Honestly?
I don't know, I love the thought of having someone there for me if I need them, of having someone I can talk to and grow with as a person.
But I love my freedom,
I love being able to act without thinking.
I love waking up with someone in my arms and then happily living a normal life with them. But I cannot simply sit idly by and not do anything. I'm a free spirit at heart, an adventurer, there's so much to do and I want to do that with someone, but I need an adventurer to do that with.
Mar 24, 2020
Mar 24, 2020 at 4:52 AM UTC
For the last week I was looking forward to seeing her again.
Because when I see her, I fall in love all over again.
I can look at her smile and see the light.
For the last week I was hoping I could hold her and ignore the world.
Because when I hold her, I can do anything.
I can take on the world and win.
For the last week I was longing to kiss her,
Because when I kiss her, the world vanishes.
It is just me and her, and I don't have to worry.
For the last week I was waiting to be near her.
Because when I'm near her, I feel safe.
No harm can come to me.
For the last week I was dreaming of hearing her.
Because when I listen to her, no music can compare.
I can lose myself in her voice and never want it to stop.
For the last week I was wishing to annoy her.
Because when she complains she has the most beautiful grin.
I can smirk knowing the response and waiting for it.
What's three more weeks of waiting?
Mar 24, 2020
Mar 24, 2020 at 4:11 AM UTC
I could tell you a story of a girl I loved.
A story so beautiful that you'll question the truth.
A story of love, lust and passion.
A beauty, walking on earth like a fallen Angel.
The days we spent, side by side, hand in hand.
Kissing her lips, with vicious hunger, dragging hands through messy hair, falling back onto stained sheets.
I can also tell you a story of a man who lied,
Who danced the dance of deception.
A man who stood, head held high as he took a final bow,
Kissed her on the cheek and left,
To dance with the next, until nothing of the truth is left.
I could tell you a story,
If I had the chance,
However the music is starting,
Do you care to dance?
Oct 2, 2018
Oct 2, 2018 at 3:31 PM UTC
You deserve all the stars in the sky and every precious gem,
you deserve someone who will let you and help you grow.
you deserve someone who is going to be there in all the good and the bad,
who will spend nights holding you, just because you felt bad in an attempt to cheer you up.
You deserve every howl of the wind, every drop of rain, every ray of sun, and the first snow of every year.
You deserve the world,
But no one could ever give it to you,
Because that would mean they'd have to give you up,
Because if you saw what you were worth, you wouldn't want them anymore
No one could ever deserve as much because they wouldn't be the person that I sat up till 1 in the morning for 2 years of my life.
They wouldn't be the girl who heard all of my worst bits and stuck around.
They wouldn't be the girl who makes me smile and groan in frustration almost every day.
They wouldn't be the girl that encouraged me to be me and recklous.
They wouldn't be the girl that for so so long I wanted to be a permanent part of my life.
They couldn't deserve any of that because they wouldn't be you.
Aug 18, 2018
Aug 18, 2018 at 7:47 AM UTC
Can I hard reset?
Restore to factory settings?
Set to default?
Can I go back to before I met you,
When we were just kids?
Just so I can fall in love with you again,
But can we make it work?
Or at least give it a try?
If that doesn't work we can go our separate ways,
Uninstall the relationship,
Disable heart.ios
Because app requited love isn't compatible with this device
But would it be worth it for the same error message as before?
Error: file.unrequitedlove cannot be disabled
Aug 10, 2018
Aug 10, 2018 at 3:31 PM UTC
I'm sorry for all that was said and done.
Truth be told, drunks and phones shouldn't mix, I'll attest to that.
The later stages of being drunk lead to some very interesting confessions,
***** secrets spilled to open air,
If only someone would hear this drunken fool.
Confessions of words once whispered and missed chances,
Hidden feelings, and imaginary romances.
Words I might've ate, instead I would over contemplate.
Thinking about how I could never stand a chance.
But no one wants to hear this sober fool.
The outdoor type, was you to a T, never meant for me.
I can put up a tent, start a fire and that's about it.
