Let down so many times
I've finally turnt into soil
Out of my ashes rises another
Fruit with no toil
No sacrifice, no bad advice
To lead it astray
While it of my merits,
I see no advance or gain
I've had to learn to not be betrayed
Instead,
I gaze upon its splendor
Smile, and remember:
That I am, as a matter of fact,
Soil.
Jun 29, 2023
Jun 29, 2023 at 12:23 PM UTC
I used to pray for water,
Now I thirst for the wine
My father foraged in the mud—
The grapes don't fall from the vine
I want it all.
Everything's that's owed to me.
What goes around,
Comes around
At least that's how it's supposed to be.
Jun 12, 2022
Jun 12, 2022 at 10:52 PM UTC
I still listen to the playlist you sent me
I hate that I love it
I hate I've still got it
I hate I'm not wanted
by You.
Boys don't cry
So I die to these songs—
Numbers don't lie
So I'll write to my wrongs
And every time I start to feel
the "Woe is me's" strong,
I'll reflect instead
Upon all the times
I was the one devoid of respect
I know better
but I'm no better,
I don't deserve to be bitter
I deserve to be sorry.
Sep 15, 2020
Sep 15, 2020 at 10:36 PM UTC
I spend my downtime digging holes
that five fifths couldn't fill
Snakes and serpents in my grass don't hisssss
But they ****
Still digging, digging
To find how deep the self-hatred goes
When I finally reach the bottom of the pit,
I'll let you know
But you'll never really know.
Not unless you're down here with me—
And you're not.
It's me verse the world.
I rehearse my curses
And inverse my pearls
I clam up, clamp shut
And let darkness unfurl
so dark, So Dark
But I can still see the stars
I also see that they're all yours
And not ours
I don't see the light nor do I feel the guilt
I hark the barters of midnight
And watch the eyes in the hills;
Geminis cry for more heighth
While my wrists mine for stilts
We pray and prey in the forest
for more, and more, and more mills
But the trees don't fall.
Jul 17, 2020
Jul 17, 2020 at 12:41 AM UTC
I used to be Sisyphus—
but now I'm the rock.
I go where the tide goes,
and I'll stop when it stops
I promise.
I remember when prayers were short
and the wish lists were long
When the world told me I was null
And it used to be wrong
May 21, 2020
May 21, 2020 at 11:26 PM UTC
Who knew this would be 22?
2 haunted by the past 2 look forward
They told me I just needed some more,
But I disagree
I sprained my ankle in forest;
I saw the fallen trees
Running from the shadows
'Til I found out they were me
I'm never free.
I'm never me.
Apr 25, 2020
Apr 25, 2020 at 12:03 AM UTC
i'd jump every moon,
and wrap their heads with stars for You
**** on their tombs,
spread their ashes on mars for You
tend to every papercut and scar for You;
then make paper regret the day
he tried to spar with You
if You were mine
and i were Yours,
i'd need no out or space
unfortunate for me,
unrequited love becomes so commonplace
when you need more than mirrors
to put a smile on your face
i bring You flowers,
You ask me: "where's the vase?"
what a shame.
Apr 3, 2020
Apr 3, 2020 at 6:08 PM UTC
There ain't a single **** star that feels me.
Neither do the toucans and hummingbirds,
This picture's worth a hundred words.
My pitcher was a funnel first;
If it was half-empty,
I'd be somersaulting,
shook and stirred
High off life
Instead of hiding my face from the sky,
A little birdie tells me, "it won't be alright."
I change the covers of these books,
'Cause that's as far as you'll look
But I'll write in invisible ink just in case.
Then laugh
about how I've managed to paint and erase
Simultaneously
The only one who I amaze is me.
One-hundred.
Mar 28, 2020
Mar 28, 2020 at 11:10 PM UTC
I was afraid to infect others
way before the virus
I took the path less traveled
'cause the former wasn't lifeless
And I need silence.
I need an escape,
A refuge from my eyelids
The only time I need help,
you call in sick.
Mar 18, 2020
Mar 18, 2020 at 4:54 PM UTC
Lately,
I've come to grips with the consequence
Of being a deeply closeted optimist;
My outer self is the opposite:
The birds jeer me
For the wind steers me,
Knocks me down with a flick;
At least the flowers are pretty.
Mar 15, 2020
Mar 15, 2020 at 1:33 AM UTC
