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I haven’t been dreaming anymore.
When I was younger, I heard this voice. On the cusp between sleeping and wakefulness, I heard this whispering in the darkness.
Making no words, yet I understood.
Somewhere deep in my chest, I knew.

But as I’ve aged, I don’t hear it anymore.
My efforts to remake this feeling, this eerie unsettling comfort.
Like turning memory to stone.
You’ll never forget, but it will never be the same again.
A language I’ve forgotten.
Only the impression of it remains.
The ache of it with me. Always.
this is very unedited literally just stream of consciousness. feeling lost and confused lately. it's my birthday today but i just feel like crying.
darklybeloved Jun 21
my lover i wrap in lace;
in pink ribbons and skin milky sweet,
splayed across our pillows,
she makes a pretty picture

when we ache together,
her hair veils us in sunlight; soft, diffuse
we share a breath; a prayer,
entangled like some strange, eight-limbed creature.
a little late but happy pride month!
darklybeloved May 15
somedays i feel like i am drowning at sea,
clinging on a wooden plank for dear life

but i am the ocean - dark and merciless and oh so hungry
and the flimsy plank, tossed helplessly in the currents
and the person clutching on so desperately
feeling a little unmoored at the moment, sometimes its hard to remember what everything's for
im in love with the way you write
you make me want to believe in things
i had long taught myself to forget
there's this one writer who feels like the glow of an open coffeeshop in the rain, the soft-dying rays of summer, ships in the night - the gentle, enduring constancy of hope. to you, wherever you are now, thank you.
darklybeloved Sep 2022
today, i woke up and i was happy
for the first time in a long time
a sunday morning, marmalade mellow
there were goldfish drifting - fat and amber
blushing leaves in the fall
oh, the joy of movement
of floating, breathing, existing
entangled, cocooned
in its gentle swell and fall

and i was simply happy
saw an image of jellyfish floating in the sky -- thought how beautiful, what a lovely sight just to see jellyfish floating in the sky. also yes kinda keats vibes
darklybeloved Sep 2022
my world is coloured in shades of apathy
i want to sleep
darklybeloved Sep 2022
theres too much to do
but i'm just so
publishing all my ****** drafts into the void
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