I'm so scared.
Why me?
When will it finally stop?
How am I really supposed to feel?
Where must I look to truly find it?
WHY!?
...
~S.C.Kelley
Jan 26, 2019
Jan 26, 2019 at 10:17 PM UTC
Love is like nicotine.
Once you've tried it once, you can't get enough.
You say you can live without it.
But you know you're lying to yourself.
That's why heartbreak physically hurts.
The way withdrawals physically hurt.
It makes you sick to your stomach.
You say it's the last time.
But it's not.
It's the final act, for now.
You can try to take a long break from it.
But it always comes slithering back.
Like a shadow you can't hide from.
You can't stop thinking about it.
You sit through your normal life.
Thinking about when your next fix is.
It fills your lungs and makes you feel good.
But shortly after you feel it in your stomach.
Like a poison slowly killing you.
Nicotine is like love.
~S.C.Kelley
Jan 26, 2019
Jan 26, 2019 at 9:47 PM UTC
I think you take my breath away.
People always say that as an endearing thing.
But I think you actually physically take my breath away.
I don't know how.
Maybe it was when you layed your head on my chest.
Or tangled your fingers with mine.
Or felt safe enough to drift off to sleep in my arms.
All I know is that I think you take my breath away.
I just wish I was surer of you.
Because I want that feeling for eternity.
But I don't think you are my eternity.
~S.C.Kelley
Jan 26, 2019
Jan 26, 2019 at 9:23 PM UTC
You make me feel like the man I've always aspired to be,
And the little, scared kid I used to always be.
At first, I wasn't sure,
Too much running through my head.
But once we were there on your couch,
Sharing warmth and asylum.
My heart raced like it hadn't in years,
My mind going a thousand miles an hour.
Once you fit your hands in mine,
And curled up beside me.
It felt safe and natural,
Like we had been here before.
Your genuine smile and cute laugh,
At every terrible joke I made.
Your smell remained on my left shoulder sleeve,
And your phantom fingers softly brushing.
It all felt natural.
It all felt right.
At least for tonight.
~S.C.Kelley
Jan 26, 2019
Jan 26, 2019 at 3:17 AM UTC
Skin like flowing flames
Eyes like infernos
Lips that make you spill every drop of your desires
Soft sharp fingers brushing sins into your soul
A voice like boiling honey
Promises of wild fantasies
Contracts in blood
All tricks of the Devil himself
~S.C. Kelley
Jan 2, 2019
Jan 2, 2019 at 12:12 AM UTC
How do you put such profound emotions into words?
Do you paint them onto the page like a gentle brush swooping and sliding?
Do you shout them from the stage into an audience of frightened eyes?
Do you quickly write them down with a stern ballpoint scratching into blank paper?
Do you whisper them softly into curious ears with gentle and intimate intention?
Do you scream them at your memories till your throat burns?
Or do you silently stare at the sky and think them into the abyss?
~S.C. Kelley
Oct 28, 2018
Oct 28, 2018 at 6:46 PM UTC
Don't.
Don't get coffee.
Don't kiss her.
Don't fall in love.
Don't think about her every moment.
Don't let those blue eyes pierce your soul like they have time and time again.
Don't let those lips poison your mind with the stinging venom of her serpent heartstrings.
Don't do it again expecting something to change with a happily ever after.
Don't convince yourself that you're done falling.
Don't think for a second it's over.
Don't forget it's just starting again.
Don't.
Fool yourself.
Don't
Fall in love.
Don't
Kiss her.
Don't
Get coffee.
Don't Assume
This time
Is
The last time.
Oct 28, 2018
Oct 28, 2018 at 2:09 AM UTC
The Kiss
Poison
Long lasting
Stinging
Loveliness.
A moment
Lasting
Forever
Yet
So quick.
Hearts
Beating
Throbbing
Fluttering.
Lips
Tangled
Locked
Harmonizing.
Minds
Fuzzy
Confused
Yet
definite.
Bodies
Warm
Close
Touching.
Memories
Existant
Looming
Forgotten.
The Kiss
~S.C. Kelley
Oct 28, 2018
Oct 28, 2018 at 1:49 AM UTC
My eyes bleed with exhaustion.
My thoughts are fuzzy like my brain is stuffed with styrofoam.
My body sinks into the ugly carpet floor of my basement.
My mouth tastes sour with the flavor of an unslept soul.
I lie here writing instead of sleeping because it feels like the only thing I can do well, consciously.
My back aches with an elders pain at late seventeen.
I crave the warm embrace of my bed but am too stuck like sap to move.
I'm rambling here in my brain instead of resting my frigid existence.
My thoughts are slow and choppy now with the hesitation of drifty words.
My rusted, chipping ears hear nothing but silence and a distant coo-coo clock.
The chirps of a bird only found in my dark, dusty insanity.
The world weighs upon children such as these in a universe such as this.
I'm just, tired. Tired...
~S.C. Kelley
Oct 5, 2018
Oct 5, 2018 at 2:01 AM UTC
Why is it that when I start to feel alive,
It feels like the wrong thing to do?
Why is it that I am convinced that I don't deserve the greatness I'm gifted?
Why is it that the warmth I feel is always quickly faded and frozen?
Why is it that when it feels like the final victory, the war is just beginning?
Why is it that I am secretly the monster I swore to despise?
~S.C. Kelley
Oct 4, 2018
Oct 4, 2018 at 11:12 PM UTC