I thought it was great, a small bit of your attention was all it took,
to teach me something not in a book.
But who's listening to this lying fool.
A bombers moon and the stars, I'd pick them over nights at bars,
Even if it were just to reminisce about a night we shared.
Hours walking to clear my head,
Of things that your friend twice said.
Yes, this confession of a regretful fool.
I'm sorry for all that was said and done,
For not saying at the time, but I've missed my chance,
I would bet on that with my last dime.
But I had to say, and I've got to know,
Did you maybe want to grab a coffee to go?
Jul 24, 2018
Jul 24, 2018 at 3:27 AM UTC
I wonder, do you ever sit back and think?
About what we were and what we had?
What we lost?
Do you ever see my name and wonder,
How I’m doing? What’s going on in life?
Do you ever wonder what would have happened?
What could have happened had it not been ruined?
Had I kept my mouth shut,
And followed you like I promised?
I wonder if you see me out, happy and smiling,
And if it breaks your heart like it does mine?
I wonder if you ever felt anything or was it all a lie?
Did you really love me or...?
I sit up at night and wonder,
Did I mean as much to you as you did to me?
Jul 7, 2018
Jul 7, 2018 at 6:20 PM UTC
I didn't find myself,
I just shut myself away because I was the youngest kid and everyone looked down at me.
I just want my space, I wanna sit in my own place,
with book and a fire,
for once I'd like to not cry myself to sleep, or wake up feeling numb.
For once I'd like to know what's it's like to know who I am.
For once I'd like to wake up
and not have to consciously remind myself that I have things to do.
I'd like to wake up not feeling tired.
I'd for once like to wake up and be glad that I have.
Just once, just once I'd like to meet a girl, go on a few dates,
and actually fall in love with a total stranger,
not someone I spent time working out their issues
and then helping them.
Because then they'll only ever see me as their solutions.
Just once I'd like to grab a coffee with someone and talk about the world with them.
Just once I'd like to feel that I'm not alone, I'd like to be normal.
Jun 26, 2018
Jun 26, 2018 at 6:59 PM UTC
The real fairy tale life
Christmas eve, cuddled up with blankets and homemade hot chocolate (it's chocolatier and creamier than normal hot chocolate) and marshmallows, with a stupid old chick-flick that you've watched every year for the last 10 years, because it's become your tradition, and then putting the kids to bed early and hiding their presents and getting everything ready for them, because even though you'll be tired all day it's worth it to see them smile.
Going to the grandparents and the in-laws on boxing day because Christmas day is your day with the family, and having fun, playing board games because you can't beat the classics, sitting down for a dinner and laughing at ****** ******* jokes.
And then when the kids fall asleep, loading them into the car and going home, ready to go back to work the next day, because you work a full time job just to support your family to make sure they're never missing anything. Only to get ready for new years eve and partying the night away with your friends before escaping to kiss at midnight...
That's the real fairy tale life, not the marrying royalty and becoming a princess but marrying the one you love and starting a family, because not everything has to be perfect, just as long as you're together
May 21, 2018
May 21, 2018 at 4:59 AM UTC
I have often pondered the reason for existence
We're here one day and gone the next, Just a whisker
from disappearing,
Is it really such a short distance?
To be birthed and brought to death,
To be made and broken,
Created and destroyed,
In a matter of moments
I have often pondered the reason for existence,
We're here one day and gone the next,
Just a whisker
from disappearing,
Is it really such a short distance?
But a moment can be all it takes,
A heartbeat of a second,
A kiss, innocent and chaste,
A strike, cruel and vicious
A tear shed by a lonely eye
A moment can be all it takes,
A heartbeat of a second,
Faster than you can blink
Quicker than a hummingbirds wings
A moment to make your mark
I have often pondered the reason for existence,
We're here one day and gone the next,
Just a whisker from disappearing,
Is it really such a short distance?
Bridged by the moments that define us.
The reasons for existence?
Dec 29, 2017
Dec 29, 2017 at 6:46 PM UTC