You walked into the butcher shop eyes of blue determination asked me to hand you the cow heart. Still beating, i let it slip into you hot palm letting the blood trickle down our arms as our fingers featherd each others wrists. You took the corpse and slipped it deep into your jean pocket like a secret love affair.
You asked me if i wanted to go swimming sometime. It was not a question. I cordially accept your wet invitation.
We splashed in the melted blue like children yet unbroken by the cruelties of living.
We ate each other. Starving you told me i was the first meal you had in months and i, so innocently believed you.
The next day you invited me over for dinner. It was not a question. Full on **** i accepted
Hot you opened the kitchen door quickly and whispered down my spine, my body like lava erupting before we made it to the first course.
On the dinner table lay the butchered heart. Still beating you asked me to take the first bite, and i, brimming with your desire- did
I swallowed it like a rock. pulsating through my core, shaking my small frame.
You kissed my stomach.
The next day i awoke in cold sweats. Feverish Vomiting up my stomach lining chunky and undigested.
I left you three messages.
Sick. White. Quaking. I waited.
Disintegrating into myself. The flesh melting off my body like a landslide. A hurricane in slow motion.
you skinned me like a thanksgiving turkey left me on your kitchen table to be picked at by the angry flies. A slow meticulous death.
You said “look into my eyes.” And i was so lost in the blue i allowed you to take the knife right to the place where the world begins.
I was so in love with an idea.
I ate your heart without question not understanding that you cannot consume someone into loving you.
What goes in must come out.
Now, what is left of our **** lines the bathroom sink.
A bath of blood and bile I obsessively pick though trying to discern where I went wrong.
can’t look directly at your white hot heat burns my eyes burns my soul maybe makes me weak maybe hurts my hands makes me sing in a public place for awhile before i catch myself catch myself sighing catch myself feeling myself maybe thinking about you while i feel myself maybe i’m crazy maybe you’re crazy or maybe the sky tonight is the darkest blue it’s ever been and maybe that has something to do with it