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Nov 2018 · 72
Blue Melancholy Nov 2018
Depression is a *****.
I never thought she would creep up on me at school like this.

That ***.
This is a poem I wrote at school....

Nov 2018 · 229
Blue Melancholy Nov 2018
Cold, comforting,
Sleeping, smiling, breathing,
The gentle cold, the brutal heat
Sweating, tossing, turning,
Hot, uncomfortable,
The past two poems were for an English project
Blue Melancholy Nov 2018
Her feminine hands
Ran through her shimmering,
Golden locks

The gentle strands
Felt soft
Between her fingers

Her gray-mint eyes closed
and she could almost hear
The frush of the golden yarn
As it rubbed up against itself

The smokey scent
Of the California air
Caressed her senses

And the silent taste
Of her saliva
Followed soon thereafter
This poem is literally just about me running my hands through my hair and breathing I think...
Nov 2018 · 2.9k
You, Me, Us, We
Blue Melancholy Nov 2018
With your words
The Knife.

Knowing and not knowing,
Afraid and clueless.

A thing that used to be,
The dust on the mantle.

Will never be the same
The blood that was spilled across the floor.

This crime scene filled with pain and sorrow and regret.  The murderer and the victim one in the same—but also separate.  Two hearts that both dance to the same miserable song.
Oof...  I wrote this one a while ago...

(Also this poem is dedicated to my father, like a like a lot of my poems)
Blue Melancholy Oct 2018
I love you.
Platonically of course.
But I love you.

You make
me feel okay
as a whole
not a piece hidden

You don't seem
bothered by
any part my me
even the crazy

My dear friend,
you had better not lie to me.

Don't hide away
your heart from me.
I want to see

All the scuffs
all the scars
all the cracks
all the tears


I don't care
how dark it gets
I live in darkness,
too, *****.

Don't think for a second
that I'll scare easily
Your struggles is not
on my list of phobias.

So please,

Don't hide
from me.
Don't lie
to me.

I don't like fake.
I don't want
to be friends
with a lie.

So please,
Trust me.

it'll be okay.
I won't hurt you.
If I did,
I would hate myself.

You know how I am.
I consider you my best friend, you... half-brit!
You had better believe it.
Jul 2018 · 582
Go Away.
Blue Melancholy Jul 2018
Go away.
Don't touch me.
Don't talk to me.
Just shut up,
Accept it,
And go away.

I don't want your endless apologies.
I don't want your insincere “sorries”
It's over.
I'm done.
Just **** it up
And go away.

Why can't you just let it go?
Why can't you just let me go!?
I don't want to “fix things”
I don't want to spend any more time with you.
All your time’s already been spent.
Stop pestering me
And go away.

Stop right there!
Whatever you're thinking…
Stop thinking it!
If you think I want to talk to you I don't!
Just turn around
and go away.

Get your face
Out of my face.
Stop breathing down my neck!
Stop hovering hoping I'll talk to you
Just leave me alone
And go away.

This feels like some kind of bad relationship that died years ago!
That s how long you've gone without taking a hint!
Do you seriously think I want to fix things!?
Or is that just your fantasy?
‘Cause I'm telling you right now…
There's no way in heck
You're ever getting that from me.

So shut up.
Leave me alone.
I already gave you your second... and third… and eighth chances.
And you spent them.
You spent them all.
So I'm done.
I'm sick of it.
I'm ending it right here.
My ever-ending patience has been worn through.
Now I'm through.
I'm through with your games
I'm through with you
So if you don't,
Then I will…

…go away…
for those who just need to go away
Jul 2018 · 228
No, not now.
Blue Melancholy Jul 2018
Emotion surged through me.
It flooded my eyes.

"Not now."
"I can't deal with you right now."
"I don't have the time or the energy
to deal with you right now."

Like a child, it pokes and prods,
begging, with pleading eyes,
for my attention.

"Not now."
"Get away from me!"

It tugs at my lower eyelids.
Similar to the way
a child tugs at your shirt
when it wants attention.

I shove it away from me,
I insist,
"Not now!"
"Leave me..."

I shove it through the doorway
and slam the door behind it.

I shout as I slam the door.

Slamming my weight
upon the wooden door
to make sure nothing can open it.
I slump down to the floor
before the wooden door.

It twists and turns at the doorknob
but to no avail.
A doorstop,
shaped like
a troubled-minded

slams her weight
onto the wooden board with hinges,
making it pop open
for a fraction of a second
before slamming
back into its socket in the wall.

"I told you to go away!"

It cries out to me.


It whines.
I stand up,

"I said..."

I slam my hand onto the door,
It lets out a little whimper
as the door rattles in its place.


I shove my hand,
in a violent motion,
onto the doorknob.


I **** the doorknob


I shout
as I wham the door open
in a violent fury.

There is nothing there.

"Where'd you go you lil' ****!?"

I stomp one foot
through the doorway
and peek around the hallway.

