TheNerve - Hello Poetry

I want what I fear Intimacy and cheer even with those I'm near my outside is not clear I won't let them hear my emotions, my tears I glance and I leer I want what I fear drugs and beer off road, won't steer judgement of a peer promises my dear yeah I want what I fear but my actions don't mirror I'm mixed into this sphere I wanna cut and sear but everybody here I love above all else so I promised not to hurt myself When I stopped being so selfish at age 12 that promise I keep and hold deep my loyalty to everybody All of these things are mixed in my sea I'll stray to only the good hopefully cuz if I want one then I shan't do the others son who loves without pain to someone who cuts who can get into drugs with a smile who can express themselves without judgment hitting tile place these thoughts to a pile and pick em out every once in awhile appreciate life and my lifestyle cuz there's nothing better than having somebody to dial and people your willing to die over I imagine kids, a man, I cooking on the stove and stir now my neighbors aint abusers but who's here? my fam and man look weird shaded, crooked, faded, shooked man and I realize where my head gon and steered into the future but I falsely peered I teared while thinking realistically but **** it that's what I really want tempts aint nothing but a taunt if I give in then it'll haunt me and put a tint on my people's hearts so back to the start, I fear this but I'm young and apart with everything I want this part without anymore **** to darken my future this fear is what I want and that's real art.

0

Nov 21, 2016

Nov 21, 2016 at 12:06 PM UTC

I want what I fear

I want what I fear Intimacy and cheer even with those I'm near my outside is not clear I won't let them hear my emotions, my tears I glance and I leer I want what I fear drugs and beer off road, won't steer judgement of a peer promises my dear yeah I want what I fear but my actions don't mirror I'm mixed into this sphere I wanna cut and sear but everybody here I love above all else so I promised not to hurt myself When I stopped being so selfish at age 12 that promise I keep and hold deep my loyalty to everybody All of these things are mixed in my sea I'll stray to only the good hopefully cuz if I want one then I shan't do the others son who loves without pain to someone who cuts who can get into drugs with a smile who can express themselves without judgment hitting tile place these thoughts to a pile and pick em out every once in awhile appreciate life and my lifestyle cuz there's nothing better than having somebody to dial and people your willing to die over I imagine kids, a man, I cooking on the stove and stir now my neighbors aint abusers but who's here? my fam and man look weird shaded, crooked, faded, shooked man and I realize where my head gon and steered into the future but I falsely peered I teared while thinking realistically but **** it that's what I really want tempts aint nothing but a taunt if I give in then it'll haunt me and put a tint on my people's hearts so back to the start, I fear this but I'm young and apart with everything I want this part without anymore **** to darken my future this fear is what I want and that's real art.

43

I'll never be able to finish a song You be the brains and the brawn I'll front like to me you're just a pawn But as soon as everybody's gone And I'm finally alone, I'm drawn, to cry long past dawn 'cause I'm a ***** My self-image tends to ping-pong Whether I'm alright or all wrong I'm giving up on being strong Maybe I should pop a pill or puff a **** I wonder about the sensations all day long I joke and I joke on and on But at the end I stay knowing everything isn't okay Because I shouldn't be scared of my own race I wish I was nothing more than a trace I wish myself not to be a complex being Like everybody else, through night and day My past reflects on who I am today Right now and the past shouldn't be too overwhelming to face Now and the past weren't too bad but yet out of fear I brace My emotions are laced to everybody but I haste to show I actually care but to do so isn't so rare The first time I do is hard to be fair But if I say so I tear I won't trust but I do love and care After I say so I'm uncomfortable and feels as if I'm bare and trapped in the spacious outside without air It feels like you just judge and stare So I'm then scared that you won't stay as I'm stuck there Family are the only people I love, for them I, refrain from trying to die You are my blood, so I'll be **** sure I never again be why you guys cry.

