! Heart to pure A weapon formed against me. Looks like the end Their words are lies The devil in disguise Taunting me in everyway Fight back with all my might Still im in the gutter tonight. Energy low ! to weak to stand Safe to say its the end. Dont cry when u lay me to rest Say u loved me thats a lie U only loved wat i could do How good it made u feel Funny right Slimy as a snake Sneaky as a mouse Ur their problem now See im no longer there for u to break me No more using me as ur toy It ended The day i closed my eyes From ur hand I left this life Heaven or hell idk nor do i care Anywhere is better than being stuck in the shadows Waiting for ur call Distant love Always failed So i bid u farewell Until ur tragic end Brings me back to life
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Nov 14, 2025
Nov 14, 2025 at 3:20 PM UTC
The End
Excuse me, mister, can you tell me where I am got lost somewhere between my dreams and reality. I've been gone for way too long. Trying to chase a shadow of a man who made me take a wrong turn, I lost myself in the smoke coming from that bowl he had been passing around. I tried to save myself, but both my feet collapsed, and now the devil is holding me down. I can't get up. Made one too many mistakes guess I have to lie in the bed I made. Excuse me, ma'am, can you help me? I've been looking all over this town for a girl, have you seen her? She looks like me, only happier. I fell in love with a wannabe gangsta who took me on a high-speed chase, then he left me stranded. Swapped me out with a girl who only wants him for the smoke I got lost in. Now it's time to find my way back to where I belong. But I still have my vices that I'm fighting there's no point in hiding it. Why can't I have it just for a little while? I need just enough time to get back on my feet. Then I'll leave it in the dust where it belongs. I'm going to show everyone what I'm made of. I'm stronger than before; no more lies they tell everyone. They're just mad that I got out alive and left them in the past. I'm not looking back. I've lived, and I've loved there were even lessons learned. Going to start putting myself first. Not going to be making any more wrong turns, so I'll catch you later. I hope you'll get what you deserve. Never gave up, never lost hope. I finally found where I belong. I got back home. I fought for my life, barely hanging on, but I won. I survived this war within my soul, finally free of all the hurtful memories.  I'm back to being me.
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Dec 25, 2024
Dec 25, 2024 at 1:06 PM UTC
Excuse Me
Excuse me, mister, can you tell me where I am got lost somewhere between my dreams and reality. I've been gone for way too long. Trying to chase a shadow of a man who made me take a wrong turn, I lost myself in the smoke coming from that bowl he had been passing around. I tried to save myself, but both my feet collapsed, and now the devil is holding me down. I can't get up. Made one too many mistakes guess I have to lie in the bed I made. Excuse me, ma'am, can you help me? I've been looking all over this town for a girl, have you seen her? She looks like me, only happier. I fell in love with a wannabe gangsta who took me on a high-speed chase, then he left me stranded. Swapped me out with a girl who only wants him for the smoke I got lost in. Now it's time to find my way back to where I belong. But I still have my vices that I'm fighting there's no point in hiding it. Why can't I have it just for a little while? I need just enough time to get back on my feet. Then I'll leave it in the dust where it belongs. I'm going to show everyone what I'm made of. I'm stronger than before; no more lies they tell everyone. They're just mad that I got out alive and left them in the past. I'm not looking back. I've lived, and I've loved there were even lessons learned. Going to start putting myself first. Not going to be making any more wrong turns, so I'll catch you later. I hope you'll get what you deserve. Never gave up, never lost hope. I finally found where I belong. I got back home. I fought for my life, barely hanging on, but I won. I survived this war within my soul, finally free of all the hurtful memories.  I'm back to being me.
