QSaint - Hello Poetry

I knew from the first moment that you would not stay Were tragedies like hurricanes in need of a name Instead of breakfast and silence (both of which I am bad at in different ways) I might've asked you for... Anything at all, perhaps. Having done what never appealed much to me I made a chance meeting something disgusting Bled on an altar requiring only burnt offerings Sang hymnals at a vigil with silence surrounding Thank the heavens you had sense enough to leave early Now there are no dishes in the sink, just rumpled sheets beside me And a meltdown to reheat that will keep for another morning And there's work to be done, but I've grown a talent for fake coughing And putting off the hard and easy things unless they come knocking The devil in the details is that I've been looking There is nothing extraordinary in the trash or burnt-out hallway light The smile for the day is long exhausted by night And I am just like everyone else who is just like How unbearable to be alone and know that it is right You will not watch the TV, so I do not buy it There is a yearning within me that only comes alive when Something living finds my caricature of thoughtless happiness But it crumbles under scrutiny and all that is left is: This same empty room by a freshly cleaned bath And a pile of unfolded clothes, and three friendly cats And a refridgerator full of ingredients— never snacks And a note under the fridge magnet, "I'll be back."

0

1d ago

Jun 2, 2026 at 12:38 PM UTC

A Morning After

I knew from the first moment that you would not stay Were tragedies like hurricanes in need of a name Instead of breakfast and silence (both of which I am bad at in different ways) I might've asked you for... Anything at all, perhaps. Having done what never appealed much to me I made a chance meeting something disgusting Bled on an altar requiring only burnt offerings Sang hymnals at a vigil with silence surrounding Thank the heavens you had sense enough to leave early Now there are no dishes in the sink, just rumpled sheets beside me And a meltdown to reheat that will keep for another morning And there's work to be done, but I've grown a talent for fake coughing And putting off the hard and easy things unless they come knocking The devil in the details is that I've been looking There is nothing extraordinary in the trash or burnt-out hallway light The smile for the day is long exhausted by night And I am just like everyone else who is just like How unbearable to be alone and know that it is right You will not watch the TV, so I do not buy it There is a yearning within me that only comes alive when Something living finds my caricature of thoughtless happiness But it crumbles under scrutiny and all that is left is: This same empty room by a freshly cleaned bath And a pile of unfolded clothes, and three friendly cats And a refridgerator full of ingredients— never snacks And a note under the fridge magnet, "I'll be back."

27

I imagine your hands dwarfing someone else's and the image puts something bitter on the back of my tongue I imagine you sweeping back hair that doesn't curl rebelliously at your fingers, insisting your hand stay with them Words wet with dismay stick to my dry throat and if I could cough them out thered be nothing but different configurations of "stay" I imagine your lips covering some spectre of a woman who is not me and I am amazed by the vastness of my hate I remember the warmth of your chest as you pressed into my side, crowded me to the table, and my heart leapt into my throat I couldn't think past awareness of you, felt you down my spine and into my shoes That little was enough to do to leave me gasping I'd be frigid if I insisted I could ever do without it I remember kissing the mouthpiece of a roll and inhaling acrid smoke and you pressed the tip of your spliff to my lips before I had finished coughing and Chased smoke like it was an ever-distant horizon vanishing into my chest I am a ruined woman, stuck dreaming and waiting, there's humiliation that comes with this sort of infatuation You get me tense, keep me constantly on the precipice of something, torso dangling over a railing, always threatening the possibility of free fall I can hardly deal with my day to day humanity, the depravity you spark is beyond me and my meager means of processing You look at me and I feel distinctly underdressed, publicly indecent, unnecessarily yearning as though I've never once known decorum I fumble as I rarely do, trip over words like they're untied shoes, and my heart is imprinted under the press of your thumb I've caught myself often wondering if I am merely imagining the heat of the summer and I am roasting in your company My skin oversensitive, my heart aches with fresh burns, but when you leave I freeze and claw you back to me The way that my mind, ever caterwauling, overthinking, shaking is so immediately quiet and still to give your voice room That the world narrows to a point and the buzz of reality fades and I can focus on you That the fear I cradle is smothered by the weight of your consideration There's so much that qualifies as perfection that its unfamiliarity makes me consider running from whatever it is brewing between you and me.

