Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
May 10 · 36
nim May 10
you dye my hair
and teach me how to sew,
you give me advice
and hear me out when i cry, too.
when i treat you bad
or when i try my best
i feel at ease, but guilty,
because it is you -
i wish to give you
more than i ever could.

forgive me,
for i am a monster
that cannot fight as well
as you do, i cannot parent
as well as you do;
you are so bright,
in both stance and wits,
even when you're clumsy too.

i love all of your jokes,
and the way you laugh,
and the way you're always first
on the scoreboard of your old FPS.
i love all of your hobbies
and the way you're full of knowledge,
yes, tell me more about what the Romans do.

thank you for showing me
how to read these
dumb scripts, and how not
to get an F in an essay.
what the professors hate,
and why i might not fail.
for cheering me up,
for trying so hard;

just know,
you are seen too.

I love you, too.
hope i can express it well enough one day <3 thank you
May 8 · 48
at peace
nim May 8
i've been fighting horrible
battles with death, with my
mind constantly overflowing, spilling;

in my lifetime
i came across people who loved me,
someone loved me;

and that's enough.
Been having horrible anxiety all the time. Relief brings immediate tears.
Mar 2 · 197
nim Mar 2
||             look at me!,      ||
i playfully scream,
                                    balancing at the edge
||     of the rusty rails     ||
used only by ghosts
of trains, and of

the cliff                                          
||       turns gravity        ||
to pull me closer,        
into a                                            hug
||    i've always wanted,     ||
like a good parent
after praising his son

the call twists my
insides                 ­               
pulling me          
                             to the cliff,

and i wander,
and i wonder,
and i
||        s c r e a m      ||
and i wish
i could

||                          ||
the rails are
closing in,
i don't have
much time

to write what i say,
                        || and sa||y what i write
i wish someone
could love me

not even the
want me,
i fall
into the void,
i     di         ||e||                  ▫️
a piece of you will always stay in me
and i don't get a say in it
Feb 7 · 56
my friend was the Sun
nim Feb 7
hello, dear Sun,
with the ever bright smile,
the Sun that seems I left behind,
the Sun that appears in my mind.

the Sun was always beautiful
and it's warmth was like no other;
it made everyone's day brighter,

if only she herself could feel joy.

i read the Sun's letter
and the wishes on the book she got me,
time and time again,
hoping, for once,
the Sun would feel some
of her very own, warm rays of light.

and so, very well,
if the Sun wishes to leave,
i will gladly go blind
watching the Eclipse,

by fits and starts
dreaming of times
i felt the warm, yellow strips,
glow on my face.

dear Sun,
if only you knew
i never meant to hurt you,
if only you knew
what i felt back then.
because feeling the dark
slowly creep in,
sensing the Sun
set back in,

i set off first.

and for the rest of the night,
i talked with the Moon.

the darkness wasn't new.

i left, when i knew i'd
be stranded in the dusk.
so i chose not to walk on that line,
but to simply indulge myself
into the night.

i left,
not you,
never you.
i escaped from the clouds
that were threatening
to drench me in poisonous raindrops,
i escaped,
knowing you'd eventually
turn off your light.

and so,
the mute silence
dropped the curtain itself.
it is made out of iron,
and i cannot lift it alone.
the Sun cannot get through.

if only Sun knew,
i never wished to leave you.

but the Sun would leave first,
this is something i just knew.

like a survival instinct
screaming i'll get burnt.

and eventually,
when the Sun left, or when
i left the Sun,
different emotions
would pass me through.

what i may be myself,
is this dark side of the Moon.

today, i give up,
for the last time,
like a shadow that evaporates
in front of a strong light,
and i am letting go.

today, i'll just hope
the Sun will remember
how special she is
and wish for the Sun
to finally be filled
with unwavering joy,
even if that may be
just wishful thinking.

the Moon at least loves me,
here in the gloom,
but i can't expect this out of a Sun;
"but you did not follow me
into the dark."
thank you for showing me this site; i wouldn't be the same without it.
i hope you are happy,
and your yellows don't get painted over.
Feb 7 · 126
nim Feb 7
a puff of breath
slips into the cold air
while i sit on the ground.
i try to restart my heart.
i hope, when the sun
hits the clouds once again,
i can be kinder,
this next day.
"I've corrupted you."
Jan 11 · 33
nim Jan 11
and even in the simplest moments,
i love you.
maybe it's corny to say, but
without ups and downs,
there would be no heartbeat drawn
in our sketch of life.
when the hills get weary
and all the buildings melt down,
i will still love you,
forever, as now.

