Why does everything feel
like it's crashing down?
my whole being dissipating
into tiny dust particles
searching for a place to fall
soundlessly
I'm dying
my body is still here
my mind is gone
but to where?
astray from this beat up shell
sick and tired
disassembled and abused
by me
Aug 31, 2017
Aug 31, 2017 at 3:47 PM UTC
I won't let you win
I won't let you rip
the pride out of my chest
I won't let you make me feel
like I'm any less than of a being
since the day you contaminated
my body and my thoughts
the day you made me feel like
an empty abyss
alone within the universe
searching for my meaning
a meaning I once found
but you pushed it out of reach
drifting away slowly
right at my finger tips
you made me question my sanity
and weaken the strength
I wear as armor
you won't win
I'm going to flourish like
the elegant blossom
I've always been
Aug 15, 2017
Aug 15, 2017 at 7:45 PM UTC
i feel like this carcass
i am engrossed in
doesn't want me to
occupy it anymore
ive been trying to ignore
the shouting in my head
but it keeps getting louder
why is it screaming at me?
a home ive utilized for so long
has become my worst enemy
Aug 12, 2017
Aug 12, 2017 at 10:31 AM UTC
I just wanna be something
you don’t have to run from
I saw you and all your intentions
paving the road to heaven
And I swear I'm trying
to give up these ghosts
It's just every time I smile
in a millisecond I'll frown
And I don't mean to drown
these cylinder blocks
are keeping me engulfed
it's hard to talk
with liquid in my lungs
You dared me to be myself
more than I think anyone ever has
that's why it hurts so ******* bad
when you're sad
I could go searching for your laughter
forever
don't let your light go out
Let's vanish into thin air together
Aug 12, 2017
Aug 12, 2017 at 10:06 AM UTC
The rain hit me
dragging my feet
in the wet soil
It seems the woods
embedded me
like my dreams
A small brown cabin
mass implanted it
fractured windows
as it appeared
in front of me
some sense of suspense
ran through my veins
I felt home
Rain drizzled
down my coat
Approaching the door
maybe this
is what I needed
the ease I felt
within my bones
The woods whispered
“This is your home”
I melted into the earth
saturating into the dirt
formulating into sticky mud
This is where I belonged
all along
Aug 12, 2017
Aug 12, 2017 at 10:02 AM UTC
when my palms are starting to sweat
i think about the warmth of your laugh
echoing through my head
and it starts to soothe me
i don't know how to explain it
but im scared
one day you'll think every room is dark
with me inside it
Aug 12, 2017
Aug 12, 2017 at 10:00 AM UTC
isn't it ironic that the only things that come back come to **** you?
every time i dream i see
the house i once grew up in
i wouldn't call it a home because
i didn't feel safe there
the only difference is i see it
for what it really was
my own personal hell
embodied with memories
that were meant to stay memories
surrounded with flames
the stench of death so intolerable your nose would crumble just by one inhale
bruises on my arms from the man
who claimed to be my father
an empty bottle of whiskey
that was ingested within minutes
a hole in the wall from the belligerence
for what it seemed to me to be
a battlefield
i was only twelve and
my imagination was at its peek and
everyday was a survival game
the only problem was
i wasn't begging for my life
i was begging for my end
i saw so many things i wasn't supposed to see the blood shed and the tears
seemed unbearable for me
the nights of getting on my knees praying to a god i hoped existed
how did it get so bad
this wasn't only a dream
this was once my reality
Aug 12, 2017
Aug 12, 2017 at 9:59 AM UTC