Juliealise - Hello Poetry

numb not even here staring at my ceiling for hours waiting to hear words no texts headphones in music blasting stomach empty not eating my intense heart boom finally lets streams roll down cheeks lays on floor needs holding alone inner screaming muffled screams in fabric silence shivering repeat

0

Nov 17, 2020

Nov 17, 2020 at 9:17 PM UTC

whats this feeling

numb not even here staring at my ceiling for hours waiting to hear words no texts headphones in music blasting stomach empty not eating my intense heart boom finally lets streams roll down cheeks lays on floor needs holding alone inner screaming muffled screams in fabric silence shivering repeat

20

dear anxiety , you make me feel like my shoes are full of cement and it seems like your goal is to stop me from walking. i hate how you make me forget the next words im going to say , you got everybody thinking iam a fool , forgetful , and now looking stupid. you make me want to cry its like you only trick my eyes to flood when im happy . you make me question lifetimes and existences . you make my eyes tired and often you make me drift off into the forms of lights around me so i can daydream. you make it hard to breathe and im wondering why ... why if my lungs are so healthy then why do they constantly feel like they are collapsing on me? you try so hard to be my best friend each and every day . you constantly make it hard for me to ask simple questions when i appear out in society and now you got me thinking about what others are going to say and think about me. They might think " She's so emptied minded" "A blonde ***** with no brains" You make me feel like i'am nobody. Like fragments of me don't matter because they are all very much flawed anyways. I like to think being already me is perfect enough and i know i'll grow on things that need improvement but you have me questioning every dam thing about me and everything that i do so it starts to feel that nothing i do will be good enough. you gave me jello legs and twitchy fingers with palms that sweat way too much. i want to be at ease and flow freely so i can sway with confidence when i walk. i need to know that everything will be okay and you scream in my face NO IT WILL NOT you slap me across my cheeks saying why do you even try! look what you just did! why did you just say that! you freeze me up while i watch everyone else look at me being a freak. i wonder what people see when looking at me break out like that , my own fidgets that they cant understand , i let anxiety do its thing and my fingers play away. it goes away but knows im always dreading for the next time it comes back , yes im waiting. till next time anxiety

0

Sep 11, 2020

Sep 11, 2020 at 5:51 AM UTC

my pov: anxiety

dear anxiety , you make me feel like my shoes are full of cement and it seems like your goal is to stop me from walking. i hate how you make me forget the next words im going to say , you got everybody thinking iam a fool , forgetful , and now looking stupid. you make me want to cry its like you only trick my eyes to flood when im happy . you make me question lifetimes and existences . you make my eyes tired and often you make me drift off into the forms of lights around me so i can daydream. you make it hard to breathe and im wondering why ... why if my lungs are so healthy then why do they constantly feel like they are collapsing on me? you try so hard to be my best friend each and every day . you constantly make it hard for me to ask simple questions when i appear out in society and now you got me thinking about what others are going to say and think about me. They might think " She's so emptied minded" "A blonde ***** with no brains" You make me feel like i'am nobody. Like fragments of me don't matter because they are all very much flawed anyways. I like to think being already me is perfect enough and i know i'll grow on things that need improvement but you have me questioning every dam thing about me and everything that i do so it starts to feel that nothing i do will be good enough. you gave me jello legs and twitchy fingers with palms that sweat way too much. i want to be at ease and flow freely so i can sway with confidence when i walk. i need to know that everything will be okay and you scream in my face NO IT WILL NOT you slap me across my cheeks saying why do you even try! look what you just did! why did you just say that! you freeze me up while i watch everyone else look at me being a freak. i wonder what people see when looking at me break out like that , my own fidgets that they cant understand , i let anxiety do its thing and my fingers play away. it goes away but knows im always dreading for the next time it comes back , yes im waiting. till next time anxiety

2

My mind is constantly overwhelming and overfilling I'm constantly over feeling .. my feelings exaggerating . i just want to relax because i'm constantly tired and i don't know why. I apologize. I over analyze every decision and scenario that just happened including the one from five minutes ago and im telling myself i'm bound to be doomed no matter what i do . My mood has just ruined our day.. because i can't be okay with things being okay . I think in a way alot of things do go perfect for me and yeah alot of things make me happy but in the end i try to not care because things have always been temporary . Im use to leaving and going . coming and seeing , i get something , they take it , i lost it. I'm "loved" but i remain hurt because iam still sad sometimes and i want to just feel happiness inside and out. Iam not perfect but the idea of being unperfectly perfect is what i want to be but i don't think my flaws should be seen , and if they crawl out i'll be very ashamed just because i will care what others think of me