and i will still remember
that carbonara you made me
or the flowers you picked out for me,
or when you held me while i cried
in sad, as in happy moments of our time.
don't pick another flower,
just because it screams.
for i will let you demolish my petals
and sing you to sleep.
i will cut myself with my own thorns,
twisting them inside,
just so i could spend a moment
in your soft hand, never again harmed.
whether it's lilo and stitch, that i'm
crying about
or all of the things i ruined,
and my horrible times;
it's comforting to know
i've got your arms
to hold me when i
fall apart.
thank you for being here for me when i am weird, sad, happy, in love, or even addicted to league of legends. i love you.
Sep 2022 · 67
nim Sep 2022
each passing time,
the pain gets multiplied
and it lingers on,
a scent, wrapping my body up
into mischievous agony.
amuse me, pain,
amuse me, agony;
for i have yet to show my best qualities.
the best has not yet come to pass,
but one certain thing comforts me
and puts me at ease like a sweet lullaby;
if i create, i am
if i write, i exist
and my life will forever go on,
and my existence will not be in vain.
for as long as i create,
some trail will be left behind.
the scent of death will fade,
and i will live
one more time.
Aug 2022 · 34
nim Aug 2022
in the night i fall apart
sending golden streaks into the clouds;
waving, twisting, chasing the wind,
radioactive waste polluting my lungs;
the metallic liquid drips from my fingertips
as i try to write at least one more beautiful song,
as i suffer to paint a grotesque picture,
as my own hands create chaos in my insides;
as i choke on my own words
and spill water over my eyes
just to see again, just to remember
for one more time
before i finally
fall apart
Jun 2022 · 55
nim Jun 2022
in this land of supplements,
you are the only certainty,
the original, pure essence
that can satisfy my lust.
no amount of medication
can cure me like you do,
no amount of drugs
could make me as happy as you do.
you take my lust and need for happiness
and shape it into something called life,
a life i can live,
the one i can be sure i want to live.
is this what will ultimately shape me?
or will my black void prevail?
or are you the black hole,
which swallows me whole,
and leads to something else?
when you hold my hand
i no longer fear death;
i fear for you,
and try to find ways
to satisfy you.
do i satisfy you?
or will you leave?
will the swinging make you seasick?
or will you dance in the strong wind?
or will i drown, while you drift away?
if i drown, would you still save me?
if i drown,
will you still miss this body of mine
my shell on earth
that i hate so much?
will you miss my soul,
like i would miss yours?
like i miss your body right now?
i know all of the answers,
you are as certain as time,
constant and continuous,
and your love is as comforting as life,
so i hope you know how much i love you
through this messy head of mine,
where my thoughts are escaping
and i feel ill
and i drive people away
but i hope you stay.
May 2022 · 58
nim May 2022
Don't cry no more,
my beautiful sunflower;
let's spin in the rays of sun,
let me see a straw hat crown your gorgeous smile.

Hold my fingers, whisper in my ear,
snuggle with me in the sleeping bag;
let us pray to the fallen stars,
for a dream I hope will last.

And when winter comes, I'll make
a gorgeous castle, and do whatever it takes
to keep you safe and warm, my love,
so you can last an eternity in my arms.

In return, you can lead me to the
surface, help me grasp some air,
make me float in this endless ocean,
and show me how to breathe again.
May 2022 · 86
nim May 2022
Cleopatra used to look at this moon,
But I'm just happy I get to see it with you.
I love you so much.
Mar 2022 · 223
my flower
nim Mar 2022
i'm back, my old friend
once again, i picked up the pen
to make the smile on paper alive again.
colours are filling in my heart
and with you, i can see again
i never knew how blind i was.
you are the wonderful flower
that's being acknowledged by people
passing through the streets
then picked up, to gift to their mothers,
simply because of your exquisite beauty;
you are now her flower, and mine as well.
and without you, the wind carries me away,
and i struggle to find my path alone.
dreams would hurt me, the stars would shoot me,
and the lake would tell me to drown;
but then i'd wake up,
to see you by my side.

