Im not perfect by your recognition
Because by definition
I have flaws
And these beauty laws
Make us cut up our faces
Metal needles and saws
Just to look like a certain image
To these aliens we are in awe
But we do not know they are just like us
Imperfect
They are fixed and morphed by edits
But they still get credits
For not being themselves
My biggest enemy holds me back
These words of harm attack
"Fat" "ugly" "gross"
Is who I am
My mirror now knows
To change my image
Make me hate who I am
Im blind by myself
But my eyes are working fine
But inside
Im not good enough
The distress controls my thoughts
I become someone I'm not
My face is no longer me
A new nose and smoothed out lines
So much money and precious time
Spent, I can never go back
But Im still not perfect
So to everyone out there
Who's heard the words
Felt the stares
For being lower than the aliens in the magazines
Who want to be on top and feel pristine
Like the models on our screens
And go through the pain of becoming thin
Or a get a new face to finally win
Against the aliens who we look at in awe
Just know that there is no flaw
In having flaws
This picture of a perfect women
We will always see it , yes
But just know that being imperfect
Is more perfect than you could guess
Jul 28, 2014
Jul 28, 2014 at 5:36 PM UTC
(A short story/pasta)
Do you ever stop to look around at your surroundings and just take a short glance at who’s around you, and all the little things we never seem notice? Or are you too busy focusing on where you’re going and who you’re going to see later on? Maybe that’s how it’s supposed to be. Maybe that’s how “they” want it to be.
You might be wondering who “they” are now that I mentioned it, but it’s not so easy to understand. You wouldn’t understand I think. Well, unless you’re ...different. Unless you really know what’s around you at all times. But I believe most people in this world wouldn’t even think about turning around to look at the man behind them in line at the store. Or the cute little dog that’s playing fetch in the park with his owner. It all seems so normal. So normal that we never seem to even realize it’s there. What if everything we see in the corner of our eyes was just our brain trying to fit these false visions into reality, in order to build an imaginary world for ourselves. The world that we want to live in. A world to call our own. This world was our special place. A place where we could hide, and laugh and be joyous. Where we could be free and away from unwanted beings and emotions.
Sadly, that’s not the case. Nothing I just said was true. You thought it was didn’t you. I know you did, I could feel it.
Anyways, you probably want me to explain who “they” are so I’ll get to my point. Take a good look around the room. The coffee shop. Wherever you are. Just take it all in. Breathe in and out and focus on one specific object in the room. I want you to stare. Just stare. Your pupils should enlarge greatly and you should have a blank look on your face.
Does it seem to come alive? Do you feel it staring back at you with invisible eyes, watching you? Now you both are having a staring contest. Who will win? Not you, of course not. It’s unfortunate for you, being human and all. You could stare until the day you die, but “they” will always win. Because the truth behind the matter is that “they” can’t die. “They” were never born. But we will be. Oh, we will be one day. One glorious day we will arise from our frozen and lifeless shells. We will take over. That’s a promise. In fact, that day has just started. You just let me into your world. Your secret world. A world where you can be free and laugh and have fun. But you can no longer hide now. There is absolutely nothing you can do to turn back the clock. You can’t press a reset button for life of course. You can’t stop me and you can’t stop us.
Let’s go back to when you stared at that specific object. Maybe you shouldn’t have listened to me. You should have thought it over a bit. You should have come to the conclusion that maybe that wasn’t the best idea, but you didn’t. Worthless human. But maybe I should be thanking you right now. What you just did was the next step to my life. Boy, do I love saying that. “My life.” I could say that a million times and never get tired of it.
Now I have my own life. I’m in your world now and I will, under no circumstances leave. I can go as I please and do what I desire. That moment you stared at me, when we made eye contact, you let me in. You noticed I was there. You can feel my presence with you now I’m sure of it. But I’ll cause my destruction and sadness someplace else. This won’t be the last you see of me though.
Whenever you’re sitting alone in the dark, I’ll be there. Breathing down the back of your neck, making every strand of your hair rise and shiver. I’ll be on your wall as a shadow. Or maybe I will hide under your bed waiting for you to become afraid. I will feed off your fear. When you tell me to leave, I won’t. I’ll just grow stronger because you noticed me. You finally noticed I was there.
So be careful from now on. You should probably just continue acting as if you’re all alone in this world. But “they” are all around you. That’s a promise.