0

Oct 20, 2016

Oct 20, 2016 at 11:46 AM UTC

My Rationale

I'll never be able to finish a song You be the brains and the brawn I'll front like to me you're just a pawn But as soon as everybody's gone And I'm finally alone, I'm drawn, to cry long past dawn 'cause I'm a ***** My self-image tends to ping-pong Whether I'm alright or all wrong I'm giving up on being strong Maybe I should pop a pill or puff a **** I wonder about the sensations all day long I joke and I joke on and on But at the end I stay knowing everything isn't okay Because I shouldn't be scared of my own race I wish I was nothing more than a trace I wish myself not to be a complex being Like everybody else, through night and day My past reflects on who I am today Right now and the past shouldn't be too overwhelming to face Now and the past weren't too bad but yet out of fear I brace My emotions are laced to everybody but I haste to show I actually care but to do so isn't so rare The first time I do is hard to be fair But if I say so I tear I won't trust but I do love and care After I say so I'm uncomfortable and feels as if I'm bare and trapped in the spacious outside without air It feels like you just judge and stare So I'm then scared that you won't stay as I'm stuck there Family are the only people I love, for them I, refrain from trying to die You are my blood, so I'll be **** sure I never again be why you guys cry.

35

I hopped my mental fence Where all faces look bent And I too have dents Where I rid all the drug and cut tempts I'm here now and I **** up the **** scents The real sensations are lent Including the bad that's meant It's here I keep the tempts, away So sober I stay But I want to everyday So I imagine it and lay Imagine what I want to do and say So I dream up things all day With Koto I get to play Throughout the entirety of may But that's as likely as I am to pray Honestly I can't tell if I'm okay And I'll never have to pay So long as I'm strong, nay So long as I'm in my mind In between my head time I find In real life I can stay inline Bc this is the most I can be kind To myself, sincerely signed Nerve.

0

Oct 19, 2016

Oct 19, 2016 at 8:48 PM UTC

Tempts

I hopped my mental fence Where all faces look bent And I too have dents Where I rid all the drug and cut tempts I'm here now and I **** up the **** scents The real sensations are lent Including the bad that's meant It's here I keep the tempts, away So sober I stay But I want to everyday So I imagine it and lay Imagine what I want to do and say So I dream up things all day With Koto I get to play Throughout the entirety of may But that's as likely as I am to pray Honestly I can't tell if I'm okay And I'll never have to pay So long as I'm strong, nay So long as I'm in my mind In between my head time I find In real life I can stay inline Bc this is the most I can be kind To myself, sincerely signed Nerve.

25

I kept it to myself after you Heard about the suicide of Lou Making fun of him was all I used to do I felt bad about myself & needed someone new So I told some kid to step off Remembered his name was Phillip and he had a nasty cough recognized years ago he hadn't been so soft but it didn't matter so I left the loft Decided to put the ***** side on freeze But never actually gotta chance to seize see right after that tease He never showed again you see Gossip traveled over that he had disease Convinced Everything I said turned lethal Low esteem so I popped a pill My parents made me work a lil Never moved out of my parents until They found me getting a refill I blanked forward staring at the windowsill Perhaps my brain was always ill They said that I'm unacceptable If I worked more they let me stay till I was clean and could pay my own bills Fast forward- The story goes onward in my head I always knew I had killed Some pathetic actions made my heart filled Learning the hard way's proof you did some evil. (This was fictional)

0

Oct 18, 2016

Oct 18, 2016 at 5:11 PM UTC

Wasted Lives

I kept it to myself after you Heard about the suicide of Lou Making fun of him was all I used to do I felt bad about myself & needed someone new So I told some kid to step off Remembered his name was Phillip and he had a nasty cough recognized years ago he hadn't been so soft but it didn't matter so I left the loft Decided to put the ***** side on freeze But never actually gotta chance to seize see right after that tease He never showed again you see Gossip traveled over that he had disease Convinced Everything I said turned lethal Low esteem so I popped a pill My parents made me work a lil Never moved out of my parents until They found me getting a refill I blanked forward staring at the windowsill Perhaps my brain was always ill They said that I'm unacceptable If I worked more they let me stay till I was clean and could pay my own bills Fast forward- The story goes onward in my head I always knew I had killed Some pathetic actions made my heart filled Learning the hard way's proof you did some evil. (This was fictional)

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