then i hug the world, and dream of better days with you.
with you, i know i can make it through.
Oct 2021 · 236
nim Oct 2021
fragile creature, lying on the floor
naked and bare, curled up
not even crying, slowly dying inside
whilst the sun rays hit it, thus
painting a beautiful, yet a sad picture
glass pieces and ashes ornament the floor
slowly glowing in the girl's hair
in a silver dress
slowly dying on the floor
Oct 2021 · 47
nim Oct 2021
i'm tired of feeling weak
in a way that makes me even weaker;
i want back the old flame
which spited the logic of being ill.
little flame, whose reflection
shines on the window
and makes me beautiful;
all over again,
i would die for you.
Aug 2021 · 61
let go
nim Aug 2021
sometimes, the hole is too big to be filled.
other times, it's like it fills itself.
as if something breaks, and i can suddenly let go.
sometimes, i still smell your perfume,
and other times, i see your shadows in our garden and in the faces passing by.
help me let this young soul go;
i don't know if you can leave,
but help him pass the bridge.
for i was way too late,
and people all around me are starting to wither.
i can see it in their eyes, and i know you see it too.
i can see it in the tragedy of their beloved ones, and i know how they hurt.
death, as well as other situations.
Jul 2021 · 311
nim Jul 2021
in my eyes there was a hope, lit and far away,
a dream, waiting, for when things would end.
but as it comes closer, and as days go by,
my vision gets blurry, and my perspective gets lost.
no more am i merry to meet my foe,
nor do those thoughts keep me company.
a wicked ending, lurking on me,
a dead end and the black void are waiting on me.
it's hard to imagine and even harder to say,
the fear i feel deep in the night,
when not even the stars are awake.
but, come the morning and i rise,
the thoughts are gone, i'm fine again.
the loverboy sun spreads his smile
across the sky, it's on the roofs, i think it hits my soul too.
no more am i odd, no more do i cry,
but when the sky falls down, i collapse again.
i wish i could stay as brave as when i'm with the sun,
yet the nightmare never seems to end,
because it only has
one possible end.
Jul 2021 · 343
first glimpse
nim Jul 2021
i admire him.
from the first moment
i caught his glimpse,
i've admired him.
a will so sheer and strong.
no armour would resist.
it's just that, when our eyes meet,
i feel a connection that runs so deep.
intelligent, benevolent and true,
these words are for you.
the loyal friend, the genuinest soulmate.
all i do, is for you.
i hope you get the meaning
behind all of the things i do;
i wish we'd already meet again,
so that my lips would never
feel so lonely again.
so my empty gaze
would have something to look happily at.
so you and i could
be together, forever,
as we'd promised each other,
time and time again.
Jul 2021 · 963
nim Jul 2021
i am a sword
that acts as a shield
and, thus, falls apart.
Jul 2021 · 411
a phase
nim Jul 2021
face after face,
i put an X on your face.
cross out all of you wonders,
one wonder after another.
drown you in the spine fluid;
blend you in with the memories.
do not miss me, for i
was just a little phase.
Jul 2021 · 414
nim Jul 2021
a leaf falls onto the bench,
completely mute. you pick
it up, begging it to make a sound.
i wonder why, it won't work wonders;
i wonder why, has it fallen down,
i wonder why, are we all
just leaves, now
on the ground?
Jun 2021 · 163
nim Jun 2021
i hid in the dark,
i'm sorry it consumed you too.
Jun 2021 · 58
death, to you
nim Jun 2021
oh my, oh my,
how deeply i want to die;
it's around here, it's over there,
i'm having an affair with death!
but he beats me & i'm scared,
my eyes fall out, my cheeks get crushed,
oh my, oh my,
what a beautiful lie!
to disappear & not exist,
but to live, i persist;
because i love you, i do not,
oh, death, you really ****.
your skull is dull,
your eyes are dark,
your bones that touch
my crystal necklace,
and my amethyst lungs
filled with empty awe.
you repeat yourself,
over and over again
it ***** me in,
your words claim
"it'll be over", but
it will be over.
oh my, oh my,
what a beautiful lie;
my reflection stares back
as i down another bottle.
not even smokes help,
instead of high there's a fog,
i do not eat, i eat too much,
im really sensitive,
no, im not.
oh! i am sorry,
but not for what i claim,
my other side's
got the best of me.
i wonder where
is the rest of me.
Apr 2021 · 674
the call of the void.
nim Apr 2021
i write empty words
with a lot of emotions in me;
hidden meaning only i see.
it's the only place where i can hide
from the slick voice that
makes me leave others behind.
the voice, it says
it's just my nature
but i'm not so sure,
though it can feel like home;
i'm not so sure,
i want to hurt anymore.
Apr 2021 · 2.3k
paris balcony
nim Apr 2021
cigarette ashes
fly on the wind,
as i stare at my black coffee,
it gazes back at me.
black sobranie,
and i debate;
of all the people,
i find it hard to see
is there something
worth seeking.
just like dust,
i let them go
i never looked back
let them think i'm bore.
you may be
a world unseen,
yet i am so tired
no words flow well enough.
i'll just go lose myself
in paint and doubt
while i stare at my coffee,
and flit around.
Apr 2021 · 155
life is kinda strange
nim Apr 2021
i need to sit
and catch my breath
'cause i can't stand
what's going on,
i need a minute
to just hold on.
the world is too fast,
it's spinning about,
i need to stop,
oh, god, help me down.
i need to sit
and cry it out,
i wish emotions
would come out.
it's all blurry,
i'm always in a hurry,
i wish i could
just break the clock
that's ticking down,
make the time
count down.
'cause god, i need to breathe,
but these things
are killing me.
oh god, just one breath,
in the rain, i suffocate.
it all comes down,
it's crashing now,
but i just sit
and try to breathe.
Jan 2021 · 75
i did the right thing
nim Jan 2021
but what's the cost?
i'm picking the good choice,
so why is it picking back at me?
Dec 2020 · 36
the antagonist
nim Dec 2020
"Everyone's a protagonist of their own
story. That's what I thought", he said,
turning to face me:

