The guy sees her and smiles
he sees the way she smiles
he sees the way she laugh
he sees the way her short hair is done the same way each day
he sees the way she changes
he sees the way she smiles less
he sees the way her laugh is chaning
He sees the way her short hair is done the saw way each day
he sees the way shes starting to wear sleeves
he sees the way people look at her
he sees the way she crys
he sees the way her smile is gone
he sees the way her laugh is gone
he sees the way the tears roll down her face
he sees the way the scares on her wrist are bleeding
he sees the way less people showed up at her funral
he sees the way he becomes her
May 9, 2018
May 9, 2018 at 1:17 PM UTC
so much pressure
such little time
such a big heart
such a small person
so many tears
so many feelings
so many thoughts
too much for one person
too much pressure for a small person
too many feelings for a small person
too many tears for a small person
too big of a heart for a small person
too little time for a small person
too many things going on
too many people in life
too many things for a small person
Apr 10, 2018
Apr 10, 2018 at 12:41 PM UTC
Alexis, get a job
Alexis, do your homework
Alexis, don't forget about Missouri state
Alexis, are you ready to move out
Alexis, are you ready to graduate
Alexis, don't forget about school
Alexis can you pick up your brothers I'm not home yet
Alexis can you run to the store
Alexis go to bed
Alexis do this
Alexis do that
Alexis get out of your room
Alexis don't get sassy with me
Alexis go to your room
WHAT THE **** MOM AND DAD
WHY THE **** SHOULD I WORRY ABOUT COLLEGE
I'M ONLY 16
I understand i'm turning 17 but still you guys put way too much pressure on me
just stop asking so much of me
I can only handle so much before i explode
Right now I'm about to explode
I cant handle all of these things
Let me worry about what i need to worry about
That is school and myslef
I don't need to worry about college and moving out
I'M ONLY 16!
Apr 3, 2018
Apr 3, 2018 at 2:05 PM UTC
She cries out for help
She writes letters to her mom
'mom i need help'
Her mom tries and tries but she doesn't know her litter girl is dying
Her mom doesn't understand that her brain is killing her
The girl cried out for help through any way she can
She writes poems but everyone thinks its something she likes to do
They don't know the pain she is going through
She doesn't eat
She doesn't go out with friends
She stays in her room and cries
Everyone thinks she over reacting
Everyone thinks its cool
She used to cut
She stays up until 3 or 4 in the morning crying
She begs for help
She writes and writes to help ease the pain
She takes pills
nothing is helping
She seems happy but she is so sad
it becomes the norm
Her brain brings back the bad days
Her brain fights her and wins everyday
She tries to fight back but loses
She gives it her everything but loses
She cries for help through her writing
No one listens
Someone help this poor girl
This poor girl feels helpless
She is really trying
She cries most of the time
she really does try to get better
SOMEONE HELP THIS GIRL
SOMEONE JUST TALK TO HER
Her family tells her that she should be happy
She says she happy when shes not
Its no ones fault but hers
she blames herself for everything
She says sorry more times than one person should
She says sorry for things she shouldn't say sorry for
She wants this to end
She wants to pain to stop
She tries to count to ten but she cant even get pass the number one
She cant breath
She cant make up her mind about life
She feels overwhelmed
She feels have the time shes better dead
other times she wants to live
She wants to get married and have kids
Her brain doesn't like it
Her brain brings her down
She tries to lift it up help it
Nothing.
She needs help
She needs to talk to someone
She tries to be happy
She really does
She tries to do more and more things in school
She tries making more friends
She tries to get out of her box
She has contest for choir
She has the college picked out
She has her whole life planned out
She really tries to happy
Nothing helps.
She tries to think but she can't
She cant finish her thoughts
She needs help
Mar 5, 2018
Mar 5, 2018 at 1:55 PM UTC
My brain goes back to that day
Everyone talks about him
Everyone talks about how hot he is
Everyone talks about how's amazing he is
They don't know what he did
They don't know what happned
They don't know how I felt
They don't know anything about it
They don't know that I blame myself
They don't my brain goes back to that day
That room
That table
The tears I cried
They don't know that it keeps me up at night
My brain plays it like a movie
My brain plays it every night over and over again
They don't know what he did to me
They think it's a joke
They think I wanted it
They think I'm telling a lie
They made it seem like it was my fault
They don;t know he's a person who is like that
They don't know what happened
My brain goes back to the words he says
My brain goes back to the shame I felt
My brain goes back to that disgusting day
My brain goes back to the police station
My brain goes back to that day
I wish it would stop
Feb 14, 2018
Feb 14, 2018 at 1:51 PM UTC
Some days I feel like I'm on the top of the world
Other days I feel like I'm on the bottom of the world
Some days I'm fearless
Other days I'm fearful
Some days I'm happy
Other days i'm numb
Some days I feel like i'm doing awesome
Other days I feel like i'm failing
Some days I feel fine
Other days I feel so depressed
Some days are better than others
Other days are better than none
Some days I'm happy with life
Other days I'm so numb with everything
Some days I'm telling the truth
Other days I'm telling a lie
Some days I feel like eating
Other days I don't
Some days I wish I would stop being like this
Other days I cant help it
Some days I feel so small
Other days I feel even smaller
Some days I cry for no reason
Other days I cry for the same reason
Some days I'm fine
Other days I'm not
Some days are better than others
Other days are better than none
Some days I feel calm and relaxed
Other days I feel so stressed and i cant think
Feb 9, 2018
Feb 9, 2018 at 12:47 PM UTC
What does it mean to be depressed?
does it mean to be just sad?
Does it mean that you have thoughts that make you depressed?
What about anxiety?
Do you start shaking when you're stressed?
Do you tremble when you here a familiar sound?
Do you start crying when you can focus?
Do you stress over the little things?
Why are you like this?
Is it just part of life?
Is it just part of being a girl?
Is it just because of the people in your life?
They always say life will get better.
But will it really?
Yeah you seem to be doing good, but are you really?
How are you actually feeling?
Mad?
Sad?
Happy?
Normal?
What is normal for a person like you?
Is it normal to cry in your sleep?
Is it normal to fear everyone and everything?
Is it normal to keep things to yourself and no speak your mind?
Is it normal to not speak when you want to?
Do you ever feel emotional?
So emotional that you can put in words but you don't know who to tell?
You can't hide the feelings can you?
You want to let people you are in pain right?
But your brain is telling you to stop telling people.
stop showing your feeling.
Be a rock.
BE NORMAL!
But how can you be normal with these thoughts?
the thing is you can't.
You can't walk the walls without feeling like everyone is watching.
You can't walk home alone without feeling like something bad is going to happen.
You can't focus in class.
You can't be normal no matter how hard you try.
You can buy the newest trends and try to fit in but you can't
Just give up and be yourself.
Feb 6, 2018
Feb 6, 2018 at 12:59 PM UTC
Him
I feel like I was the reason he left
He used to hit my mom
He would even hit his own kids
I thought if I was a good little girl he would stay
I was wrong
I was very wrong
I was only 5 years old when he left
Why did he leave!
Why did I have to happen to me!
I felt abandoned
I still do
It's my biggest fear is to be alone
Yet all I do is sit in my room and cry
Why am I like this
Do I blame him or other things
I'm lost and I don't know what to do or where to go
Maybe this is the only way I can reach out and get help.
I just hate him
I feel like he hated me
He hated my brothers
My sister
My mom
Why did he have to be my dad
Why does this have to be my life
Why did this all happen to me
Jan 1, 2018
Jan 1, 2018 at 12:17 AM UTC