Is this the price I have to pay?
In order for the depression to go away?
My heart skips beats.
My skin glistens with sweat.
My legs go numb.
My hands start shaking.
My neck crawls with heat.
My head spins and spins.
Is this the price I have to pay?
This doesn't seem fair when I see the people around me.
My parents continue to ask me why I feel the way I feel.
I dont think they understand how much I want to be free,
Free from all of these feelings that feel so real.
Is this the price I have to pay?
In order for the depression to go away?
My breath is stolen.
My thoughts are taken away.
My brain is fogging.
My body is in constant pain.
My stomach screams for help.
My fingers are weak.
Is this the price I have to pay?
I dont want this, why do they always think I want these problems.
My silent screams are all I can hear curdling in my ears.
My mouth speaks but my insides holler.
My words and thoughts just get pushed down by my worst fears.
Is this what I have to pay?
All I want is for all the things to go away.
Apr 7, 2022
Apr 7, 2022 at 2:03 AM UTC
Is it stress?
Is that what keeps me tired?
Is that whats making me a mess?
Is that why everything backfired?
Is it stress?
Is that what makes me forget?
Is that what bounds me to my bed?
Is that why I always fret?
Is that what fills me with dread?
Makes me feel dead?
Is it stress?
Its just a me thing I guess.
Sep 24, 2021
Sep 24, 2021 at 9:01 AM UTC
its been so **** long
and im sorry
i dont think i did anything wrong
idk.. like... are we?
still... yk.
you didnt reply
so ig im just gunna go
but...why?
Aug 7, 2021
Aug 7, 2021 at 6:39 PM UTC
Whens therapy starting?
Why?
Cause you make me hate me..
The truth?
Sometimes you make me want **** myself...
Apr 27, 2021
Apr 27, 2021 at 2:08 PM UTC
Whats wrong with me?
Why do I feel like this...
Dropping to my knees....
and tears dropping down into an abyss...
Why can´t I just be normal?
and ¨buckle down¨ like other people.
I dont want to feel awful..
and I am just a *******
I can´t get anything done
and I dont understand why.
This weight on me feels like a ton
and theres nobody nearby.
I hate myself because...
I dont understand myself...
why I do what i do..
why i feel the way i feel..
why i think my thoughts...
... the sharp edges control itself...
Mar 30, 2021
Mar 30, 2021 at 8:47 AM UTC
I long for the day...
That I can lay my head on your chest..
and you can play with my hair.
This will be when life is best..
when you and I can breathe the same air.
I long for the day...
That I can kiss you...
and hear your heart beating with mine
This will be when I can give you a hug anytime I need too..
when we can be together, finally, ill be fine.
Mar 19, 2021
Mar 19, 2021 at 11:38 PM UTC
Your may have hurt her,
But you did not break her.
You did not destroy her.
She will always be stronger than you,
simply because its just true.
You are nothing to her and to me.
and thats just what you will always be.
Feb 20, 2021
Feb 20, 2021 at 6:17 PM UTC
My mascara running down my cheek,
I am always so tired and I feel weak.
The lump in my throat makes it too hard to eat.
I´m so numb, will my life be complete?
My poor tear stained pillow
it probably wants a break from my low.
My heart wrenching to not be a burden
to those who ¨love¨ me, I cant be certain.
I cant walk but only crawl.
I can barley be who you want me to be at all.
You basically call me a freak while
my mascara runs down my cheek.
Feb 12, 2021
Feb 12, 2021 at 11:37 PM UTC
In my room,
Mindlessly scrolling,
to my doom.
Endlessly rolling
down the hill
of depression.
Constantly feeling ill
and not worth of self expression.
Jan 7, 2021
Jan 7, 2021 at 11:09 PM UTC
You´re so beautiful
even though you don´t believe it to be true.
I love every part of you
and I want to be with you forever through and through.
Don´t change a thing
because guess what I love about you? everything...
Dec 26, 2020
Dec 26, 2020 at 6:23 PM UTC