"Until I met you.
Deliberately ruining
everything you succeed in.
Making destruction of yourself be art.
And allowing nobody else to learn it."

he kept walking towards me.
After a few steps,
he stopped in his tracks.

"Are you not tired...

...of being the villain,
in your own story?"

I left out a single sigh,
and turned around.
Then I kept doing
I do best,

And stabbed myself in the heart.
Nov 2020 · 154
hold my hand
nim Nov 2020
hold my hand
and even if it
falls apart,
just know;
you'll assemble me anew.
the world is ours to pursue.
Nov 2020 · 119
water the dead
nim Nov 2020
i was told to water my
silly little flowers
even though they've withered.
they bowed down, all the way
to the silly little ground.
but i think
i should just cut them,
deprive those stupid snakes of life.
because the dead flowers bit me,
and their poison still runs in my mind.
sometimes, i think that
the unseen flowers of evil
will be the last thing i'll see.

so, god help me,
if i don't deprive
these meaningless flowers

of life.
Nov 2020 · 251
trip to Neverland
nim Nov 2020
give me a reason to exist
numbing the pain, i persist
to go on, even if it's meaningless
and even if i've never felt less

take my hand
now crush it, let me die
hoarding the skies of Neverland
let me live a beautiful lie

the sky is dull, my life's on line
to paint the sky, i must try
so it can be a miracle and shine
and i can finally go on and cry

i like the lies you tell
your lips convince me as you speak
i let the truth escape and leak
you caught me, but that's why i fell
Nov 2020 · 481
your aura
nim Nov 2020
tonight, your aura shines
the moon enhances your light
and our love gets intertwined;
your gasps fill my lungs with awe
as you lay there, more beautiful than ever
to your angelic energy, i surrender
even though i may be the devil
Oct 2020 · 87
nim Oct 2020
maybe i am mourning my own death;
perhaps i've been dying for far too long
Oct 2020 · 51
the ground is shaky
nim Oct 2020
the ground is shaking.
a needle pierced my heart.
my lungs are ripped, too.
bleeding through the holes.
bleeding out of my mouth.
bleeding out, i'm bleeding out.

please, don't make a sound
as i lie on the ground
because everything familiar
is now disappearing
and i'm left like a stray dog
here, on this shaky ground.

the ground is shaking.
the earth is trembling.
the ground is shaky.
the earth is heavy.

don't leave me alone
in this pool of tears
as my world burns down,
as my temple for you
crashes down.
Oct 2020 · 35
fingers crossed
nim Oct 2020
fingers crossed
& eyes blessed;
your sweet melody
puts me to rest.

you took the
water, out of my lungs,
grabbed my hand,
and pulled me ashore.

i wanted to drown
but now i'm just drawn
to someone amazing like you,
why you like me, i've no clue.

maybe there is hope
for a lowlife like me;
maybe i can steal
some of your love,
for a coward like me.

perhaps you're the only one
to make me feel alive
perhaps i like this unusual sensation
even when he's just
holding my face in his palms.

maybe magic's real?
or is it just a fantasy?
whatever it be,
i keep my fingers crossed
for this never-ending dream.
i love you.
Oct 2020 · 223
death is mimicking my gait
nim Oct 2020
soft footsteps in my ears
a melodic pain, in my head
her gaze at my back
and her hand
on my shoulders

and so, death sits
next to me,
keeping me company

and so, death weeps and laughs,
it's driving me mad.
her hazy cries and whimpers;
they're tearing me apart

she mimics my gait
i'm losing my faith
i'm starting to steep,
i've never been so weak
Jun 2020 · 573
poetry, my little fairy
nim Jun 2020
poetry, poetry;
my little fairy,
i cut open my wrist
and lovely daisies blossomed!