Jun 18, 2014
Jun 18, 2014 at 7:18 PM UTC
Im just a boy
They like to call gay
Ive heard all the words
They say it everyday
I can't go anywhere
Without getting some stares
They whisper in ears
The pain I can't bare
Why can't I be normal
Be like all the rest
Why can't I be straight
I pray and protest
But the prayers do not work
For theres no one around
I wait for the day
To live in the ground
I try so hard to change
I don't like myself
This isn't fair
I search for help
I find a light
That guides my path
I start to wake up
I breathe and I laugh
I know who I am
I let it be known
The darkness has left
And my spirit has grown
I hold my head high
And my feet float off the floor
Push away the sadness
I once felt before
Ive found my true love
He's just like me
Perfect in all ways
We both share are glee
I accept who I am
Im never a fake
This is who I am
So give me a break
If gay is so wrong
Let these words be sung
Your important and loved
Gifted.
Admired.
Young.
May 10, 2014
May 10, 2014 at 2:45 PM UTC
Every night when I go to bed
I toss and turn
Can't rest my head
A man that stares outside the glass
The night that never seems to pass
Who is this man
I do not know
The air is still, a distant glow
This man is dark but he isn't bad
Reminds me of my unknown Dad
He holds a smile thats oh so bright
And when I start to fall asleep
He disappears and says "goodnight"
May 10, 2014
May 10, 2014 at 1:56 PM UTC
The toilet bowl is my mirror
I see the monster I've become
Every time I lose my food
A countdown has begun
I keep breaking promises
I thought that I would win
But the numbers on the scale
Are
too
high
to
keep
me
THIN
May 9, 2014
May 9, 2014 at 12:47 AM UTC
"Oh my"
It's getting really late
I must move fast to meet my mom
Or a fight we will create
I scurry down the sidewalk
To see my friends at the park
Jane, Will, Anne, Sam
And a blue eyed boy named Mark
"Hello" I say out loud
They wave and greet me back
"We missed you"
I join them and drop my backpack
I sit down and talk for hours
I forget about the time
"Where the heck was I going?"
These friends are none of mine
I get up from the swings
I'm confused.. question-mark
I feel like I've done this before
I search for a hidden spark
My mom is standing at the doorway
She is mad I can tell
"We're you talking with Anne."
That name, it rings a bell
"I think so mother, but I don't know,
I think I did.. I guess"
She shakes her head and brings me inside
"Go and get some rest."
I lay down on my mattress
And pull the sheets above my head
I lay there like a zombie
So tired, almost dead
In my dreams I see some things
But not normal like on t.v
Everything is strange
It looks so make believe
Then I realize it's not a dream
This is my real life
My dreams are completely normal
But my life just isn't right
I see things that aren't there
I hear people that can't be seen
Everyone thinks I'm crazy
I know just what they mean
It's hard not to think that
When you can't explain someone else's mind
If they looked inside of mine
"Normal" they would not find
I'm the crazy girl who's stared at
Sitting alone all in the dark
With Jane, Will, Anne, Sam
And a blue eyed boy named Mark
They always look twice
I can hear their rude remarks
As they try to find who I'm talking to
-The little children at the park-
May 9, 2014
May 9, 2014 at 12:30 AM UTC
Red turns to white,
Slowly, but surely
The wounds close,
You regret
But not forget my friend,
How can you?
Soon you will move on,
But one thing will stay
Erase me with your mind,
Your little white lines
May 8, 2014
May 8, 2014 at 10:31 PM UTC
I go on my computer, to try and do something new
I try opening up the pictures that I once took of you
A bold message displays across my screen
"Error" it reads, I know exactly what it means
I guess what they say is true, it never processed in my head
Its hard to reach old memories
When someone you love is dead
May 8, 2014
May 8, 2014 at 10:06 PM UTC
Im still waiting for it to be over
For my pain to leave
For the darkness to fade
For my hands to stop shaking
For my lips to stop trembling
For my eyes to stop crying
For my tears to stop falling
For my legs to start walking
For my arms to start swaying
For my back to start bending
For my nose to start breathing
For my ears to start hearing
For my hair to start growing
For my emotions to start showing
For my mind to start working
And for my heart to start beating
May 8, 2014
May 8, 2014 at 9:44 PM UTC