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Sometimes feels overwhelming
Adrenaline begins flowing
I hate having anxiety
Fear and uncertainty growing
Self diagnosed anxiety
 Aug 2019 unnamed
Ithaca
happiness?!
 Aug 2019 unnamed
Ithaca
One friend is depressed.
Yesterday was the greatest, and today seems an unwelcome guest.

One friend is afraid.
He writes of his struggles, but if you saw him, you’d say he’s got it made.

I am who I’ve always and never been.
Consistently inconsistent, pervertedly malevolent, and searching for something that doesn’t seem to exist for me.

I want to help my friends.
insert{[but statement]+[excuse]}
Everything seems to be an excuse for doing nothing. I can’t trust myself anymore.
 Aug 2019 unnamed
eileen
glitter washed down the drain
off like my friends
I forget their names
they know I live in vain
counting my veins
waiting to rip one open

money hungry
I foolishly believed
she'd always love me
never more
counting off what I owe her

he doesn't ask for me
robotic or stoic
he doesn't ask me why I'm crying
driving off
I was feeling manic
he doesn't understand it

you don't know me
wandering
maybe you have the key
if I let you in
will you find me
 Aug 2019 unnamed
Bummer
I think when you kiss me you can taste the "I'm sorry" on my lips.


That must get annoying.
 Aug 2019 unnamed
Ithaca
Bummer
 Aug 2019 unnamed
Ithaca
I don’t know you like you know yourself
All I know is what you write, because we never really talk, and that’s my problem

It makes me sad to hear that you’ve experienced death in your life
Death is a ***** ***** **** waffle ****
And there’s my **** nonsense of humor

I don’t think you’re crazy like you say
I’ve heard rumors
**** em

I was a fool for thinking anyone could be perfect
I’m sorry for putting you on that pedestal
I realize now that you are, in fact, human and have weaknesses and flaws as such

God, this sounds ridiculous

I want to delete every word of this, and sew the mask of a quiet loner back on my face, and that is exactly why I am posting this. To work to overcome my own biggest fear. Rejection.
 Aug 2019 unnamed
Bummer
I pressed my palms against the clouds to keep the sky from falling down, when you were weak, I would keep you safe and sound.
I have this pulsing in my veins from all these ******* growing pains, And I'll feel weak, but my heart will feel the same way.
 Aug 2019 unnamed
Bummer
I'm not satisfied with you.

Hell, I don't even like you.

I've put my time into you,

My tears into you,

Even my confidence into you.

And still you fail me.
And still you disappoint me.

I've drafted my work and practiced my craft.
I've read from the greats, and still I'm not content.

Do I need to include a ******* metaphor for me to like this?
Maybe give it an overtone of gloom and despair?

My poetry is a name on an old tombstone.
Unread and dead.
My pen is in the hands of an "Artist,"
Who's words will never be said.


I'm not satisfied with you.

Hell, I don't even like you.

But so long as I have a pen In my hand,

Ill try to get a little better.
i don't like my poems.
 Aug 2019 unnamed
Bummer
i’m cold and I want to cry.
I know you’re on my side, but I want you by my side.
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