0

Sep 1, 2020

Sep 1, 2020 at 7:21 PM UTC

mindset that im having

My mind is constantly overwhelming and overfilling I'm constantly over feeling .. my feelings exaggerating . i just want to relax because i'm constantly tired and i don't know why. I apologize. I over analyze every decision and scenario that just happened including the one from five minutes ago and im telling myself i'm bound to be doomed no matter what i do . My mood has just ruined our day.. because i can't be okay with things being okay . I think in a way alot of things do go perfect for me and yeah alot of things make me happy but in the end i try to not care because things have always been temporary . Im use to leaving and going . coming and seeing , i get something , they take it , i lost it. I'm "loved" but i remain hurt because iam still sad sometimes and i want to just feel happiness inside and out. Iam not perfect but the idea of being unperfectly perfect is what i want to be but i don't think my flaws should be seen , and if they crawl out i'll be very ashamed just because i will care what others think of me

3

You fall in love and you fall deep , you dont fall for *** , you fall for a person. You're not in love with her, you're in love with flesh and bones and skin in which we ALL have! but not all of us have beautiful souls. Don't say you're in love with me because you'd leave in a heart beat if your desire of skin touching layed somewhere else. Use the word love carefully for the sake of others and for the sake of yourself.

0

Nov 17, 2019

Nov 17, 2019 at 12:09 AM UTC

Lust is not love

You fall in love and you fall deep , you dont fall for *** , you fall for a person. You're not in love with her, you're in love with flesh and bones and skin in which we ALL have! but not all of us have beautiful souls. Don't say you're in love with me because you'd leave in a heart beat if your desire of skin touching layed somewhere else. Use the word love carefully for the sake of others and for the sake of yourself.

1

When i write "poems" keep in mind i'm not a professional nor do i want to be , i don't know writing styles and techniques and stanzas . guys i literally just write and no this isn't a poem right now. I write to get out what i feel , things that are inside me , Im a human writing **** in my mind onto a paper or some online website and its gonna sit in those places forever . So you can sit here and tell me your interpretations on what you think my writings mean , you can talk about my writing style and the stanzas i used and i wont get what you are saying. Sometimes i dont know why i write or why im doing it , as of now i dont even know what im thinking. writing keeps my mind at peace so i dont have too many thoughts pulling my mind in circles and poking at me . Writing makes me release sins , makes me release the past onto paper and send it away no i wont forget it because its a peice of me but i will no longer let your words torture you in my body . maybe people who never knew how to express themselves and felt alone can read what i write and feel a sense of finally belonging , or not being alone , maybe they can feel at peace because they find the words they have been looking for. writing is special because we each carry our own story and words will never be enough to live up to our lifes but thank you for letting me read yours , i cherish everything i read. so you can read this , and , probably , see , unnessarcy , commas , but , thats ok. find the mistakes , us humans our use to finding those in people aren't we? Im no professional , you gonna critque me? My main object is to be as unperfect as i can be in fact i desire to mess up . I just write man.

0

Nov 17, 2019

Nov 17, 2019 at 12:03 AM UTC

Critique me would you

When i write "poems" keep in mind i'm not a professional nor do i want to be , i don't know writing styles and techniques and stanzas . guys i literally just write and no this isn't a poem right now. I write to get out what i feel , things that are inside me , Im a human writing **** in my mind onto a paper or some online website and its gonna sit in those places forever . So you can sit here and tell me your interpretations on what you think my writings mean , you can talk about my writing style and the stanzas i used and i wont get what you are saying. Sometimes i dont know why i write or why im doing it , as of now i dont even know what im thinking. writing keeps my mind at peace so i dont have too many thoughts pulling my mind in circles and poking at me . Writing makes me release sins , makes me release the past onto paper and send it away no i wont forget it because its a peice of me but i will no longer let your words torture you in my body . maybe people who never knew how to express themselves and felt alone can read what i write and feel a sense of finally belonging , or not being alone , maybe they can feel at peace because they find the words they have been looking for. writing is special because we each carry our own story and words will never be enough to live up to our lifes but thank you for letting me read yours , i cherish everything i read. so you can read this , and , probably , see , unnessarcy , commas , but , thats ok. find the mistakes , us humans our use to finding those in people aren't we? Im no professional , you gonna critque me? My main object is to be as unperfect as i can be in fact i desire to mess up . I just write man.

1

love? because i will love you.. like how flowers bloom , hearts open for the first time and last . dry me out , for be my last. love? because i will love you like waves , crashing .. hard , fast , pull you in with me and dance . loving like first light of the day , opening my eyes for the first time to the end of the day , light be gone for tonight we will soar. love? your all the way over there but somehow you stand .. here next to me im confused if its a kiss goodbye or a welcome and plz enjoy your stay

0

Nov 6, 2019

Nov 6, 2019 at 6:57 PM UTC

love??

love? because i will love you.. like how flowers bloom , hearts open for the first time and last . dry me out , for be my last. love? because i will love you like waves , crashing .. hard , fast , pull you in with me and dance . loving like first light of the day , opening my eyes for the first time to the end of the day , light be gone for tonight we will soar. love? your all the way over there but somehow you stand .. here next to me im confused if its a kiss goodbye or a welcome and plz enjoy your stay

