MiserableAtBest
*Bibliophile/Pluviophile / *Introvert / *Writer? / / The devil came to take me to hell; I'm already there. / / "The sadness will last forever." / Vincent Van Gogh / / Rebecca Donovan / Becca Fitzpatrick / Jessica Shirvington / Lauren Kate / Cynthia Hand / Elizabeth Chandler / -please do not plagiarize or make my pieces yours in anyway. they are copyrighted, and they are mine. writing is one of the only things I have left, so please don't take it from me-
"You are the only thing that can stop you from sinking."
"And I wish I had my life jacket built inside of me like everyone else does. But I don't. And my life guard is off duty."
Oct 26, 2014
Oct 26, 2014 at 11:36 AM UTC
And she looked in the mirror at the wallflower staring back at her
And she was a dead end dirt road
And he did not love her
Only the freshly paved, never- ending interstate
Oct 23, 2014
Oct 23, 2014 at 6:28 PM UTC
I am rushed inside, away from the storms that call out
I look out the window, pressing my hand against the cold glass
I rise and wander out the door
Onto the black boulevard
Do you take the time to notice how the rain cleanses the cracked, crumbling street?
I close my eyes
Inhale deeply
And fall to the pavement
Let it
Drench me
Strip me bare
Oct 13, 2014
Oct 13, 2014 at 1:35 PM UTC
If I could,
I would,
But I can't,
So I won't.
If I could say it,
Say sorry,
I would,
But it's impossible.
I'd say sorry,
For my insecurities,
For my pain,
For my sorrow.
For the trouble,
For what we did,
For me,
For everything.
For telling you my fears,
For trying to hide my tears,
For every message that you and I sent,
For every lie you told,
For every lie I believed,
But I can't.
For how I was torn,
For how I could've sworn,
That you were the truth,
But I can't.
For my cries,
For the words of discontent,
I wish so much to say sorry,
But I can't.
For the dreams,
For your heart that is hollow,
For my wants,
For what I see,
In forever,
It will take a never-ending apology,
For now I wish I could, but I can't.
Oct 13, 2014
Oct 13, 2014 at 1:04 PM UTC
Sticks and stones may break my bones,
But the words you say to me will always hurt worse
They're like a a thousand knives cutting open my heart
Every time I miss you or you're angry with me or not talking to me I get this feeling in my chest
This ache that doesn't go away until it's all okay
Hushabye baby I'm not dead yet,
I know who you are not who I am,
That girl is lost so very lost,
Without you
She's long long gone.
You're her map;
She needs you to find herself.
You're the key that unlocks her heart
You're the drug that soothes her mind
When we're happy nothing else could ever matter more
Looking into your eyes
She falls for you each time
Harder.
Hushabye baby do you miss me?
I'm right here
I won't let you bleed
Look back into my eyes;
It's alright
Lay your head down
Sleep tight
"I'm trying"
"I'm not dying"
Soon we'll be together
Our hearts aren't completely broken
Just weathered
I love you more than ever..
Oct 13, 2014
Oct 13, 2014 at 1:01 PM UTC
Inch away, inch away
Oblivion is beside you
Just a swipe of metal could take your pain away
Just a flick
Just a scrape
That's all you need
To have your worries drain away
To have your self fade away
To see that light
White
Black
You're long, long gone
Your heart has turned to ashes
But your soul still cries out for him
You must look through the window
Watch him suffer, just like before
Only this time
Just a little bit more
Oct 13, 2014
Oct 13, 2014 at 12:56 PM UTC
One and two and three and four
Every time I see your face
I smile
I fall in love
Ardor
I die inside
Just a little bit more
A tear slips down my face
Five and six and seven and eight
Death is knocking at your door
You're trying to be late
Oh the problems I don't want to face
Nine and ten
Look through my lens
Eleven and twelve
I'm in hell
One clock
Ten clocks
What's ten thousand clocks more
Anything to add more time for us together
This limited time with you I will treasure
When you go it'll be forever
But I know you'll be whispering,
"I just hope you know I'm still here, wherever.
I know you'll need me;
I will be there whenever.
Sometimes you'll cry out my name..
But just remember
Hear my songs
Sometimes you don't have to be so strong."
Oct 13, 2014
Oct 13, 2014 at 12:55 PM UTC
Thirteen, maybe fourteen?
I hear my step dad say the cause of **** is a woman's clothing
Eleven, maybe twelve?
I'm on the ground
The voices all around me don't hear my cries
I wish I'd die.
Nine, maybe ten?
I wake up alone and run to the neighbors
My daddy has been drinking again
He makes excuses
None of which I believe
But I smile and nod
What he doesn't know
Is his words make me bleed
Seven, maybe eight?
I never knew why I made the call to my mother that morning
About the beer cap I found in the chair
Until now
After all, it was just one, right?
Oct 13, 2014
Oct 13, 2014 at 12:51 PM UTC
I look around constantly
I slide down in my seat
I hate looking in the mirror
I hide from me
Their words scare me
I roam the hallways with my head down
I speak only when spoken to
I'm not the one people walk over to
Kayla who?
They have no clue
I sit alone at lunch
When I eat I never crunch
I sit in a hunch
It controls me
I cannot finish
I stand and walk away quickly
My skin has gone prickly
As it does every day
My hand accidentally brushes against someone familiar in the hallway
"Geez! Your hands feel like ice! Why are you always freezing?"
I mumble the excuse of a cold lunch
I stumble away
Oct 13, 2014
Oct 13, 2014 at 12:49 PM UTC
And the tears flood down my face
And my stomach turns to knots
And I get the shivers
I shake
And I can't stop
Guess I never knew you'd move on so quickly
That's what I get I guess
Deserve all the pain that I'm given
But I hope I die tomorrow
Because "how will we ever get out of this labyrinth of suffering?"
Oct 13, 2014
Oct 13, 2014 at 12:42 PM UTC