0

Sep 6, 2020

Sep 6, 2020 at 2:37 AM UTC

Monday Morning Medium Roast

I imagine your hands dwarfing someone else's and the image puts something bitter on the back of my tongue I imagine you sweeping back hair that doesn't curl rebelliously at your fingers, insisting your hand stay with them Words wet with dismay stick to my dry throat and if I could cough them out thered be nothing but different configurations of "stay" I imagine your lips covering some spectre of a woman who is not me and I am amazed by the vastness of my hate I remember the warmth of your chest as you pressed into my side, crowded me to the table, and my heart leapt into my throat I couldn't think past awareness of you, felt you down my spine and into my shoes That little was enough to do to leave me gasping I'd be frigid if I insisted I could ever do without it I remember kissing the mouthpiece of a roll and inhaling acrid smoke and you pressed the tip of your spliff to my lips before I had finished coughing and Chased smoke like it was an ever-distant horizon vanishing into my chest I am a ruined woman, stuck dreaming and waiting, there's humiliation that comes with this sort of infatuation You get me tense, keep me constantly on the precipice of something, torso dangling over a railing, always threatening the possibility of free fall I can hardly deal with my day to day humanity, the depravity you spark is beyond me and my meager means of processing You look at me and I feel distinctly underdressed, publicly indecent, unnecessarily yearning as though I've never once known decorum I fumble as I rarely do, trip over words like they're untied shoes, and my heart is imprinted under the press of your thumb I've caught myself often wondering if I am merely imagining the heat of the summer and I am roasting in your company My skin oversensitive, my heart aches with fresh burns, but when you leave I freeze and claw you back to me The way that my mind, ever caterwauling, overthinking, shaking is so immediately quiet and still to give your voice room That the world narrows to a point and the buzz of reality fades and I can focus on you That the fear I cradle is smothered by the weight of your consideration There's so much that qualifies as perfection that its unfamiliarity makes me consider running from whatever it is brewing between you and me.

21

There are words in a million languages That pass between our eyes alone They piece themselves together in my mind And rest on the tip of my tongue Was it just the whiskey talking? Every word you said sounded like *** Was it just the liquor talking? Was I just a bit of fun? Because I know better than to trust or lean I’m far too smart to count on you for anything I know not to bother with vulnerabilities So why did soft words from you instantly break me? I don’t lean into arms in the dark of night And suddenly feel that I can breathe I don’t hold to anyone for any reason And momentarily feel my mind freeze But it was quiet for a second, it was silent There were no hands on my neck, nothing violent It was bliss for a second, I was peaceful Like I’d gone to bed starved and woke up full But I’m needy at my most honest I need someone to hold me together I could fix myself if I wanted But I’m too tired to bother I’m jealous at my most real I’ll wrap around you like gauze I’ll watch you be you with a smile While hoping the whole world ***** off I’ll sit with you like this With the words you whisper down my neck I told you I’d never been honest before So please, don’t leave me a mess

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Sep 22, 2018

Sep 22, 2018 at 6:49 PM UTC

Deafening Silences

There are words in a million languages That pass between our eyes alone They piece themselves together in my mind And rest on the tip of my tongue Was it just the whiskey talking? Every word you said sounded like *** Was it just the liquor talking? Was I just a bit of fun? Because I know better than to trust or lean I’m far too smart to count on you for anything I know not to bother with vulnerabilities So why did soft words from you instantly break me? I don’t lean into arms in the dark of night And suddenly feel that I can breathe I don’t hold to anyone for any reason And momentarily feel my mind freeze But it was quiet for a second, it was silent There were no hands on my neck, nothing violent It was bliss for a second, I was peaceful Like I’d gone to bed starved and woke up full But I’m needy at my most honest I need someone to hold me together I could fix myself if I wanted But I’m too tired to bother I’m jealous at my most real I’ll wrap around you like gauze I’ll watch you be you with a smile While hoping the whole world ***** off I’ll sit with you like this With the words you whisper down my neck I told you I’d never been honest before So please, don’t leave me a mess

33

So this journey has come to an end Whether you don’t know me at all Or think of me as your best friend This is my goodbye, my final call. Thank you for the adventure; thank you for your time. I have nothing left to give, no words left to rhyme. This is my last, I’ll leave with a whisper. This is all I have, what I began writing for. Should you ever neeed a shoulder, please find me. No matter where I go in life, where you need me is where I’ll be. Hold me tightly in your thoughts and I will hold you in my heart. Merry meet, dear rhymers, and merry part.

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Dec 21, 2017

Dec 21, 2017 at 8:13 PM UTC

My Last Poem

So this journey has come to an end Whether you don’t know me at all Or think of me as your best friend This is my goodbye, my final call. Thank you for the adventure; thank you for your time. I have nothing left to give, no words left to rhyme. This is my last, I’ll leave with a whisper. This is all I have, what I began writing for. Should you ever neeed a shoulder, please find me. No matter where I go in life, where you need me is where I’ll be. Hold me tightly in your thoughts and I will hold you in my heart. Merry meet, dear rhymers, and merry part.

