You ignore me
I still try to talk to you
You never answer
I continue to call
You treat me as if I do not exist
I want to be invisible
The film starts at my fingertips, and slowly slides up to my elbows, past my shoulders, and finally covering my entire face.
The liquid begins to glide down the front of my chest, then speeding down past my waist.
By the time it reaches my knees, I have lost all memory and all feelings
I have nothing.
And when it completely covers me from head to toe, I stay frozen, stationary
Distant from being alive
No one can see me
I am invisible
Sep 1, 2018
Sep 1, 2018 at 11:18 PM UTC
Love
World peace
No hate
Friendship
Greatness
A better life
New days
No stress
Blissful mornings
Cures for diseases
Increased vocabulary
New creations
Imagination
No more sadness
Thoughts
Dancing
Laughter
Light through darkness
Maturity
Equality
Paradise without Hell
Forgiveness instead of grudges
A world where 'beautiful' is
A brighter tomorrow
Hope
Sep 1, 2018
Sep 1, 2018 at 10:55 PM UTC
You have no idea what you mean to me
Clueless, unaware, completely oblivious.
Dare I open my mouth? Dare do I tell the secret of what I hid beneath my skin for so long?
Secrets and trust can NEVER go hand in hand.
So I spill each letter of secrecy, liquid pouring out of my heart and soul, praying that you will still accept me and (maybe) even love me for who I am.
My secret is out. No more hiding.
I Love You
Sep 1, 2018
Sep 1, 2018 at 10:48 PM UTC
Make sure breathing is the first thing you do when someone you love enters the room.
Blue looks good on you, but not on your cheeks as a blush.
Inhale.
Exhale.
Aug 23, 2018
Aug 23, 2018 at 5:45 PM UTC
I feel like I have lost my words.
Once they flowed so easily
Time has ripped my mind from the flow of my mouth.
I fell in love with a someone else's soulmate.
I became selfish and jealous and pushed myself to a point that my words became useless.
When you choose emotions over words instead of bringing the two together
you create a self destructing version of yourself that lives on the outside while the true version of yourself watches on the inside.
Hiding writing is the hardest thing I chose to do with my life
I would look around at creation and say to myself, 'that's nice.'
Only my insides are screaming, 'describe it! write it down!'
Or something dark would encompass my being and instead of fighting with a pen, I cowered, crumbling.
I allowed myself to be swallowed, digested, and even parts left behind, scattered around a crime scene where my words made a difference
Instead I chose a cowards way, pretending I was incompetent
And my words slowly dwindled down as short as I could possibly make them.
One day, I saw a baby chicken have a seizure, and I started to cry. And as my tears flowed, I thought to myself how would that chicken describe me ?
It seems extremely odd I know, but in that moment I couldn't think of a single word. My lungs tightened as I continued to hold this now lifeless creature.
Lifeless
Breathless
Speechless
Aug 23, 2018
Aug 23, 2018 at 5:34 PM UTC
No one knows the darkness I feel under my skin
How twisted I felt, trapped beneath a weighted cloth
Yet your hands, rough, removed the cloth and inspired my soul to be genuine
To no longer hide beneath a veil of innocence, but to embrace the dark and love deeply within its covers
You walked in as a gentleman
You would leave as a wolf
Making me yearn for memories we had made together to happen again
giving anything to relive the movie of us, the moment I kept staring at your lips wondering what they would taste like
Now I am unable to breathe, feeling a constant choking in my throat, a squeezing in my stomach.
Your cologne rips through my body, makes my mind flash to the night we rubbed against each other, how much passion how felt after I realized I did not kiss you correctly
I am sure I did it all wrong
I am sure you do not feel the same
And since I am treading with my lips barely above the surface of the water
I know you will not extend your hand
Or even offer an assuage for my broken body
And yet you smile, you laugh, knowing how I must feel, being unable to breath around you
You intentionally speak my name with a ragged breath, which again sparks another cluster of memories
Im dying inside, collapsing within leaving nothing more than an empty seashell that rattles because of the broken pieces
Part of my mind wants amnesia, to forget about the way you make me feel
however the other part begs me to keep memories fresh, feeling your flesh against mine
Never stop
Don't let the wounds heal
I know you bite,
I again feel the pressure of your mouth against my throat, my heart racing as I beg for you to rip my innocence open
And allow the weight to flow freely from my veins
Eventually I need to move on
I have to stop looking your way, or driving the same route home that you do
I have to tell myself that you never truly wanted me, that you just used me, and now your memory is simply a poison in my veins that burns and adds more weight to my cloth
if only your venom would stop tasting so sweet
Jun 16, 2018
Jun 16, 2018 at 2:55 AM UTC
Trying to be perfect
Wake up in precision,
Yet the goal is a precipice.
Scale the wall
Be yourself
Perfection is never the absence of a crack;
Rather it is embracing the cracks as you add a little more glue.
I am shattered, being pieced together
I start to embrace myself--to be confident every day--without anxiety, overthinking, or the crude part of myself that says I will never scale the wall.
Piece by piece
One step at a time
One day I will release myself from choosing what I know rather than what lies on the other side
alarm goes off
Wake up
Breathe
Step
Jul 9, 2017
Jul 9, 2017 at 6:05 AM UTC
I thought I could walk away from writing by falling in love.
I have not touched a piece of paper in so long, I forgot how it felt between my fingers, and even what it smelled like.
Now my heart is hurting and I run to the paper. A lover that simply sat and waited on a desk, collecting dust.
I could be rejected from paper, but He opens up to me.
'I have missed you,' He says.
His perfect lines as straight as before I left.
'Ive been gone too long. May I.....?' I pull out my wooden ink pen.
The paper suddenly sticks to the desk.
'Of course. Always for you.'
I lightly touch the paper with the tip, and my mind is already flowing out the hurt and pain. All my feelings have pulsed through my bloodstream, into my fingertips and to the end point of the writing utensil.
My pen scratches, and I can already feel the two of us sighing, releasing against one another
May 29, 2016
May 29, 2016 at 12:20 AM UTC
I is such a selfish letter.
Always I
Do this
Can
Will
Know
Only it is never just "I"
When you discover that two halves of 'eyes'
Make a vision
When they come together
Nov 3, 2015
Nov 3, 2015 at 11:42 PM UTC
I don't understand why I am breathing.
You are dead, and yet I am alive.
Why?
Even better. Could we trade?
Could I see the beautiful place you are now and you, return here, with the family?
It would not have to be long, or I can schedule a swap once a day.
I know there is a balance,
I just have not found it yet.
I am looking for the place of solace
Where bugs are gone and sunlight lasts forever.
The place where the grass is softer than and feather, and apples need no skin as they grow.
May 23, 2015
May 23, 2015 at 3:53 AM UTC