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You always said it was my fault that I'm to blame ***** please u never knew how to stay in ur lane ur the one who's playing these silly games lying to his  face what u think i didn't  see ur wicked  schemes Stupid ***** ur Trippin if u ever thought I was dumb Thought u playeded me but ***** look who won Sorry not sorry thought u were gonna have it all But truth is you will never be as good as me Cant compare to a real ***** Oops didn't u know u a *** a white trash wannabe U joined the golddiggin *** family at the age of three Stupid freak Jealous what was I thinking I'm a twenty out of ten while ur in the garbage bin Petty ***** mad that he was mine could of stopped u but I let it slide Karma is what ur gonna get Oh stupid ***** can't play with fire she is a real lady who's Keeping it on the grind do it for myself no matter the cost Stupid ***** ur just a glass bowl Rolling smoking waste of space Get the **** out of my face stupid white trash *** Kiss my *** stupid ***** u can try and get me if u want Its not gonna change the fact that your a smelly ugly golddiggin *** Stupid ***** stupid ***** I forgive but I don't forget Playing nice cause I see u got it bad on the streets again They say a woman knows her place well ***** Im sorry to let u know I'm  taking ur dignity U can tell ur homeless look like a ****** *** raggedy ann doll Came in this world looking like a ***** little ****** up toy Mom made the choice daddy ran away poor little freak Ur a washed up trick can't do what a real woman should Stupid ***** stupid ***** It's pathetic and sad when a mother gets dissed by her own kids What a shame to be so disgusted with ur self White trash trailer Park *** thats all u are U can't make bread unless ur legs are up in the air while ur mister for the night is grasping for air Stinky ***** u peed ur pants here u go some depends stupid ***** stupid ***** Thought u won the prize sorry ur disqualified Stupid ***** stupid ***** Step to the left and close that door u got a bad odor that's coming from down under Stupid ***** stupid ***** Now take a bow the queen has finally stood her ground.   Stupid ***** stupid ***** Go back into ur freaky freak world Stupid stupid ***** Ur a real *** got no respect for a single soul Stupid ***** Drugs all u think about not what u need to do Real ladies know how to make it for their self Stupid ***** No remorse hiding behind closed doors stupid ***** stupid ***** Ya the police a no good snicth better watch ur back Gonna end up in a body a ditch no where to be found The streets will be screaming joy when ur stupid *** *** gone Stupid ***** Think ur a real piece and everyone wants ya Stupid ***** Open ya eyes and realize ur  a zero a real big mess To old for these young guns stupid ***** I have an idea let's go to the nursing home maybe the one for u is in a wheelchair Stupid ***** I ain't  wasting Anymore of my valuable time spitting the truth about u. As they say ur gonna hang urself in time And the truth always comes to light Stupid ***** Have a great time when u bust through the gates of the golddiggin hell Stupid ***** He will always be mine Stupid ***** Try to come at me with ur worthless lies We'll see who's still standing when the battle is won. Final round oops u got knocked tf out. Stupid *****
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Dec 21, 2024
Dec 21, 2024 at 7:49 AM UTC
Stupid *****
You always said it was my fault that I'm to blame ***** please u never knew how to stay in ur lane ur the one who's playing these silly games lying to his  face what u think i didn't  see ur wicked  schemes Stupid ***** ur Trippin if u ever thought I was dumb Thought u playeded me but ***** look who won Sorry not sorry thought u were gonna have it all But truth is you will never be as good as me Cant compare to a real ***** Oops didn't u know u a *** a white trash wannabe U joined the golddiggin *** family at the age of three Stupid freak Jealous what was I thinking I'm a twenty out of ten while ur in the garbage bin Petty ***** mad that he was mine could of stopped u but I let it slide Karma is what ur gonna get Oh stupid ***** can't play with fire she is a real lady who's Keeping it on the grind do it for myself no matter the cost Stupid ***** ur just a glass bowl Rolling smoking waste of space Get the **** out of my face stupid white trash *** Kiss my *** stupid ***** u can try and get me if u want Its not gonna change the fact that your a smelly ugly golddiggin *** Stupid ***** stupid ***** I forgive but I don't forget Playing nice cause I see u got it bad on the streets again They say a woman knows her place well ***** Im sorry to let u know I'm  taking ur dignity U can tell ur homeless look like a ****** *** raggedy ann doll Came in this world looking like a ***** little ****** up toy Mom made the choice daddy ran away poor little freak Ur a washed up trick can't do what a real woman should Stupid ***** stupid ***** It's pathetic and sad when a mother gets dissed by her own kids What a shame to be so disgusted with ur self White trash trailer Park *** thats all u are U can't make bread unless ur legs are up in the air while ur mister for the night is grasping for air Stinky ***** u peed ur pants here u go some depends stupid ***** stupid ***** Thought u won the prize sorry ur disqualified Stupid ***** stupid ***** Step to the left and close that door u got a bad odor that's coming from down under Stupid ***** stupid ***** Now take a bow the queen has finally stood her ground.   