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SparrowJunk
25/M/Milton Keynes "I want to be a writer, or maybe a painter, or maybe both. I'll write a book and draw the pictures. Then maybe people will understand me. I don't know, change things." - Donnie Darko
I let it all out into the corner I shout every word out at me Can't take it any farther Need a dead end to let it be Now I can't Be spending my days this way So I must Find a new way to get paid Now I can't Be simply walking away But I trust I won't be kept like a slave This was written with my head on the table Once again I'm feeling unstable I found inspiration away from the public Where I hide like a suspect Words from on high to continue Through the anger rising There's always another issue It's all so demoralising Now I can't Be spending my days this way So I must Find a new way to get paid Now I can't Be simply walking away But I trust I won't be kept like a slave The things I do to make it through the day Is more than I am willing to say Worker #23 reporting for duty I will break in the newbie Another ten years spent here I keep talking my life away There's nothing more to endear It will end never or today Now I can't Be spending my days this way So I must Find a new way to get paid Now I can't Be simply walking away But I trust I won't be kept like a slave
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Feb 6, 2018
Feb 6, 2018 at 10:11 AM UTC
Worker #23
I felt justified in my actions at the time But you gave a look telling I crossed a line From then on things haven't been the same You give me looks of such fiery disdain I remember stumbling about in the dark I woke up alone in lover's park You weren't there and I probably should've cared But given my actions I thought it was fair This love isn't what it was I know, I know I'm the cause But dear you know it's only because No one taught me better This love is on ice and it's melting away Every day the anger boils to rage There was a time we could fix up the cracks But now we don't know if we want to go back We go to the bar and put people at unease It's never too long before they start to leave We bicker and shout hang our ***** laundry out Not even sure what we're arguing about This love's not going to last Clearly we dived deep too fast But so much time has already passed That we don't know how to end My dear I would love to leave you But I can't stay alone And I'm sorry about what you found That time you looked at my phone From then we spiralled down Arguing late on the road paved with our hate before the car became our coffin in the water's grave Now we're left together in our own private hell But what happens apart we never could tell So we stay with the anger, stay with the hate In the hope that it will eventually abate This love is all we have left My dear I did my very best But getting to feel your breath Keeps me from a worse fate
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Feb 5, 2018
Feb 5, 2018 at 6:10 AM UTC
This Love
Coming back Coming back without a grandstand Coming back from the hinterland Coming back as an old hand I had cast myself aside to focus on new graces Instead placing myself in permanent stasis I had all these grand plans and each one fell through So now I stumble on back down a crumbling avenue Never knew which dream to follow Never knew which pill to swallow Now my words they ring so hollow Now my passions no longer wallow Coming back Coming back to a humble home Coming back to a field to roam Coming back to find one's own The sofa begins to mold itself around my spine As I lay and acting out like it was all of mine Not wanting to address my failures or success Claiming that it was all just part of the process Never knew what I should do Never knew how to carry through Now it happens out the blue Now I need a new point of view Coming back Coming back to build myself Coming back to repair my health Coming back with the cards I dealt Never knew I had it in me Never knew if I could be happy Now I skip the hyperbole Now I give up emotional syncope Coming back Coming back to sing my song Coming back from what was wrong Coming back to live lifelong
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Sep 7, 2017
Sep 7, 2017 at 12:00 PM UTC
Coming Back
The radio's not what it used to be With its wealth based in virtuality Calling out to the youthful dream Which is never quite as it seems The radio no longer plays what's mine As my popular taste has faded in time I stopped singing along to the tunes They stopped making my afternoons The radio is nothing but melodic static I'm aware that sounds a little dramatic But I can't relate to these digital trends No more playlists, I want show host friends The radio's batteries died long ago I'll replace them one day I suppose When the songs I like will play As part of a classic aural wave
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Aug 2, 2017
Aug 2, 2017 at 10:54 AM UTC
The Radio
I spot the small things The giraffe balloon Floating by the window of my bedroom Where I brood on the day I spot the small things The souped up ride Tearing past the street The go faster stripes breaking my concentration I spot the small things The washer of hotels cleaning the distant windows along the parallels As I struggle to work I spot the small things The dead pixel on screen Making the image slightly unseen On your update feed I spot the small things The name on your message With a heart on the end That day was a lesson Not to blindly trust I spot the small things The couple in the corner Kissing away secretly I slowly mourn her You're truly not mine I spot the small things The robin on the wall Serving to remind To be above it all and be more than I am
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Jul 26, 2017
Jul 26, 2017 at 12:06 PM UTC
I Spot The Small Things
I feel my words haven't rung true from the start Because crucially The reality is I was never that good to begin with I only wanted to make some light out of this dark But the emotion is A bloatedness Of my own self-inflated ego and pride I could never call this as an attempt at art Nor should others There are greater wonders By those who can truly inspire But still, I try to play my own small part In this scene Against philistines To fail is never a reason to retire
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Jul 25, 2017
Jul 25, 2017 at 4:56 AM UTC