I coolly step
back into the room
and calmly
shut the door.
I turn around.
There It is.
Sitting right there,
Innocently kicking Its legs,
staring me directly in the eyes.

There is no escape
from overwhelming emotion.

The tears pour down my cheeks.
This actually uses a child (like an annoying younger sibling or some ****) to symbolize an emotional outburst...   :´)

This is also one of my most proud works
Jul 2018 · 72
I don't miss you. (Lies!)
Blue Melancholy Jul 2018
I don't miss you.
I don't miss you one bit.
I don't miss a thing about you.
I don't miss any of that ****.

I don't miss your lies.
I don't miss your *******.
I don't miss your dishonesty.
I don't miss it, I hate it.

I don't miss the way
you never understood.
Or the playful way
you'd take off my hood.

I don't miss the way
we'd banter, and playfully argue.
I don't miss your stupid smile,
or the love I gave you.

I don't miss your hands.
Yours and mine intertwine.
I don't miss your stupid smile,
or those beautiful brown eyes.

I don't miss the way you loved me
just for being who I am.
I don't miss the way you'd blush
when I spontaneously grabbed your hand.

I don't miss the long list of songs
that were perfect for us.
I don't miss all the little things
that we had in common.

I don't miss your eyes.
I don't miss your smile.
I don't miss your love
I thought would last for a while.

Oh ****, I do miss you.
This is all just a lie.
Oh how I wish that these feelings
would just wither and die.

Oh, how I wish
I could just let you go.
Oh, how I wish
I could let you know.

How badly I wanted
to fling my arms
around to embrace you.
but I was just
too embarrassed to.

I wanted to love you
I wanted to kiss you
I wanted to do these things.
But I didn't,
so now I miss you.

I loved you.
I thought you loved me.
I thought we would always
be together and happy.

But I did too many things,
and I "didn't do enough."
Fear drove me the wrong way.
now there is no more love.

Now I'm left.
Dying, sad and alone,
on the inside.
Wondering what and who
and where and how
and why.

Just what could I do,
to make you stay.
So I didn't have to miss you
like this today.
I hate it that I still love you.
Jun 2018 · 268
I Dreamed of You
Blue Melancholy Jun 2018
Last night I dreamed
That we were back together
We kissed and made up,
And it was all better.

I wrapped you in my arms
The way I always wanted to
I kissed you on your face
To show how much I loved you.

We walked home together
Just like we used to.
I miss that a lot,
But not more than being with you.

Then this morning it hit me,
It hurt when I realized
None of that was real,
and then I cried.
For my first and only ex...
I really thought I loved you
May 2018 · 552
Bad Days
Blue Melancholy May 2018
Bad days are like small doses of pain,
to show what dying tastes like.
When I say bad day,
I mean more bad than the usual bad way.

I made some bad choices,
used all the wrong voices.
Said all the wrong words,
acted like a total ****.

When I do these things,
I hate myself.  I don't feel better.
Sometimes it lasts a few days,
sometimes weeks.

Depression really doesn't help me,
it makes me feel not-so-happy.
Then I get punished for the things I do,
when I get depressed. But, you.

You don't care,
You don't believe me,
What does it matter?
It's not like I can feel happy.

oh wait-

Yes it's possible,
I can do some things,
so I feel less awful.
But, wait—that's right—you won't let me.
This **** happens to me all the time
Mar 2018 · 135
For My History Class
Blue Melancholy Mar 2018
I am American,
Just like them.
I was born here,
Just like them.

What makes me different?
I don’t know.
But they took me
From my home.

I thought that I
Was just like them.
I thought that I
Was “American.”

I have to eyes,
A nose, a mouth.
So what’s the
Segregation about?

I know they act
Because they’re afraid.
But that doesn’t make
It all okay.

They lock us up,
They think we’re spies.
I sit with my tears,
And wonder why.

They call us “****”
Derogatory term
They say “get out”
They say cruel words.

They do not know
what the words they say mean.
Because they wouldn’t say anything
To hurt me…

This was written for the group of people who have had direct experience with Japanese Internment Camps, they come to my school each year.
Mar 2018 · 965
Blue Melancholy Mar 2018
Roses are red,
violets are blue,
but according to what I learned in science about how light works...
That's not really true...
You see, when light hits something,
say a leaf, it looks green.
But in reality it's every colour but the one you see.

Roses are green
Violets are green
The amount of vivid colours in this garden made me throw up.

Roses are red,
violets are red,
I lit my garden on fire.

Roses are blue
Violets are red
What are colours again?

Roses are red,
violets are red,
someone killed my cat.

Roses are yellow,
Violets are purple,
I think I might be colourblind.

Roses are grey,
Violets are also grey,

Roses are dead.
Violets are dead.
I'm a horrible gardener...

