What a lonely place it is when the grace of a pause is not given.
Between patients and rationality- all the filters that each data point wiggles through. To calculate how to disarm the bomb, without sacrificing myself.
What a waste, all this energy spent to go unrealized, and not truly appreciated.
A thousand apologies nor gratitude wishes can equate to the power a single breath, a pause, can make.
Dec 11, 2022
Dec 11, 2022 at 1:28 AM UTC
Look forward to seeing you there!
Aiming for a post every weekday.
Jul 18, 2022
Jul 18, 2022 at 4:01 PM UTC
"Your discomfort is better than mine"
They speak without words.
Slowly roasting from the inside out
is a hard thing to hide;
smiling with lava in your chest.
Persist, persevere, push onward;
put a pin in it.
Pin the feelings that are inconvenient.
Note and move past the ignorance and injustice, impulsivity and disrespect.
"Shut up and melt"
Jan 18, 2022
Jan 18, 2022 at 11:47 PM UTC
Curious, the time we waste
being upset over perceived wasted time.
Regardless of the accuracy.
The ever repeating self-fulfilling prophecy
rages on expecting constant perfection.
Jan 3, 2022
Jan 3, 2022 at 10:27 AM UTC
Caught up in mirrors,
not caring for what I see.
The reflection creeps
and crawls deep inside of me.
Ignition of the core, or soul,
or whatever - doesn't matter.
As long as I can manifest
A perfect reflection of everything you'd like to see.
Dec 28, 2021
Dec 28, 2021 at 8:30 PM UTC
Never take for granted
The energy it takes
To subdue the knee **** reaction of
"Go **** yourself"
Dec 19, 2021
Dec 19, 2021 at 12:49 PM UTC
It only took me two and a half years
To feel like checking the mail
Wasn't a burden
Dec 16, 2021
Dec 16, 2021 at 9:40 AM UTC
I want to craft something unique and timeless.
Unfortunately the words do not present themselves organically.
So I look to my wandering thoughts for a sense of purpose;
to discover a catalyst and explode in a burst of creativity.
With fizzles echoing from the hollowness within me;
the empty space where hobbies and passions live.
Sought time and again, to give meaning and purpose to a life as a cog in society's machine.
Perhaps I am wasting the very time I am trying to enrich seeking a dream.
When it comes to finite resources, our concept of time is fickle and dubious.
As it often will, perception steps to the top of the hierarchy of attention.
Time management is a killer sound byte, though an illusive skill, and not often thought of outside of the office.
Grasping at the moment I cannot help but find myself wondering through the fog of the future.
I fear sitting back when I am older and looking upon a life not lived.
That the time needed to discover what I want will slip through my fingers, and the void will remain indefinitely.
Dreams are hard to fathom in a shroud of controlling darkness beyond your control.
The ever looming need to survive suffocates every orifice without mercy.
The rock and hard place of playing victim and being one by consequence of existing may as well go by “my humble abode.”
Pressure mounts with each tick, and tok - still I throw words at the page.
Waiting for the catharsis to cast itself out of my chest, violently;
for the words to fall into place like sand counting seconds encased in glass.
Oct 29, 2021
Oct 29, 2021 at 2:04 AM UTC
I am somewhat of a ticking time bomb.
I can feel the internal pressure increasing daily.
Reminding me time and energy are finite,
and that bitterness lingers like a bad smell.
Having little practice managing anger
it slips away from me like sand through my fingers.
Sand gets everywhere, leaving nasty texture only I can sense.
The dominos are falling; an unstoppable force.
The fire has been lit in me to discover authenticity.
Inherently, growing aware of every violation against my core values.
The sand allowed for lines to be drawn,
and I am not crossing them; an immovable object.
Static, stuck, still, yet not stable or sustainable.
Understanding that life comes with sacrifices,
I will no longer give away so easily.
Assimilation is removed from my vocabulary.
Sep 28, 2021
Sep 28, 2021 at 7:28 PM UTC
Hello all!
I am in the process of creating my own blog/ poetry website. I will still be posting here for a while as I continue development on the site. But feel free to come check it out in it's most basic form!
Updates to come in the coming weeks.
https://spacepuppybarks.com/
Thanks all.
-Alaina
Sep 19, 2021
Sep 19, 2021 at 2:48 AM UTC