It's been a while.
Years have gone by since I've put pen on paper
Allowing my soul to free itself from its fleshly constraints.
Looking back now,
I wonder why I'd imprisoned it, myself, in the first place.
I want to start anew.
A fresh and crisp page.
Newly potted ink.
A desk cleared out, given a new purpose.
But
In this act,
I fear I may do myself the injustice of inadequacy.
In this act,
I fear I may inadvertently erase my past self.
In this act,
I fear I may write up a new persona, someone who is not really me.
And oh what a shame that would be,
For everything I'd done and said as a naive adolescent
It would all be in vain.
So yes,
It's been a while since I'd sat down with myself,
Had a conversation with my thoughts and my heart and my innermost secrets I've hidden from my own mind.
And so yes,
I want to start fresh, to start anew.
But should I? Will I?
Most likely not.
Mar 18
Mar 18, 2026 at 7:06 PM UTC
The sun shone through your hair,
A brilliant, dazzling sight,
Of copper hair
Encircling the face of an angel
Forcing me to gaze in wonder.
As you opened your strawberry lips
To confess your love to me,
I awoke to feel a rush of rage and sorrow,
Since I know that I truly will never see you again
And by the next night,
You'd be faded from my memory.
Aug 7, 2019
Aug 7, 2019 at 10:52 PM UTC
Dejected morals
And lost epiphanies;
Shattered minds
And forgotten souls;
Forgoing an empty adventure
Filled with agonizing mishaps
And hollow heartbeats;
Screams in the void
Will forever echo
The tragedy in your voice
That haunts your mind.
Jul 26, 2019
Jul 26, 2019 at 11:27 PM UTC
The doors scream;
The tiles creak;
The wind shrieks, shattering the grimed windows;
The window shutters slam in agony and anger;
The electricity thrums in anticipation of violence;
The wolves howl at the screaming doors forcing a brute entrance;
The silken blood rushed into each crevice running from imprisonment;
The enraged Earth quivers and shakes in pure, undiluted rage;
The inflamed sky rips the ground and everything upon it to shreds, painting the world ruby red;
The universe tears itself apart in a flurry of unrelenting sorrow and agony;
All as the blood of a sheep seeps into the souls of the living.
Jul 8, 2019
Jul 8, 2019 at 8:53 PM UTC
Sometimes I wonder
Is something wrong with me?
Why can I not feel the same emotions that everyone else feels?
Why do I analyze to the point of self-destruction?
As they tease and laugh, lost in their own world of the moment
I see
Every mouth twitch;
Every flick of the eye;
Every jaw clench;
Every facade that surrounds them.
Or...
Is that just a figment of my cruel imagination
Forcing me to pretend to be someone I'm not
Because I cannot trust the faces around me.
When I'm alone with you
And you smile so beautifully
I do not trust you.
I will only trust you once I have seen your truths
The screams and tears that crave an escape from the silk cages
That you've entrapped them in.
When I am alone, walking down the streets,
As the sunrise washes my sins of the night away,
That is when I wonder to myself
If there is something wrong with me
or if
I am the only one who can see what the blind cannot.
Jun 27, 2019
Jun 27, 2019 at 12:46 PM UTC
You're just like the stars.
Always on everyone's mind,
Yet somehow never on mine.
Jun 22, 2019
Jun 22, 2019 at 12:45 PM UTC
Looking down on the Earth,
Behind my steel bars that limit me,
I wonder what feeling is like.
How do you feel when your veins are tangled?
How do you feel when your brain is smashing against your skull, wanting freedom?
How do you feel when everyone tries to click their heels and wish to go home,
But can't since they have nowhere to go?
Scraping my knees against the pavement.
Dropping on the streets of New York.
Unwanting to get up.
Unwilling to live.
I am stuck behind a birdcage.
I am just for show.
Even when my body washes up on the beach, as red as the blood that streams in you.
I am for show.
Bars holding me back.
My mind taken from reality.
Thrown into the clouds.
Stuck on a melting rainbow.
Ready to crash down.
Back on to the world.
Even as I watch humanity grow weak.
I will not shed a tear,
Since I am not a part of humanity.
I do not count myself as human,
If humans are defined by ones cowardness and ability to find
Dark humor in grotesque situations of another's pain.
If 'human' is defined by throwing ones self onto another
to find happiness,
I will not dare call myself human.
Jun 18, 2019
Jun 18, 2019 at 10:22 PM UTC
This here is my truth.
It's raw, scarred flesh
A disgrace to look upon,
But this maggot-infested truth
Is mine.
Yours, my sweet-tempered lover,
Lies elsewhere,
In the midst of glorious joy
That everyone longs for.
Your truth, my honey-eyed darling,
Is one to be accepted with open arms,
Unlike mine
Which must be accepted only under the harshest conditions.
This is my truth:
I am not who I say I am.
May 20, 2019
May 20, 2019 at 12:55 PM UTC
I used to love the way your words flowed in a perfect harmony
But now all I hear is a boring, bland, buzz
That haunts me everywhere I go.
I used to adore the way you smiled at everything
But now all I want to do is smack the grin off your face
That takes in all my worries as a joke.
I used to love the person who I thought you were;
A person that always listened and understood
A person that would follow me to the end of the world and beyond.
I used to crave a person that did not exist
So instead I loved you.
May 19, 2019
May 19, 2019 at 8:30 PM UTC
I find madness
A little bit comedic
Since as I look at the world upside down
You see it lopsided
As another sees it morphed.
And though we understand our differences
We still take the time to argue
For which one of us is right
And which is the fool
Even though
We all are.
Apr 27, 2019
Apr 27, 2019 at 3:28 PM UTC