BeccaIsLame
19/F
I’m no longer a poet, if I even was one in the first place. / This world I stumbled upon, / like Heaven to a sinner, / I released my sins and I repent / I repented. / And now, I fly free as a bird, / with clipped wings, / and with the confidence / of a pigeon ;)
the sunlight gazes down upon your skin
highlighting the speckles in your eyes
you embrace them with a caring grin
while staring with the ocean tides
you shine like the sun on a stormy night
nonsensical yet charming
and when your eyes gaze so bright
the warning bells scream, alarming
your heat is a soothing fear
drawing me close
blinded by your debut premier
i could only throw a single rose
my light may not shine like yours
and my heat be as striking
but love, this warmth has been through wars
waiting for you, hiding
you are the beauty of my doubt
and the rose to my thorn
to you, i am devout
and by love, i am sworn
Mar 14, 2022
Mar 14, 2022 at 11:59 AM UTC
If I could go back in time, I would.
Go back to a time nor peaceful
but when I held you in my arms,
everything felt okay.
I remember your eyes, and the way they would sparkle
and the way they'd crinkle when I had made you laugh
and how could I forget the sadness in them,
when I had told you I was leaving
I don't think you believed me when I told you I loved you
but to be fair, I didn't believe you either.
We were taught that our love was a sin,
and thus we were too scared to call it such.
Sometimes I think about the hill, the one we'd meet upon,
and sometimes I'll cry as I see your silhouette in front of the sunset.
You have always reminded me of the sun. So bright, so... you.
I suppose the sun thought so too.
Feb 4, 2019
Feb 4, 2019 at 4:07 PM UTC
i remember the cold grass,
flattened beneath our backs,
as we stared upon the stars above
your eyes would glow,
the most beautiful sight to be seen,
the stars could never compete
and when i would put my thoughts into words,
you'd blush; and the smile to grace your face,
was much like the sun above
you'd often blind me,
making my eyes burn, a pleasant sting,
while you sit, oblivious
oh, how you took my breath away
Feb 2, 2019
Feb 2, 2019 at 8:04 PM UTC
I remember the better days,
back when the trees had color,
and the birds would sing
A mother would smile,
watching her daughters play,
skipping around with their puppies
The wind was soft,
the sky was bright,
and the sun brought comfort
Toys would litter the floor,
while giggles could be heard,
the mother shaking her head and smiling
Oh, what happened to those days?
The people changed,
the mother popping pills,
the eldest picking fights,
and the youngest, confused and terrified
She sought comfort in her toys,
and it simply brought them to life
A blue dragon and a tiger,
an unlikely combination,
were her heroes
She learned from them,
they were her best friends,
distracting her from the world falling apart
And fall apart, it did.
Jun 10, 2018
Jun 10, 2018 at 11:00 PM UTC
You control my life,
restricting each breath,
each laugh
Because of you,
I’ve forgotten how to smile,
how to live
You took all my friends away,
leaving just me,
and me, alone
You forced me into things,
things I hated,
but they were the only things that brought relief
And I find myself thinking about the past,
before I met you,
before you ruined my life
I don’t know how I used to be like that,
so happy,
so alive
You stole everything from me,
and now,
I don’t even know who I am
Jun 2, 2018
Jun 2, 2018 at 11:47 PM UTC
What do you do,
when your entire life
has been an act?
A terrible mask,
glued to my face,
suffocating me
The mask shows a smile,
while underneath,
I crumble
But that’s okay,
I guess,
as long as you’re happy,
everything is fine, right?
May 30, 2018
May 30, 2018 at 2:04 AM UTC
Something must’ve happened,
for I cannot grasp what I am feeling
conflicted yet again,
but isn’t that what life is?
My heart is numb,
my skull is aching,
it’s all I ever feel anymore,
I don’t want to live like this
I don’t know who I am anymore,
I’m not the same person I once was,
all I identify as is fake smiles,
and recent cuts
My heart is throbbing,
my head is asleep,
all I feel is hurt,
I don’t want to live like this
I’m a mess,
an island of lost ambition and broken dreams,
the scars are the isles,
and the tears are the waves
all i can wish for is that the island floods
Apr 29, 2018
Apr 29, 2018 at 12:11 AM UTC
sometimes I dream about how it used to be,
and whenever I do,
it’s always bittersweet
I used to think I’d achieve great things,
that I’d do well in life,
but here I am
sometimes I wish that I killed myself in seventh grade,
that would’ve saved a lot of things from happening,
it would’ve saved people pain
I used to think I was the smart kid,
the kid who had no problems,
but here I am
sometimes I break down,
almost like a robot with faulty wiring,
it’s exhausting yet refreshing all the same
I used to think I was nice,
the girl who was sweet to everyone,
but here I am
sometimes I wish I was never born,
so I didn’t have to endure this ****
I’d rather be nonexistent than to live this
I used to think dying was scary,
I’d pray to God, asking him for another day of life,
but here I am
Apr 18, 2018
Apr 18, 2018 at 11:33 AM UTC
I'm tired of wanting acceptance,
just for them to abandon me,
leave me in the darkened streets,
nothing in sight, nothing to see
Perhaps I should forget them,
and start to work on me,
leave them in the flood of doubts,
no matter how much they plea
They never cared anyway,
no one cares about me,
I'll push them out and lock the door,
swallowing the key
You were supposed to be the one,
the one who saved me,
but you ran away crying,
you always seemed to flee
And now I am alone,
no one but me,
maybe I can take my mask off,
and finally be me
Apr 12, 2018
Apr 12, 2018 at 11:24 PM UTC
There was a time where I lost myself,
where I got stranded in the darkness,
the sea swallowing me whole
Its hands gripping at me,
desperate to keep me under,
for as long as possible
It was violating,
my skin was flaking off,
and the sea was licking it up
I was getting strangled,
the angels in the darkness,
they only watched and pointed
I was paying the price,
for what, no one knows
I prayed,
I prayed,
I prayed
And after months of being strangled,
of losing myself, repeatedly,
I still have the marks,
and I can no longer fully be myself
Mar 24, 2018
Mar 24, 2018 at 6:51 PM UTC