Stupid ***** stupid ***** Go back into ur freaky freak world Stupid stupid ***** Ur a real *** got no respect for a single soul Stupid ***** Drugs all u think about not what u need to do Real ladies know how to make it for their self Stupid ***** No remorse hiding behind closed doors stupid ***** stupid ***** Ya the police a no good snicth better watch ur back Gonna end up in a body a ditch no where to be found The streets will be screaming joy when ur stupid *** *** gone Stupid ***** Think ur a real piece and everyone wants ya Stupid ***** Open ya eyes and realize ur  a zero a real big mess To old for these young guns stupid ***** I have an idea let's go to the nursing home maybe the one for u is in a wheelchair Stupid ***** I ain't  wasting Anymore of my valuable time spitting the truth about u. As they say ur gonna hang urself in time And the truth always comes to light Stupid ***** Have a great time when u bust through the gates of the golddiggin hell Stupid ***** He will always be mine Stupid ***** Try to come at me with ur worthless lies We'll see who's still standing when the battle is won. Final round oops u got knocked tf out. Stupid *****
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Thoughts come again and again they never end Self sabotage cause I'm a broken mess **** a relationship up faster than it began Don't wanna get hurt again so I'll keep this charade up til I'm whole again Sorry to the ones who tried their best to get me to love again It's me and my head we're fighting again Got knocked down a time or two but I'm not giving into The voices that are screaming Ur ugly Not worthy Of anything or anyone Sorry to the ones who love me I hope u will forgive me Maybe one day u could understand why I am the way I am Push people away to save myself from the hurt and so they won't see I'm dying inide fighting the voices the demons who won't stop screaming at me Ur ugly Not worthy Of anything or anyone It's a hard battle but I know it's not gonna be this way forever Sorry for my sinful ways don't mean to hurt u just need an escape Lying to myself thinking people care Whispers behind my back spreading like a wildfire She's ugly Not worthy Of anything or anyone Hold ur head up u got this that's what they all say If u only knew the truth and u were in my shoes U would see how far I've come Sorry I'm not the girl u used to know the old me is gone Scars from all the hurt I've been through Made me who I am today
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Dec 21, 2024
Dec 21, 2024 at 7:46 AM UTC
Who I Am
Its 3 am and its no surprise that im crying again Why cant i just have one night to not feel so **** weak is that to hard to ask Who the hell am i kidding so come on in lets start this **** show **** **** these voices in my head the damage has already been done so why make me go through it all again All the Words we said cant be unspoken All the games we played can't be undone All the accusing and the using never came to an end Should've left forgot ur name and all the drama u made After all these years apart thought id be over him **** **** why does my heart still break fall apart from the memories of him Gave my all to this man did things for this man that i would never do Gave him my heart and in return he did me ***** Left me bleeding out on the floor as he walked out the door Yet after all he put me through i still have love for him But it will never be the same and all i can do now is be a friend All the Words we said cant be unspoken All the games we played can't be undone All the accusing and the using never came to an end Should've left forgot ur name and all the drama u made After all these years apart thought id be over him He was the love of my life while i was just another notch in his belt Cried for days at a time missing a man who never gave a **** about me He moved on to someone else the day we fell apart While my heart felt like it was missing the other half that made it whole For two years had me thinking it was all my fault When the truth is ur the one to blame All the Words we said cant be unspoken All the games we played can't be undone All the accusing and the using never came to an end Should've left forgot ur name and all the drama u made After all these years apart thought id be over him Thought i would never see the light without him by my side Glad i was wrong now that i found out how to love myself Know my worth and how i should be treated by a man It was a long journey to get here with all the wrong turns and bumps In my way Finally seeing a way out of the hell he made The voices weren't so bad after all Helped me understand that some men arent men at all He was one of them. Now it's time for me to get back up and try again find the right one Now that page is done see u in the next one.