10

soft drips of the moon melting from the sky we have lost it all the sun dried up kisses of little girls and sent boys dreaming we have all gone mad and she dances through meadows and leaps through bodies of water the ocean a blanket of soft wool ..comfort me..but not in this way ,, please drown her away and take him in the sky where it falls apart kiss me goodnight today before we see the sun rise and u take it all from me stars .. flying , soaring , colliding , creating , and sculpting , they lifted me off "away from it , away from you" they beg to me dont harm our little girl today for she must see no longer echoes of ghosts and evil cast it all away

0

Nov 6, 2019

Nov 6, 2019 at 6:54 PM UTC

unwanted touches

soft drips of the moon melting from the sky we have lost it all the sun dried up kisses of little girls and sent boys dreaming we have all gone mad and she dances through meadows and leaps through bodies of water the ocean a blanket of soft wool ..comfort me..but not in this way ,, please drown her away and take him in the sky where it falls apart kiss me goodnight today before we see the sun rise and u take it all from me stars .. flying , soaring , colliding , creating , and sculpting , they lifted me off "away from it , away from you" they beg to me dont harm our little girl today for she must see no longer echoes of ghosts and evil cast it all away

12

i want to know so many things .. truth echoes t h r o u g h my dreams i might become abstract images so different , exquisite precious comfort , nighttime protector angels arrive in dreams , how is heaven? unreal plummeting into a nether world a unknown life humbling moments.. s l i p p i n g from me anti-depressants to give away i reflect love , tired of loose ends i fall unexpectedly , now what? im still the same occasional rules filled with "bad" , is it gone?? iam now free

0

Nov 6, 2019

Nov 6, 2019 at 6:49 PM UTC

dreams

i want to know so many things .. truth echoes t h r o u g h my dreams i might become abstract images so different , exquisite precious comfort , nighttime protector angels arrive in dreams , how is heaven? unreal plummeting into a nether world a unknown life humbling moments.. s l i p p i n g from me anti-depressants to give away i reflect love , tired of loose ends i fall unexpectedly , now what? im still the same occasional rules filled with "bad" , is it gone?? iam now free

28

You are the only one on earth i ever wanted down deep. Am i afraid that "it" will ever happen again ? Yes please never leave me alone again i kept heartaches , open heart surgery . i always loved you , beyond understanding you bring things that money can't buy the big bang of falling in love , planted just for me. stay awhile perfect stranger in disguise all is known. i will never forget accidental friends of thirst . who are all me i have become several lifetimes , uncharted truths , a new universe , bodies, darkening skies , hearts and souls , grief , loss and abandonment , hidden stories. i felt loved realizing love is unknowingly wholeheartedly and unconditionally strange i discovered to dig deeper i am now thrown away i am sorry... i was my own world my precious heart permanent heart? new imagined souls? infinite waste world? i lived .. maybe..

0

Nov 6, 2019

Nov 6, 2019 at 6:42 PM UTC

my friendly strangers

You are the only one on earth i ever wanted down deep. Am i afraid that "it" will ever happen again ? Yes please never leave me alone again i kept heartaches , open heart surgery . i always loved you , beyond understanding you bring things that money can't buy the big bang of falling in love , planted just for me. stay awhile perfect stranger in disguise all is known. i will never forget accidental friends of thirst . who are all me i have become several lifetimes , uncharted truths , a new universe , bodies, darkening skies , hearts and souls , grief , loss and abandonment , hidden stories. i felt loved realizing love is unknowingly wholeheartedly and unconditionally strange i discovered to dig deeper i am now thrown away i am sorry... i was my own world my precious heart permanent heart? new imagined souls? infinite waste world? i lived .. maybe..

21

Help me to my heart for more is to be said than done If it were an easy leap , dive into the bottom of the deep Make us strangers happily meet For i will ease my love with you She was in love and wished that she were not They soon saw unhappiness around the world growing , life is short and if we live , the day is ours. Another day might be difficult , beyond peace and war , let us not leave till all our own be won She did not let her love claim loose behavior to his looks of troubled heaven Letters for you , i’am full of eyes Her own art shall break Her lips talked wisley Life has many places of such imagination making you even better My word be hope , soft eyes … pale-fac’d moon Your spirit lay to attract more eyes She was heaven lock’d up close to the ground Fly Spirit …. To the moon Clocks stopped.

0

Nov 5, 2019

Nov 5, 2019 at 9:05 PM UTC

discovering /conflicted love

Help me to my heart for more is to be said than done If it were an easy leap , dive into the bottom of the deep Make us strangers happily meet For i will ease my love with you She was in love and wished that she were not They soon saw unhappiness around the world growing , life is short and if we live , the day is ours. Another day might be difficult , beyond peace and war , let us not leave till all our own be won She did not let her love claim loose behavior to his looks of troubled heaven Letters for you , i’am full of eyes Her own art shall break Her lips talked wisley Life has many places of such imagination making you even better My word be hope , soft eyes … pale-fac’d moon Your spirit lay to attract more eyes She was heaven lock’d up close to the ground Fly Spirit …. To the moon Clocks stopped.

19