7

As to take my hands And break every single bone If you'd only be so kind Take my heart and leave me alone But don't touch my mind My body is yours to harm But if you'd be so kind Please, leave me my mind. My age may harm me in eighty years And you may still peel my skin from muscle But if you would show me a kindness I swear I wouldn't struggle. Death doesn't scare me Neither does pain I can take on the world With little more than my brain. I'm liable to survive Through what I'm put through Then come back with a vengance And rip the heart out of you. So you may hurt me now Go ahead, be my guest But if you leave me alive I'll have your last breath.

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Dec 21, 2017

Dec 21, 2017 at 8:10 PM UTC

If You'd Be So Kind

As to take my hands And break every single bone If you'd only be so kind Take my heart and leave me alone But don't touch my mind My body is yours to harm But if you'd be so kind Please, leave me my mind. My age may harm me in eighty years And you may still peel my skin from muscle But if you would show me a kindness I swear I wouldn't struggle. Death doesn't scare me Neither does pain I can take on the world With little more than my brain. I'm liable to survive Through what I'm put through Then come back with a vengance And rip the heart out of you. So you may hurt me now Go ahead, be my guest But if you leave me alive I'll have your last breath.

24

I've never believed you could absorb someone's energy But I'd like to try it with you. Open a vein, slit an artery Drink you blood, your essence, through. I want to crack your skull, delicately, thinly See the wonders that brain of yours hides I want to open your chest, rip your ribs apart And study the workings of your insides.

0

Dec 21, 2017

Dec 21, 2017 at 8:09 PM UTC

Bloodthirst

I've never believed you could absorb someone's energy But I'd like to try it with you. Open a vein, slit an artery Drink you blood, your essence, through. I want to crack your skull, delicately, thinly See the wonders that brain of yours hides I want to open your chest, rip your ribs apart And study the workings of your insides.

8

It feels something like leaning over The top of a tall building and staring down At all the people who are and will do The things I could but rather wouldn't Perhaps it's the introduction of happiness That's robbed my ability to express in words When I am no longer feeling content And can only reach for poetry as an outlet.

0

Dec 21, 2017

Dec 21, 2017 at 8:08 PM UTC

Stagnation

It feels something like leaning over The top of a tall building and staring down At all the people who are and will do The things I could but rather wouldn't Perhaps it's the introduction of happiness That's robbed my ability to express in words When I am no longer feeling content And can only reach for poetry as an outlet.

8

At the very least, I am aware of my regression I find myself grasping for the pillars of my past To ground me in the torrential rains and floods I reached for a cigarette and it fixed nothing at all I reached for the knife and it settled me for a moment I reached for the religion that alienated me and my family Within the music I used to listen to I found peace. I found tears I hadn't realized I needed to shed. And though the teachings are still to raw to read I latched to the pillar of religion and it once calmed me.

0

Dec 21, 2017

Dec 21, 2017 at 8:07 PM UTC

Self-Defense

At the very least, I am aware of my regression I find myself grasping for the pillars of my past To ground me in the torrential rains and floods I reached for a cigarette and it fixed nothing at all I reached for the knife and it settled me for a moment I reached for the religion that alienated me and my family Within the music I used to listen to I found peace. I found tears I hadn't realized I needed to shed. And though the teachings are still to raw to read I latched to the pillar of religion and it once calmed me.

10

You incinerated us with your passion Your smile, your joy You did enough. You did well. We’d wish for double your time Triple, quadruple, more But you did enough. You did well. I am proud of you, as one of many Who know you as much as they didn’t You did enough. You did well. I love you and if there’s an after I know you are in it You did enough. You did well.

0

Dec 21, 2017

Dec 21, 2017 at 8:04 PM UTC

You Did Well

You incinerated us with your passion Your smile, your joy You did enough. You did well. We’d wish for double your time Triple, quadruple, more But you did enough. You did well. I am proud of you, as one of many Who know you as much as they didn’t You did enough. You did well. I love you and if there’s an after I know you are in it You did enough. You did well.

12

I have lost everything in this moment. Seven years. Seven short years. Word hard, do well. I will make it there soon. Rest easy, angel.

0

Dec 21, 2017

Dec 21, 2017 at 7:57 PM UTC

Untitled

I have lost everything in this moment. Seven years. Seven short years. Word hard, do well. I will make it there soon. Rest easy, angel.

6