And for me, part of healing is being able to listen to certain music and not cry anymore.
It takes time
It takes time for the memories to not be as fresh
Because even the good ones hurt
It takes time to slowly put in those head phones and be able to breathe when a certain song shuffles on
It takes time to know that you can remain emotionally stable when you want to listen to a certain artist
It takes time to be rewire your brain, and say "this is okay" this music that once connected me to him, still does, just in a different way
And that's okay
Jan 5, 2015
Jan 5, 2015 at 11:15 AM UTC
The truth is that letting go of you has not been an easy task
Time has not been kind
To my fragile mind
Sadness reverberates inside my chest with every heartbeat when I think of you
Some days I flare with anger
Some days I crumble with the pain
Some days I'm fine
The memories are happy
But I try my best to suppress them
Because all they do is fill me with an aching, empty feeling
truth is--
I miss you,
I miss us
But
The truth is
That you don't
The truth is
That I should be over you
Truth is
I'm not
Nov 8, 2014
Nov 8, 2014 at 10:20 AM UTC
I'm a better person today than I was the day that I met you
Maybe not more pure or innocent or unbroken
But I've grown
And I don't think I would've changed in the ways that I have if I had never met you
I'm sorry though
That you had to know me at such a time
That you suffered for my sake
For all the pain that I caused
I was selfish, immature, unready and uncommitted
I do have regrets, from my time with you
But I can honestly say, that I wouldn't take a minute of it back
We made mistakes, that's for sure
But I learned an immeasurable amount
And for that, I thank you
I just hope that you can forgive me,
That I can forgive myself
So that these memories aren't bitter, that rememberane of you might taste a bit sweeter, and less like a stabbing ache in my heart.
Oct 19, 2014
Oct 19, 2014 at 10:57 PM UTC
I was never actually good enough
You always wanted me to change
You said that that was love
And maybe it is
But maybe it's not
You hung on because you feared it was your last chance
To ever find someone like me
Someone who can love you
And I know that you're wrong
You will find her
And I hope with all my heart that she loves you with an inconceivable passion
I hope that her spirit will spark in you something that you've never known
That she will be all that you could ever ask for
And so much more
Someone who won't need to change for you
Or be better for your sake
But someone who will make you better,
For your own sake.
I hope that she will be more understanding than I ever was
I hope that she will give without hesitation
I hope that she will listen to what you're really saying
I hope that she will know exactly how to help you
That she will be patient and kind
But I also hope with all my heart
That she can hold her own
So that you will never wear her down- because she will love you, and love can do may a strange thing to people's minds.
Sep 20, 2014
Sep 20, 2014 at 10:13 AM UTC
My dear,
**Love ***** you up**
I've seen it time and time again
And still, I fail to understand
Why we do this to ourselves
For days
We're in a constant craze
Nothing else is on our minds
But that one person
That one stupid boy-
Who walks all over you
Who lies and cheats and truly, doesn't meet your needs
He has you on your knees
He won't set you on your feet
But you won't leave
No respect, just a bunch of ******** you don't deserve
But still
Even though you see the dagger poised
You leave your heart in his hands
Because he has a beautiful tongue
And his apologies are gold spun
We lie to ourselves just as much as those good for nothing ******** lie to us
A lie to justify every deceitful thing that slips past his lips
Lies keep you company
On those dark and lonely nights
But a lie can never hide the truth forever
And sooner or later
We all have to admit
That we've been blindsided by love, once again.
Apr 2, 2014
Apr 2, 2014 at 9:59 AM UTC
I slipped into oblivion
And for a minute or two I held hands with death
What separated us was nothing but murky water; Hade's Lethe
My fingers reached up
Or was it down?
They intertwined with his
He bent his Cimmerian face through the separating waters
His night colored lips briefly rested against mine
But not for long enough
I loitered on his doorstep just long enough for my heartbeat to recede, my breath to become shallow~
And then I awoke
I crashed up through the pressing weight of the deep, black water
Death's sweet embrace was broken
Mar 26, 2014
Mar 26, 2014 at 5:50 AM UTC
"Just until I'm thin enough"
She will say until the day that she is nothing but a bag of brittle bones.
Mar 25, 2014
Mar 25, 2014 at 1:31 AM UTC
You just have these spells sometimes
These moods
Maybe you forgot your medicine
Maybe it's just a bad week
But you're depressed and sad and lonely
And you write more poetry
It's beautiful
And sad
When you fall into these moods
When you have those days
I have no idea what to do
Because what words could make you feel better?
None that I could speak
What utterance of mine,
could be eloquent and meaningful enough to make you feel a bit better?
Would it make a difference if I said anything?
I just want to see you happy
Because I care tremendously
And when you're feeling pretty good
it makes me happy as well
Because all I really want
Is to know that you're doing fine, enjoying life, and happy.
Mar 17, 2014
Mar 17, 2014 at 6:52 AM UTC
It actually still hurts to touch or write on my scars
I'm just trying
To turn them into something beautiful
But my skin resents the touch of anything but a cold metal blade
Mar 17, 2014
Mar 17, 2014 at 6:44 AM UTC
I've quit being bad
Because the only boy I want to be bad for
Is you
Its funny,
You brought out the best in me
But also, the dirtiest bits
Both are sides that only you have seen
Oh what I would do for you
And for no one else
If only you actually knew
Mar 11, 2014
Mar 11, 2014 at 10:41 AM UTC