Every laugh
Is another tear
Every smile
Begins another heart break
Every memory
Is a new nightmare
It’s you who haunts my dreams
Every “I love you”
Is just the ammo
For the gun pointing at my heart
And it’s you behind it, holding the trigger
With a big
BANG
You’re still saying “I love you”
You’re still without cuddles
You’re still head over heels,
For another girl
You shot me dead
So you could move on
These memories you gave me
Are now wounds on my skin
Every “I love you” that you say to her
Is you pushing the knife deeper into my skin
Wanting and needing to hurt me
She hates me
So, by default
So do you
Take back the smiles
Take back the laughter
Take back all the memories
All they do is leave me to die.
But I still think of when
You held me tight
And kissed the tear that had streamed down
Told me
You’ll always love me
Never let me go
Well now,
It’s tome for me to go.
Dec 7, 2018
Dec 7, 2018 at 12:00 AM UTC
Cut 1 Cut 2 Cut 3 Cut 4
Oh how my arms are getting sore
Drip 1 Drip 2 Drip 3 Drip 4
I can’t count the drops anymore
Pill 1 Pill 2 Pill 3 Pill 4
I can’t see the doorway anymore
Step 1 Step 2 Step 3 Step 4
I feel myself falling to the floor
Breath 1 Breath 2 Breath 3
Breath...
Oct 5, 2018
Oct 5, 2018 at 2:12 AM UTC
The smoke from the air fills my lungs as I deep inhale
...Exhale
Its the only type of high I feel
...Inhale
The constant green of "de huff"
...Exhale
I roll the **** into my mango swisher sweet
...Inhale
I lick the edges shut
...Exhale
Here I go again, up into my high
...Inhale
Don't bring me down
...Exhale
Until I'm underground
...Inhale
6 feet underground...
...exhale...
Jul 16, 2018
Jul 16, 2018 at 12:01 AM UTC
If I die before I wake....
I hope to take my place would be an earthquake
rumbles the ground until there is no sound
its not like I made the earth go round.
If I die before I wake...
there surely would be no ache
of the heart, stomach, or soul to take.
If I die before I wake...
it would never daybreak
the sun would still rise
the moon would still set
the earth wouldn't take any debt
If I die before I wake...
I hope and pray they still find happiness in cake...
Jun 20, 2018
Jun 20, 2018 at 1:06 AM UTC
Today...
2018
Today...
Day Number 70
Today...
I hurt today
Today...
I work today
Today...
Is a different day
Today...
Will end different than yesterday
Today...
I won't cry
Today...
I won't yell
Today...
I will smile
Today...
I will be happy
Today.
Mar 11, 2018
Mar 11, 2018 at 3:00 PM UTC
Tis' the season of sweaters,
as in, I'm freezing my *** off, I need SOMETHING
all anyone really has is a sweater
because it's supposed to be warm
But its not
You know when you get that feeling,
or, rather
Loss of all feelings
In your legs, arms, and nose.
Yep, this is just another average day
The only difference is that its your sweater that's around me
Your sweater that is keeping me warm
Its your sweater that I am wearing now, even while I type this.
The only difference is that you were the one wanting to be there
When I was cold
Mar 11, 2018
Mar 11, 2018 at 2:55 PM UTC
I wish a lot of things
I wish I was different
but I'm not
I wish we didn't end it
but it did
I wish we could start over
but we won't
I wish I could make you happier
but I can't
I wish you weren't **** a ******
but you are
I wish
I wish
I wish
But they will never come true.
May 12, 2016
May 12, 2016 at 1:45 AM UTC
Pain is inside us all
much like fear
consuming us
making us rip ourselves apart
Pain grabs us by the hair,
flailing us to and fro
like a new toy
that they can't put down.
Pain is a dark cloud within you
nobody else can see it
but it burns deep within you
eating at you
making you deteriorate from the inside out
You decompose until there really isn't anything left
except to survive.
Pain controls us all...
May 5, 2016
May 5, 2016 at 12:20 PM UTC
I don't have any....
Like at all....
No way would this work...
I'm leaving anyways,
There is no time for anything
At all
To happen
May 4, 2016
May 4, 2016 at 2:04 PM UTC