Because you left me when I needed you most
When I was bleeding inside and you weren't close
I thought I should forgive, forget and move on
But I'm not mentally capable yet to go on.
The Blood inside of me is still boiling wanting to come out
It's furious that it has been trapped inside
But I'm not strong enough to yet set it free
Even though I'm used to being abandoned still, blood should stick with me
It's not your typical blood, red, thin and a pivot of life
It is indeed a grave that has trapped my soul blocking my sunlight!!!
May 24, 2018
May 24, 2018 at 5:29 AM UTC
The scars on the wrist don't show weakness
They show the strength of a person to not give up when life imprisoned them in the deepest cave of despair!!
May 16, 2018
May 16, 2018 at 6:08 PM UTC
You were the Gasoline and I was the Fire
You tried to shut me down but I only burned brighter.
May 13, 2018
May 13, 2018 at 6:47 PM UTC
You left me broke but my heart was only in two pieces
One you took with you and the other I hid it!!
Not so you wouldn't take it but so others would not be able to break it
You were in it, I was not brave enough to suddenly burn it....
Not my heart, but the memory of you
The love you left behind and the pain that now I have to go through.
Apr 15, 2018
Apr 15, 2018 at 5:31 PM UTC
When our eyes collide, burning down our hearts...
... and the hurt drowns our bodies in a pile of darkness!!!
That's when you'll realize to love again and again and again,
because a little more hurt won't make the sun shine brighter or the darkness a little lighter.
Mar 26, 2018
Mar 26, 2018 at 3:51 AM UTC
That's when you cry in hopes of letting go
To burn the pain away and recover the soul!!!
.....
Mar 23, 2018
Mar 23, 2018 at 6:24 AM UTC
Right outside the window, I see a light
Frightened that I spent another sleepless night
I'm trying to force myself to let go of these thoughts
But no they say, you have no say in this part!!
So here I am still, not crying but yet alone
Slowly drifting to sleep or so I think
My mind is still wandering and my thoughts are hyped
But I'm still trying and trying cause I'm not used to giving up..
I know it's just sleep and darkness and thoughts and nothing more
But at this exact moment, I'm not so sure
This moon outside feels so surreal, as I fall along the lines of unconscious and for a moment forget what's real.
They say its an escape, it's an imaginary reality we create
It's a platform filled with hopes, dreams, and desire to stay awake
I say it's none of that, please just hold still
Sooner it's all going to end and we'll let go of what's unreal.
Mar 20, 2018
Mar 20, 2018 at 6:55 PM UTC
Self-harm is not only physical
It's the pain you hold inside that's stabbing you deeper and deeper.
All this hurt will one day be gone
When you decide to let go of all this self-harm
When the sky becomes dark and the moon is invisible
When your eyes become red and the tears are unstoppable
When sitting feels like drowning and laying down takes too much energy!!
That's when you'll most feel vulnerable..
Not to breath, but to inhale your last air!
To let go of this world that gave you so much self-hate
That's when you think the soul needs a release,
because existence has lost its bliss.
Mar 19, 2018
Mar 19, 2018 at 4:36 AM UTC
I've been told how to look
What to feel!
What to say!
So you are expecting me to be a certain way
Surrounded by all these faces I say that I don't fit in
I see less of myself compared to that girl over there laughing ....
But maybe that's superficial
Maybe she's just like me
Hiding under a shell, and not letting others see
Maybe she wakes up with the biggest regret
Maybe she doesn't want to laugh but that's not right compared to what society says
But I'm here for you girl, and I know you cannot hear
But feel it within that it doesn't end here
I know you feel crushed, hopeless and like nothing else matters
But still feel it inside that it's going to get better
I know you've heard this a million times, better days will come
But believe me when I say the worst has not yet arrived
I know you think its hard and what's the point in living when you see your self-esteem getting crushed upon even in every single one of your dreams
It will get better, say that out loud
Not because others will make it so, but because you have the guts to throw down what others expect, disagree with what others think, crush down that conformity that society has put you in
You will make it far, try to understand
And once you believe it, the mask you have put on will finally disappear it.
Mar 10, 2018
Mar 10, 2018 at 5:30 PM UTC