Master-of-Awesome
Hilo. I go by Bryan (a family nickname.those weirdos) I am a 16 year old girl. I like llamas, and football,Oh and music of all genres!! / Why I fangirl: / Doctor Who / Kpop / Zero (Vampire Night) / LSU's marching band / There's more, but my goal is to NOT scare you away so...yea...*rolls away* (.-.)( ._.)... / WARNING MY WRITING IS USUALLY DEPRESSING!!! So, If you haven't run away yet I hope you will like my writing and i also hope to make new friends.
I don't dream of you as much anymore
But my heart hangs on to her fantasies
I no longer fear what I cannot see
I mean I couldn't see you without me by your side
But you left
and you're getting by
And I want to die
And I can't remember the last time I stop crying
But they began when you said goodbye
I guess it's true,"there's never a right time to say goodbye.
But you tried;
To time my mind
My emotion
And what to say
But still
You broke my heart anyway
And i know everyone says I'll get over you
And on the bright side
I don't dream of you as much anymore,
But my heart hangs on to her fantasies
Dec 22, 2014
Dec 22, 2014 at 9:13 AM UTC
Stabbed by words so deep you sink and drown in your own blood
because you've cried out all of your tears.
Truth so lost almost impossible to be found
Bleeding away your cares
Is this an expression for two?
and when you speak the truth people wonder,
"Am I speaking to the crazy or the sane side of you?"
They say you need help from a professional.
Does this mean that I need to seek help from someone who has experienced my situation
or Some one who is only qualified to deem me insane with their education
Getting payed to pass judgement on my minds creation
Limiting to a life of medication
You're giving people jobs they are not qualified for
So I fake like I take your pills
And walk out the door
No offense but I don't take poison from people who have never been insane before
Dec 22, 2014
Dec 22, 2014 at 9:10 AM UTC
I guess it's true
No one wants me because I am over used
When he loved me with the back of his hand
It taught me to take it like a man
I am damaged yes I own up to it
And this blood running down my legs isn't the sign of me becoming a woman, but instead is a sign of me being forced into being a scared and scarred little girl
No it's not my period, but a reminder of the period in time I didn't have a reason to vent and rhyme;until I met you.
Scared and
Scarred little girl
Violated savagely by this cruel not so little world
Angry with everything
So when you say I'm pmsing
You're right, I am Protecting MySelf
Dec 12, 2014
Dec 12, 2014 at 9:10 AM UTC
Beautiful
It's what everyone longs to be,
But how come it seems that no one can see
That outter is cool,
But nothing can compare to what's inside of you.
No one can compare
Nor describe
Repair,
Or deny
That of the beauty inside.
Yet, we fake and we lie.
So stuck on building our pride
We forget how we look on the inside
Well, let me remind you
Beautiful
Stop worrying so much about what clothes you look
****
Fat
Skinny
And Skimpy in
When you could naturally feel the same just being in you own skin
Dec 10, 2014
Dec 10, 2014 at 4:41 AM UTC
bruises from the concrete fists that left me here alone
without a wish
not even a list
confusing me to believe
that love is this
making me wonder why i even search for it
a pain in the heart
a cut on my wrist
bleeding away all my problems
and all the tears i've held in
for all these years
my past is crystal clear
though my future path
is blurry and unstirred
so clearly obsurd
leaving here in this silence without a word
loud screams i hear from no where
just like the help i cry for whenever i'm scared
once again leaving me alone in the middle of nowhere
wondering what it would be like to be not here
but somewhere
living life right
without a care
but i guess i am stuck being the nobody
from nowhere
Dec 7, 2014
Dec 7, 2014 at 8:46 PM UTC
I'm left alone
I have no home
yes, i'm left alone because I'm the girl who's known from nowhere.
Dec 7, 2014
Dec 7, 2014 at 8:45 PM UTC
Rays of heart in my dreams
shining brighter than the sun
speaking fantasies of love
and realizing you're the one
so wherever you are
wherever you go
I believe so far
that when I run
it is me who falls into your open arms
and I shall share your glow
and the brightness of that light is how much our feelings have grown
Dec 7, 2014
Dec 7, 2014 at 8:29 PM UTC
I shortened my name
not out of shame
but merely to be a hero and save...
you
The embarrassment of not being able to say
and you cannot say this is not true
That when you read my name it confuses you
How the Brie is like cheese
and the Ana is pronounced foreignly
Put together
having no meaning;
To you.
But to me it's originality makes me
me
A shortened name carries a long line of pain
A name that no one can understand because it's always being changed
Dec 7, 2014
Dec 7, 2014 at 8:01 PM UTC
I'm a big girl with a big name
I love whole-heartedly
I think with my brain
And when people ask
Am I'm suppose to feel shame?
When they don't ask the background
when they over hear my name
Misspelled or misheard
To them it all sounds the same
there's no history
Just black culture, no change
I don't roll my eyes just for attitude
I do so because your opinion is annoying and possibly insane
Not to mention rude
I don't roll my neck to be ghetto
It is an expression of my frustration at the ignorance that you are demonstrating.
And I don't speak slang because it's the only words I know
But it's a reminder of how my ancestors were forced to live with as little education as that yet still have so much more to show
And when I dance it's not to show off my body nor break my back
But to tell a story with my hips so that you'll never forget that
I AM DIFFERENT AND I AM PROUD
And my skin color shouldn't have anything to do with that now
It's 2014
Not the 1800s anymore
Never again your down low *****
But people keep assuming before I even open my mouth
That i have no future
No good upbringing
Since when were "ghetto" names defining
Well, since when were they not
But I will walk with pride across that stage
Only time you'll see my face on the news is for something great
Because
I'm a big girl with a big name
I love whole-heartedly
I think with my big brain
I feel no shame
I just smile because I know one day
People will know my name
It's not the 1800s anymore
It's the year 2014
Dec 7, 2014
Dec 7, 2014 at 12:52 PM UTC
Let us dream
Let us cry
Let us fall
Let us die
We can't sore
No, we will never fly
But let us dream
Let us cry
When we fall
Let us die
Don't question it
Don't ask why
Just accept it as the fairness of life
Dec 7, 2014
Dec 7, 2014 at 12:48 PM UTC