poetry, tiny pretty ghost,
is it a good sign?
would you heal me, please?
i feel their roots in my veins...

poetry, you silly phantom,
it isn't pleasant anymore!
they're ******* my blood,
there's vultures in my bloodflow.

poetry, silver fanged wraith,
your roots are in my bones,
it's a temple crushing down.
the past is hunting me down.

poetry, my little fairy.
i'm nothing more than dust.
i love you, but i fall apart.
you brought my old demons back.

poetry, my little fairy;
i cut my wrist open,
and lovely rotten daisies bloomed!
Jan 2020 · 154
nim Jan 2020
Baby, the sun is setting down
And I'm done taking chances;
I promise not to make a sound,
Let's communicate with soft glances.

I've been on a run, just like you
A getaway from me,
Just like you.

I'd like to leave a note,
A soft goodbye.

But Fate won't let me,
Said we tied a knot.

You and me,
Versus all of the odds.

Nobody knows,
But neither do we.

For you and I,
We just used to be.

And so, I'll be calm for now
With the knowledge that sings me to sleep,
A sweet lullaby, for just you and me.

This time,
I will let Fate
Do her own thing

And sing me to sleep,
Amongst the salty tears.
Sep 2019 · 77
nim Sep 2019
i am lost
Aug 2019 · 65
nim Aug 2019
moon, you brutal lover,
keeping all of my secrets
yet never sharing yours.

still, i find comfort when I'm with you;
my solitude and sorrow
merging with your soft light
slowly turning into one

show me yourself
i need you right now
i'm fading away

don't be shy,
you're the one
who knows who i am

because tonight
your company is my only medicine
May 2019 · 361
Cupid doesn't pick
nim May 2019
pretty, pretty
what a pity;
they say it's pretty stupid,
but i got hit by Cupid

pretty silly,
and i like it, really
Apr 2019 · 88
a rainy day
nim Apr 2019
rain is slowly dripping
down my umbrella;
soft, orange and brown leaves
still stick to my shoes

the misty fog soon discovers
the path ahead of me,
white flowers on the trees
are whispering a soft hello.

i hope, i really hope
you'll one day see
the beauty in peace

i hope, i really hope
you'll find in the world
what i found in you.
Apr 2019 · 79
won't you look at me?
nim Apr 2019
i want your presence
which floods me like waves on a stormy morning,
unforeseen and dangerous, swinging my base of life

can i steal a hug?
or a moment of your time?
just to tell you that
i see and seek your heart,
even for seconds,
if you could be mine...

if you'd turn your gaze to me,
hell, why won't you look at me?
hell, when did we grow apart?

i remember chasing each other
when the time wasn't right,
but will there ever come our time?

won't you look at me, look at me now?

if we can go back...
to how we used to be
before we
and i
Apr 2019 · 88
a riddle
nim Apr 2019
hidden, hidden
riddle me a riddle
your nails so black
rest on your face
while you're looking away,
a wondering gaze

it's like i can almost hear your mind
struggling to figure out;
"four feet, one heart, no spines, a turning clock",
you try the taste of the words

it is where I'm taking you, and me


one heart,
I'll do it
in the name
of love
Apr 2019 · 103
act 1
nim Apr 2019
i could be the best actor
pretend i don't care

but it's all in vain
when you are not
looking at my stage
Mar 2019 · 97
nim Mar 2019
and in the dark
you long for your muse;
calling her name
needing her to inspire you

to embolden the blood in your veins
to embrace the void in your eyes

to flip your world around,

to fill your soul with love

you long for your muse.
Feb 2019 · 61
once, it was your number
nim Feb 2019
hate me
for i deserve no good,
for i do my best;
but it is also my worst.

hate me,
leave me brokenhearted
with pain and apathy
and with just a stranger's number on my phone

once, it was your number
and all of my comfort and my heart;
i didn't know things would fall apart
once you were gone...

hate me
then you'll know
what being me
truly feels like

hate me
because now a stranger
uses your number
and if I called you
i knew i could never hear your voice
Feb 2019 · 306
nim Feb 2019
there's a calm rage inside of me
and a furious gratitude
Jan 2019 · 402
nim Jan 2019
soft cries
in your arms
silky layers
covering our secrets
murmuring words of
affection and love
let's be together,
your hand in mine
until the world is gone
Next page