0
Dec 21, 2024
Dec 21, 2024 at 6:27 AM UTC
****
Its 3 am and its no surprise that im crying again Why cant i just have one night to not feel so **** weak is that to hard to ask Who the hell am i kidding so come on in lets start this **** show **** **** these voices in my head the damage has already been done so why make me go through it all again All the Words we said cant be unspoken All the games we played can't be undone All the accusing and the using never came to an end Should've left forgot ur name and all the drama u made After all these years apart thought id be over him **** **** why does my heart still break fall apart from the memories of him Gave my all to this man did things for this man that i would never do Gave him my heart and in return he did me ***** Left me bleeding out on the floor as he walked out the door Yet after all he put me through i still have love for him But it will never be the same and all i can do now is be a friend All the Words we said cant be unspoken All the games we played can't be undone All the accusing and the using never came to an end Should've left forgot ur name and all the drama u made After all these years apart thought id be over him He was the love of my life while i was just another notch in his belt Cried for days at a time missing a man who never gave a **** about me He moved on to someone else the day we fell apart While my heart felt like it was missing the other half that made it whole For two years had me thinking it was all my fault When the truth is ur the one to blame All the Words we said cant be unspoken All the games we played can't be undone All the accusing and the using never came to an end Should've left forgot ur name and all the drama u made After all these years apart thought id be over him Thought i would never see the light without him by my side Glad i was wrong now that i found out how to love myself Know my worth and how i should be treated by a man It was a long journey to get here with all the wrong turns and bumps In my way Finally seeing a way out of the hell he made The voices weren't so bad after all Helped me understand that some men arent men at all He was one of them. Now it's time for me to get back up and try again find the right one Now that page is done see u in the next one.
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44
UNLOVED Now I see how it is I see that I was always right Don't think of me at all u don't care how I feel What makes me cry and wish I wasn't alive Can I die tonight Never meant a thing to u glad to know what u been saying about me is true Unwanted U never wanted me always put me last in the back of ur mind Am I honestly that bad What did I ever do to be unloved by u Thought that people in ur shoes are supposed to love their kids unconditionally Guess that's not true it's killing me that I've lived my life trying to win ur love and make u proud of me Now I see Unwanted U never wanted me always put me last in the back of ur mind Am I honestly that bad What did I ever do to be unloved by u Nobody left on my side I'm all alone What am I gonna do can't live like this My heart breaks everyday cause I thought u were always gonna be there But I see Unwanted U never wanted me always put me last in the back of ur mind Am I honestly that bad What did I ever do to be unloved by u All I'll ever have in this world is me I'll never know what it feels like to be loved right All I know is pain and misery I tried so hard to be what u wanted Never got a chance to find who I really am but now I know Unwanted U never wanted me always put me last in the back of ur mind Am I honestly that bad What did I ever do to be unloved by u Never good enough always blamed for everything Judged because of what I do I'm sorry I'm nothing like u Is that it that I'm more like him than u Wish I could be what u wanted me to be Then it wouldnt feel like this Unwanted U never wanted me always put me last in the back of ur mind Am I honestly that bad What did I ever do to be unloved by u Tears fall all the time cause everyone leaves turns their back on me I'm fighting a loosing battle and it's slowly killing me Thanks for showing me a life of misery
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Dec 21, 2024
Dec 21, 2024 at 6:21 AM UTC
Unwanted
UNLOVED Now I see how it is I see that I was always right Don't think of me at all u don't care how I feel What makes me cry and wish I wasn't alive Can I die tonight Never meant a thing to u glad to know what u been saying about me is true Unwanted U never wanted me always put me last in the back of ur mind Am I honestly that bad What did I ever do to be unloved by u Thought that people in ur shoes are supposed to love their kids unconditionally Guess that's not true it's killing me that I've lived my life trying to win ur love and make u proud of me Now I see Unwanted U never wanted me always put me last in the back of ur mind Am I honestly that bad What did I ever do to be unloved by u Nobody left on my side I'm all alone What am I gonna do can't live like this My heart breaks everyday cause I thought u were always gonna be there But I see Unwanted U never wanted me always put me last in the back of ur mind Am I honestly that bad What did I ever do to be unloved by u All I'll ever have in this world is me I'll never know what it feels like to be loved right All I know is pain and misery I tried so hard to be what u wanted Never got a chance to find who I really am but now I know Unwanted U never wanted me always put me last in the back of ur mind Am I honestly that bad What did I ever do to be unloved by u Never good enough always blamed for everything Judged because of what I do I'm sorry I'm nothing like u Is that it that I'm more like him than u Wish I could be what u wanted me to be Then it wouldnt feel like this Unwanted U never wanted me always put me last in the back of ur mind Am I honestly that bad What did I ever do to be unloved by u Tears fall all the time cause everyone leaves turns their back on me I'm fighting a loosing battle and it's slowly killing me Thanks for showing me a life of misery
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