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Tealeafpanda
29/Non-binary
My Iris died today Her petals fell and blew away Under the moon I lay and weep Holding tight to the memories I keep
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Sep 18, 2022
Sep 18, 2022 at 11:21 PM UTC
August 29
I have a good relationship with death. We handle each other well. And when I get anxiety It’s she who inspires me To take a deep breath and let go.
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Jan 29, 2022
Jan 29, 2022 at 11:28 PM UTC
Relationship with death
Some days you cry because you miss them Some days you cry because you listen To your fears that hold you back It feels like a heart attack You want to succeed But your too afraid to try Too afraid to close your eyes And listen to that lullaby Of solemn sorrow you once knew All too well
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Aug 30, 2021
Aug 30, 2021 at 8:36 PM UTC
Solemn sorrow
My kitchen is yellow Ugly and faded My kitchen is where Late at night I traded Crumbs with a monster A tiny little thing That grows and grows With growls and grumblings She does not like the yellow And neither say do I Sometimes the hideous color Makes her want to cry So I placate her with cookies Brownies and more But my little monster Throws tantrums on the floor No amount of Nutella Can get her off her knees For my little monster Has a minds disease And I’m too busy fighting That I can not see The empty cartons of ice cream Will bring her no true ease
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Jul 22, 2021
Jul 22, 2021 at 5:20 PM UTC
Mimi
I don’t need you to solve my problems Just listen to me while I cry I don’t need you to give your life Just love me when I want to die Give me time to process Give me time to breath Promise that you’ll hold me Promise you won’t leave I just need some time to grieve for The life I lost when I was young I just need some time to grieve for All the songs I’ve left unsung When we wake up in the morning As the sun peaks through the trees The birds sing out their warning As the wind rustles through the leaves I can feel my heart a glowing As you kiss me on the cheek Like a tree I have been growing Of my sorrows let me speak I just need some time to grieve for The life I lost when I was young I just need some time to grieve for All the songs I’ve left unsung When the day is gone And we’re done with the sun Kiss me on my head As I sink into the bed As the sky’s turn red And I’m wishing I was dead You can rock me to sleep With the nightmares I keep And I’ll dream of songs unsung And I’ll dream of songs unsung
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Jul 16, 2021
Jul 16, 2021 at 5:40 PM UTC
Songs Unsung
Would you come for me In my darkest hour? No my heart won't bleed It just turns sour This rotting flesh Inside my chest Only causes pain Turning me insane I saw eyes on every wall I swear I saw you fall Thought you died But you were still alive It was all in my mind Our lives became entwined I don't wanna write about you anymore I'm tired of my heart growing sore Im happy to see you've moved on from me Im ready to let go and let you be But the way you hurt me still aches deep I asked you to come for me in my darkest hour But you pulled away and my heart turned sour I tried to rely on you But you couldn't follow through Clingy, codependent, smothering, decaying goo Sometimes I feel that's all I was to you So now we'll just be friends And that's how the story ends
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Nov 27, 2020
Nov 27, 2020 at 3:50 PM UTC
In My Darkest Hour
We had good *** but that’s about it We argue over text about stupid **** You we’re insecure about your **** I think it made you a ***** Your insecurities Overwhelmed me You’re demons overran you Boy I just couldn’t stand you I don’t wanna see you any more You crashed my car then ****** a ***** I don’t blame her tho This is all on you I dont think you know How the things you do Affect those around  you Like how you ****** that girl in my bed Or how your lies were in everything you never said How you criticized me for wanting to be dead Why don’t you pull the trigger put a bullet through my head Would’ve been better than what you did When you put that cigarette out on my shoulder Looked you in the eyes While I felt it smolder Said it was fine You didn’t commit a crime Cause I wanted it so bad Like you where always mad at me for my loyalty You could never trust You were always tryina bust All you had for me was lust She said you couldn’t have me That made you want me so much Now and then I cringe at how I responded to your touch I was just tryina binge Watch some anime Then you took that away You forced me to cuddle You grabbed my hair Turned me to a puddle Dissociated Comatose baby Protective personalities Malfunctioning realities Could this really be happening I’m watching from the ceiling again That’s not my body this is all pretend Oh Geo, I don’t miss you so I’m so glad to see you go Now I finally have control
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Oct 12, 2020
Oct 12, 2020 at 3:18 PM UTC
I don’t miss you so
September 27th You died today Your life just slipped away Maybe souls exist and I’ll see you again Pretty lies we tell ourselves but it’s all pretend My tethers to this world are growing thin I often wonder why they say suicides a sin The world with out you has grown a little grim I know I need time to grieve But it’s hard when there’s no time to breath
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Sep 29, 2020
Sep 29, 2020 at 3:25 PM UTC
September 27th
Sea green, sea blue all I wanted was to be with you but it was too much you were smothered by my touch I don’t wanna feel the way you made me feel ever again I felt so unwanted, pushed away and haunted by what had been
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Sep 10, 2020
Sep 10, 2020 at 8:53 PM UTC
Sea green. sea blue
His mind was beautiful His poetry was art He made my soul full His sad eyes stole my heart He once was a true love of mine My sun and stars, I was love blind But no longer can I call him mine And no longer does my heart shine
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Aug 25, 2020
Aug 25, 2020 at 9:25 PM UTC
A True Love of Mine