I'm not sure if he knows
that often, my eyes are without mascara
and lack the soft sweep of a muted brown
Does he realise
my limbs are not long and slender
and definitely not as lean as they once were
Is he aware
that my stomach is no longer flat
or even slightly firm but rounded and fleshy
Does he know all this
because each day
he looks at me as if I am beautiful
Feb 13, 2017
Feb 13, 2017 at 5:59 PM UTC
~
I felt such a wrenching pain
leaving you behind
How can someone die slowly inside
but go on living anyway?
The ache and torturous
tearing of my heart
deepened at the thought of you alone
Tiny traces of tears
still trapped between my lashes
mirror your face, your eyes
and reflected my bleeding heart
~
Feb 10, 2017
Feb 10, 2017 at 3:08 AM UTC
The tears fall and mottle the parchment
there is no ink to run
to smear
or distort
The stain of shapes, letters, words
are no longer present
to be deformed
or washed away
The instrument with which to write
no longer has use,
is no longer held
with such care,
such grace
The desk that supports the weight
of my futility
has now crumbled
in despair
The chair that held me
refuses to bear the weight
of my hollowness any longer
I've left behind
the room that is so empty
except for a distant echo
of thoughts
cultivated,
cherished
Only the view from the window remains the same
yet I do not stare in wonder
or for inspiration
I turn and walk away from it all.
Feb 9, 2017
Feb 9, 2017 at 5:44 PM UTC
*The Sun
gently warms my skin
caressing my shoulder
A warmth you once left
Will you ever be by my side again?
I wonder
at the stars
while the stillness surrounds me
Twinkling lights blinking
in tune to my hearts rhythm
Do ours still beat in tune
as they once did?
Alone,
in the shadow of the moon
I imagine the light upon your face
wherever you are
You are wondering too.
But is it about me?*
Jul 15, 2016
Jul 15, 2016 at 11:47 AM UTC
◇
*Seeing you on the other side of yesterday
you softly gazed at me
a memory I had forgotten
a sight I'd never thought I'd see
Hearing you on a silence from the future
you sounded like a different kind of man
I won't know what it is that you said
until that future is part of the plan
Tasting a sadness that reminds me
of a time that is still to come
I wash away the sweetness
that lingers upon my tongue
Inhaling an aroma of what was
I let it settle, closing my eyes
A scent of Springtime and longing
once upon a sunrise
Feeling you softly upon my soul
sending my heart straight back to you
my body is now yearning
my mind, so easily fooled*
◇
Jul 12, 2016
Jul 12, 2016 at 12:35 PM UTC
A little twinkle of light
so deep now in her eyes
In her own little world
just staring toward the sky
Not knowing you are there
or worrying because you left
Slipping in and out of slumber
a tiny whisp, on a padded bed
Holding out her hand
towards a spirit from the past
Although I cannot see it
she confirms it within her laugh
Someone is there to watch her
offering comfort and love
People she has known
that left this world so long ago
They lift her towards heaven
for some respite from this place
Not taking her for too long
always keeping her safe
When He decides it is time
she'll go to the place she's already seen
leaving behind the tiny whisp of her
and I'll know she's been set free
Dec 13, 2015
Dec 13, 2015 at 1:56 PM UTC
~
Walking into the night
she hoped to find her way
with the moon as her guide
her past, mere footsteps away
She held her head high
the unknown future in sight
moving towards the new day
while disappearing into the night
So small, in this big world,
a girl, with room to grow
turning footsteps into strides
within her eyes, a new glow
pieces of her she'll leave behind
never again to look back
Looking to a future she was meant for
she vanishes into the night so black
~
Mar 30, 2015
Mar 30, 2015 at 1:15 PM UTC
◇
Please don't wrap your words around her
direct them straight to her heart
point them in her direction
bounce them off each shining star
She'll beg you not to mention
words of longing or of lust
enticing her to look your way
words wrapped in cotton wool and trust
Never write words for a woman
as she'll take them to her soul
breathing them in like air
not noticing she's about to fall
Her heart is so very fragile
feelings, just ready to explode
fraying quickly around the edges
when she reads your first 'Hello'
◇
Mar 29, 2015
Mar 29, 2015 at 2:03 PM UTC
I've read, that through each
difficulty in our lives
we should learn a lesson
I'm not sure that I always have
but this
dear family
you have made easy
Your coldness, harsh words and ignorance
enabled me to understand finally
how life really works
and I know
that you do not understand my behavior
How could you having never asked!
So if my actions are misconstrued
(which they often are)
What a wonderful tale to tell
to all that will listen
However, when I get it right
a certain 'hush' falls around each
and every one of us.
I now no longer hear my name!
I know it's not like in the films,
where in the end you'll find out the truth
Life, just isn't like that
That is hard to realise, but I have
I hope to also learn
not to feel anger and frustration
towards you,
accepting that to a point
it's human nature
It is all so much clearer to me now
so I can allow myself a freedom
within me
that I was unable to access before
I have a beautiful space around me
giving me room
to spread my wings further
smile much wider
inhale more deeply
and see a beautiful horizon
I have truly learned
to appreciate those around me
who know who I am
I am trusted,
loved,
accepted,
flaws and all
Thank you for teaching me this
if nothing else
Mar 29, 2015
Mar 29, 2015 at 6:36 AM UTC
◇
Bleed your ink onto the page
bleed your pain on even lines
come back to me often
return, time after time
I am with you through each step
I am with you through the tears
follow me 'til the end
together for a thousand years
I watch you face your doubts
I watch you pen your troubled life
take me on your journey
where we'll reach for the beautiful sky
◇
Mar 24, 2015
Mar 24, 2015 at 2:45 AM UTC