The Amateur
The cracked screen is staring at me Each line a show of mistakes The black mirror has ruptured And my armour inside breaks From a centre, each hairline starts As the fractures spill further out They can't be brought back in As my core fills with doubt I've turned it into a metaphor It's my own head to blame But it still serves a reminder Of my struggles, of my shame The marks match my arms The dent is in my head I know I'll move past this But I still feel like **** I stare at the cracked screen I will find the solution I have dealt with worse before I can be better than my delusion
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Jul 19, 2017
Jul 19, 2017 at 7:30 AM UTC
Cracked
Stranded without a line to pull me back in time Blinking through snowblind to try and see a sign As I stumble through the snow Where loose footings follow With my panic held in tow I cry out my tears of woe I survived the fall down Tumbling along the ground I don't know if I'll be found This far away from town Taking shelter in the trees Away from the piercing breeze Fashioning my broken skis To take the weight off my knees I'm scared that I'll hear a howl Of a creature most foul Hiding teeth atop its jowl As it seeks me on its prowl Or does something else await? A slow and more frozen fate Now that the day turns late The cold night does not wait I push the thoughts from existence For I must be persistent Or else be gone in an instance Oh, what is that in the distance? I was at the end of my tether As I breathed the brutal aether But I was found in the weather And now we're back together
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Jul 3, 2017
Jul 3, 2017 at 8:44 AM UTC
Snow Walk
A man was standing at the pier's edge No intention of stepping forward but he wasn't going to step back His gaze transfixed on the water, his feet hovering their border He wasn't looking to swim, not with that long coat in black I approached him cautiously As I didn't wish to alarm him or startle him into falling down I knew that he must have a story, one willing to be heard And I was willing to be an audience, to be someone around He turned and spoke to me Please, step no further, this must be my decision to make I appreciate your concern but if there is one thing I've learnt is that good intentions of others make promises easy to break I stopped and he then continued Thank you, I appreciate it and I suppose an explanation is due I may not have had the worst of lives but nor have I had the best But I did have a long life, which is more than others will get He turned to face me His coat was flailing in the wind and underneath he wore a suit It was well worn but not shabby and his shoes needed a shine But he was ordinary as if this walk was part of his commute Smiling he told me I know, I know, it's not what you expected when you saw me I haven't just lost my job, it's not that kind of simple story I just woke up and wondered if this was all there is to reality I've had my highs and I've had my lows Nothing different to what everyone knows, but that led me here If nothing new is to come, am I happy to stop with all I've had Or shall I keep going and just see what will appear He asked me to leave after that I protested but I understood it was his choice to make alone I reluctantly turned and slowly walked further and further away I wondered if I would even hear if his soul would part the waves
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Jun 26, 2017
Jun 26, 2017 at 11:26 AM UTC
The Man On The Pier
A man was standing at the pier's edge No intention of stepping forward but he wasn't going to step back His gaze transfixed on the water, his feet hovering their border He wasn't looking to swim, not with that long coat in black I approached him cautiously As I didn't wish to alarm him or startle him into falling down I knew that he must have a story, one willing to be heard And I was willing to be an audience, to be someone around He turned and spoke to me Please, step no further, this must be my decision to make I appreciate your concern but if there is one thing I've learnt is that good intentions of others make promises easy to break I stopped and he then continued Thank you, I appreciate it and I suppose an explanation is due I may not have had the worst of lives but nor have I had the best But I did have a long life, which is more than others will get He turned to face me His coat was flailing in the wind and underneath he wore a suit It was well worn but not shabby and his shoes needed a shine But he was ordinary as if this walk was part of his commute Smiling he told me I know, I know, it's not what you expected when you saw me I haven't just lost my job, it's not that kind of simple story I just woke up and wondered if this was all there is to reality I've had my highs and I've had my lows Nothing different to what everyone knows, but that led me here If nothing new is to come, am I happy to stop with all I've had Or shall I keep going and just see what will appear He asked me to leave after that I protested but I understood it was his choice to make alone I reluctantly turned and slowly walked further and further away I wondered if I would even hear if his soul would part the waves
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Music brought me into this world It only grew during childhood To be something important to me To hear voices who understood The words they reach me The words they teach me The beats they fill me The beats they thrill me I think of all the people I've met Only to be never seen again We had bonded over talks of music Getting excited by the hits of then The rhythm it takes us The rhythm it makes us The melody it soothes us The melody it moves us I have the discs I have the tapes I have the audio escapes I have the files I have the streams I have the digitalised dreams I have the music The music has me I find that it's never enough now Always trying to find the hidden gem Finding the old hearing the new Living my life by the rpm The chants I will speak The chants I will repeat The encores we demand Encore we want the band I have the discs I have the tapes I have the audio escapes I have the files I have the streams I have the digitalised dreams I have the music The music has me
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Jun 22, 2017
Jun 22, 2017 at 4:37 AM UTC
I Have The Music