My name is Dave,
Roses are Paul,
It hurt my head,
when I walked into that wall.
The poet's guide to weirdly dark roses are red poems.
All of these are 100% original... except for the last one... one of my friends wrote it.
Mar 2018 · 2.6k
Me (πーπ)
Blue Melancholy Mar 2018
Twists and turns
winds and binds.
That's the labyrinth of my mind.

Lost, confused,
bewildered, bemused.
Wonder where, wonder who?

Losing, winding,
wondering, finding?
What could this capsule be hiding?

Broken, tattered,
torn and shattered.
That's the story of my heart.

Waking, shaking,
aching, breaking.
What could this ceramist be making?

Aching, crying,
screaming, lying.
Is this the way I should be dying?

Plain, boring,
pail, zombie.
That's the sculpture of my body.

Cold, lanky,
shivering, shaking.
Why is something always aching?

Not too good,
not too bad.
I have nothing, so, why be glad?

My body may not be unhealthy,
but inside I'm a total train wreck.
Oh, ****...  She's using the analogies to describe herself now
Mar 2018 · 2.1k
Love? Hate?
Blue Melancholy Mar 2018
I love you.
You heal me.
You are the sun that wakes me,
You are the voice that comforts me,
You are the best person ever!

I hate you.
You hurt me.
You are the hand that hit me,
You are the voice that frightens me,
You are the worst person ever!

I love you.
You are a shoulder to cry on,
You are the hug I need,
You're okay, I guess...

I hate you.
You are the reason I cry!
You are the one that hurts me,
I'm afraid to be around you.

I miss you.
I miss the person you used to be,
before the pain,
before the tears,
before you hurt me.
Okay, so- hurt ("you hurt me") is supposed to be past tense, but heal is supposed to be present tense.
I wrote the first stanza from the perspective of my younger self, and then it kind of alternates between younger me and present time me.
This was actually the poem I used to get onto this site... I love this poem, it was the second real poem I wrote and it is probably my favourite.
Mar 2018 · 337
A Love(?) Poem
Blue Melancholy Mar 2018
I was inspired by a song,
It reminded me of you.
By Linkin Park...
my favourite album too...

I felt that I should write a poem,
For that's what I do...
When I get a feeling
I can't understand,
With words I can't describe.

Sometimes you make me happy,
Sometimes you make me sad,
Mostly you make me angry,
Which usually makes you glad.

My salt makes you grin,
Your grin makes me scowl,
Your salt makes me laugh,
Which cuts into your soul.

You always have that ****** grin,
that stupid ******* flirtatious grin.
The stupid face you make,
when you think you win.

You act like you know,
like you know who I am...
You act like you think
that you understand.

You act like you know,
but you don't know ****.
You think you understand,
but you don't get it!

You act like if you were asked how,
You could give the Dictionary definition,
of how I feel, but now
I need you to listen.

Not even I know how I feel!
So how could you?
I can't be with you,
But I really want to!

I think that I love you,
But I know that I can't.
If I give into this feeling...
It'll get out of hand!

I'll lose my grip.
I'll lose control!
I'll let something slip,
or so I'm told...

I long for something
that I can love!
For something real
that I didn't make up.

I want something
that I can't lose...
I want someone
to hold onto!

I long for something,
or maybe someone,
that can undo the things,
that others have done.
This was dedicated to my unofficial boyfriend...  I thought I loved him...
Blue Melancholy Mar 2018
When I think of you
I go insane.
I try to find
some kind of pain.
Pain so bad,
you wouldn't think to cry.
You won't be sad...
But you'll wish to die!
Feelings of anger
Fill my head...
I constantly wish
That you would be dead.
That you would die
and I would **** you
but I can't,
'cuz that's illegal...
When I see you around town,
I hope you feel
The pain I do
When you're around.
Dedicated to my father-
you'll find that most of my deepest and best poems are
Blue Melancholy Mar 2018
All these happy, loving, clueless people have assigned
certain colours to the holiday that comes at this time.
They assigned it vibrant, happy shades of pink and red.
But I see it fit for shades of blue instead.
Because blue is the colour of every tear...
every tear shed on this "happy" time of year.
Every poor lonely kid left alone...
every poor kid with a valentine count of none.
Every kid who greets this holiday only with despair.
While everyone else greets it with "Love is in the air!"
And to anyone who feels alone,
To anyone who feels like they have no one...
You're not alone, so look up on this day!
You don't need balloons, or cards, or confetti.
You don't need others' validation to make you happy.
You don't need to put on a special show,
for them to "love" you, for you to know...
That you are special...
You are loved...
You are beautiful...
You are good...
You are important...
You are strong...
You are amazing...
You belong...
You are not alone.
You know who you are,
I've no need to say.
You might feel like the last option...
but I bet you're someone's first option, they think about you every day.
You may not feel special...
And you may feel small...
But you can do anything.
Overcome it all.
All the things you think you can't,
All the things I know you can.

Happy Valentine's Day ( ̄з ̄)
I had originally tried to get this into the school morning announcements... But they wouldn't put it in so...

— The End —