GnawingHeart - Hello Poetry

I can't explain my mind It's a mess, an inscrutable maze Full of complex twists and turns I can't tell you my face You may cringe and back away Unimaginable horrors engraved in my eyes I can't tell you my childhood The hate I received And the love I was rejected I can't tell you my love The soul I would have battered and bruised If only for a goodbye I can't tell you the answers I don't know them I still struggle to survive a day But I can tell you, through experience that it gets better.

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Dec 24, 2018

Dec 24, 2018 at 11:03 AM UTC

Things I can't tell you

I can't explain my mind It's a mess, an inscrutable maze Full of complex twists and turns I can't tell you my face You may cringe and back away Unimaginable horrors engraved in my eyes I can't tell you my childhood The hate I received And the love I was rejected I can't tell you my love The soul I would have battered and bruised If only for a goodbye I can't tell you the answers I don't know them I still struggle to survive a day But I can tell you, through experience that it gets better.

18

I live in a bubble. Floating across the world. Minding my own business, In a sphere of happiness Am I suffocating in it? Possibly, but I like my bubble. Life's worries can't get me When people wish to pop it, I fly above them, out of reach. But the end is inevitable. I'm going to have to face the real world Pay taxes and get a job Be on my own; all alone But right now I'm in a bubble And I don't have to face the outside world.

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Dec 24, 2018

Dec 24, 2018 at 12:37 AM UTC

Bubble of Bliss

I live in a bubble. Floating across the world. Minding my own business, In a sphere of happiness Am I suffocating in it? Possibly, but I like my bubble. Life's worries can't get me When people wish to pop it, I fly above them, out of reach. But the end is inevitable. I'm going to have to face the real world Pay taxes and get a job Be on my own; all alone But right now I'm in a bubble And I don't have to face the outside world.

15

You say it won't work; That we need a break Was it me? I'll change So you will love me I'll replace my face, So you can finally stand it I'll shatter my soul, So you can walk over it I'll put on a collar, The leash in your hands Tell me what you want I'll become anything For you

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Dec 23, 2018

Dec 23, 2018 at 11:34 PM UTC

For you

You say it won't work; That we need a break Was it me? I'll change So you will love me I'll replace my face, So you can finally stand it I'll shatter my soul, So you can walk over it I'll put on a collar, The leash in your hands Tell me what you want I'll become anything For you

14

Black and Sleek Polished and Shiny Heavy with the weight it can bare One's anger shot through the barrel Piercing an innocent heart Dripping red, splatters to the floor Iron mixes with gunpowder Two souls clashes together Their eyes meeting The first flashes with regret The other rolls back and leaves The release of one's anger Always has it's cost

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Dec 23, 2018

Dec 23, 2018 at 11:23 PM UTC

A Metal Killing Machine

Black and Sleek Polished and Shiny Heavy with the weight it can bare One's anger shot through the barrel Piercing an innocent heart Dripping red, splatters to the floor Iron mixes with gunpowder Two souls clashes together Their eyes meeting The first flashes with regret The other rolls back and leaves The release of one's anger Always has it's cost

13

My boundaries? My skin My chubby fingers My hairless head My crooked nose My fat body My soul is wrapped in these things How do I become free How do I shed my skin How do I fly as high as the birds in the sky How do you build wings? Do I have to face my demons?

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Dec 23, 2018

Dec 23, 2018 at 11:21 PM UTC

I'm trapped

My boundaries? My skin My chubby fingers My hairless head My crooked nose My fat body My soul is wrapped in these things How do I become free How do I shed my skin How do I fly as high as the birds in the sky How do you build wings? Do I have to face my demons?

12

When faced with darkness for extended amounts of time You become used to it You find comfort in that dark corner of your mind Thoughts running free You learn to embrace every dark thought Never seeing the knife until it's in your back The steady rise of the tsunami with each new thought The big wave finally comes crashing down Stripping me of my tears My memories scratch their way out of the tight box Coming from every angle, the unwanted emotions The insults come swooping in The self hate worse with each thought My body shakes with the sobs My pillow covering muting me I feel dizzy I feel sick The wave retracts and I am left raw I pick myself up And adjust my mask I'm ready to go on.

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Dec 23, 2018

Dec 23, 2018 at 11:20 PM UTC

Mental Breakdown

When faced with darkness for extended amounts of time You become used to it You find comfort in that dark corner of your mind Thoughts running free You learn to embrace every dark thought Never seeing the knife until it's in your back The steady rise of the tsunami with each new thought The big wave finally comes crashing down Stripping me of my tears My memories scratch their way out of the tight box Coming from every angle, the unwanted emotions The insults come swooping in The self hate worse with each thought My body shakes with the sobs My pillow covering muting me I feel dizzy I feel sick The wave retracts and I am left raw I pick myself up And adjust my mask I'm ready to go on.

21

I sit here In the calm I'm numb I just don't know it I didn't know the answer So I guessed And it cost me My dreams now lie in smithereens My heart, In shambles How do I pick myself back up?

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Dec 23, 2018

Dec 23, 2018 at 8:34 PM UTC

One Action

I sit here In the calm I'm numb I just don't know it I didn't know the answer So I guessed And it cost me My dreams now lie in smithereens My heart, In shambles How do I pick myself back up?

11