Hurled, entwined, the eyes go black,

Steel sarcophagus, demons stare back,

A glimpse so foul, of the abyss,

My life, it ends, possibility is missed,

The blood, gooey warm, and slick,

Lubrication of foulest finery and sick,

Glass shattering in mindless trance,

Thrown in the air to land on our back,

Twisted, cruelly formed, we look in oblivion,

Nothing sacred, it fits my life's ruin,

"Take me now Azrael, for I fear you not,"

Death will allow me to find peace and rot,

Worried, fearful, the gore too much,

Too little for my hands to touch,

Scalp displayed, upon landing safe,

I cry out, calming and wait,

The blood drips down upon my hand,

The pale skin turns sanguine, I find it hard to stand,

Entombed in metal, a twisted turn of fate,

She leaps to thought, I caress her cheek,

"Safe, be still, I'm here" I repeat.

I relocate my shoulder, a sickening pop

stomach turning pain, the faint I stop.

I wrench the door, and run around,

I rip hers open and rip casing to the ground,

Too shocked to cry, I gaze upon the wound,

I assess it as severe, although life is imbued,

_

CALL FOR HELP

I scream like the Devil.

My wrath for nothing but fear of loss

Drives my fury for her safety lost,

I hold a bandage to her head, and wait the eternal wait,

Speaking comforting lies, hoping they were true, and damning my own fate,

I hold her close and kiss her cheek,

I wipe the blood from my lips and realize I am weak.

"God, I'd give my life for her to heal"

Maybe it's a nightmare, this cannot be real.

-

In safety's arms, I still cry out,

I'M FINE, SEE TO HER, in doubt,

I leave my bed to wander the halls,

Searching for my name be called,

To be exhaled through the lips of a love,

To find my heart flutter, the wings of a dove,

The sight of her stabbed my eyes,

"Something so precious...", myself I despised.

I fought my way to her, and was almost placed in arrest,

I returned calm, I'm no help in duress,

I stand by her side and kiss her hand,

As my heart died, she smiled, I could stand.

function here in waves,
playful rose of fractal dance between the ashen
i-am-nesses fused --
what else can say existence
like you   are like me?
that atoms mine are yours
coinciding kinds
in kind collide in braving symbols wide.
no interference holds amid the swing
from dark to light,
eternal constancy
of varied essence striking
joy on joy a smitten fullness-
breath of overcoming desperation's wrath
regrown particulates of god undead
of final unities no longer dark,
no longer merely one among






.

I know why the heart contracts and squeezes like a lucky python.
I know why it drives salty tears
and drunk nights
and endless painkillers.
Love is a killer that has no grounds
for saving
And I am aware that my heart is trying to escape its wrath,
trying to get to its desire
Its destination
It wants to eat her
It wants to swallow her whole

Do you ever search for the answer
Are we truly so empty inside
When hate and greed breed like cancer
Our song of insanity is turning the tide
The blood of the innocent runs free
We are starting to lose all control
When people covet all that they see
A darkness consuming the soul
Know it is mine if I take it
That it was yours means nothing at all
Compassion we know we can fake it
If conscience just happens to call
As we step on the promises we make
Lies are all that you keep
Giving so much less than you take
Listen, and hear your god weep
People kill because they can do it
Consequence no deterrent at all
When all hope is lost
             Ya just gotta say screw it
Wrath of god lay waste to us all.            Hy

Don’t use that word
that loveless, cheap hotel card with that sham of a fine print
don’t ignite my wrath
by devaluing it’s worth, or even giving it power
ignore it’s event like I do
a purity ring
a shackled serf
don’t cheapen my experience with your experience
of what is mine
don’t touch me
swallow me whole
engross me, emboss yourself into my body
don’t touch me
don’t even bring yourself to touch me
I've been rattled out of my lithe little girl's ribcage
child's innocence
shaken out of my hair
I've been mauled by foreign hands
I've been contained by religious crusaders
I've been trampled by meaning
I've been impaled by silence
I've been wretched from love
I've been stolen by hades
I've become the defining moment of your ego's shameless pride
my meaning has been baffled
it has been led
it has dived instead
to the groves of the underworld
divided in two parts for this equinox of existence
my child’s fingers
pried, wretched, from its golden enlightenment
pulled
by the untouch
and the wrong touch
the false meaning
and the absent truth
I am a survivor
I am my own caged victim
I keep her in my stomach
hidden behind my intestines
immersed in my guts
and my bruised pride
that is where I keep her
from you
and the sensations you evoke
the feeling that rattles my nerves
and twists them in confusion
I don’t want to hear your caricature
of my painful soul twisting experience
or HERS
I am enraged!
I am grieving!
I am rejecting!
I am pleading!
I am split from the genitalia up
and the heart down
DONT REMIND ME
please don’t send me into Vietnam
when I am simply relaxing my levied body into your bed
I haven’t the control
PUSH, PUSH, PUSH
PULL, PULL, PULL
SEVER, SEVER
they send me out
he pulls me in
I send me out
I hope to be tugged gently somewhere far away
different from here
in hopes of a real man
a saintly man, devoid of churchly meaning
and satanic undertaking
to embrace me while my fractures are filled
with porcelain
comfort me in my tears
with your humble arms, hands, thumbs
I’ve lived nightmares
that can’t even be rendered from medieval children’s stories
I am under constant running faucets of pain
I am the active participant in my own narcosis
the sound of screaming children sends me into rooms of interrogation
into a meaning of my own
the death of the world’s morality
sends me into spiraling questions of my own
I am sweating from my own polygraph
I am juggling an urge for a spiritual and triumphant out of place uproar
in a quiet, unassuming, un-related home
I am running barefoot after the stars
until my heart hemorrhages
until my lungs collapse
until my feet are caked with sharp rocks
until these rivers from my eyes run cracked dry
tears pooled from somewhere so deep and treacherous
I dont even know where the water is kept
even with my own fingers in the dam
I trust not the water of prisons
I cannot come within proximity of these wound
You slaughterer of divine innocence
You godless heathen
sacrificing the bodies of small celestial creatures
at the bonfire of your debauched and putrid humanity
you thief of love and light
of trust
and connection
I cannot bring myself into the inner reaches of love for fear of the inner reaches of you
I am reverted to the first thought to imprint upon my soft mind
the soft mind of a small and unsupervised animal
but I can only touch it with my lips and my imagination
unable to bring it behind my mouth
for what pain it has caused me
what paralysis it wrought into me
In my quiet, exhausted body
as it's administered to
in its aloofness
by my own lovely composure of compassion
in it's illuminated internal insight
flittering trust in cosmic righteousness
do I also come to bolster faith
that this baser nature will one day be sanctified
like a burning house, full of plagued infested linen
de-shelved like memories of pain on loop
so myself and all the other victimized creatures can find rest upon thier weary eyelids

And lovely must these Potent Shadows bloom
To whose Foreign Masklettes we must Remind
That Forceps - or whatever clasps the Gloom
'Tis better to Uplift and Throw behind
So I Noticed of Numb Silences fill,
Be Favoured versus the Pursuit of Wrath
For whose Grapes the Wrinkled Author did spill
And cause those Trenches quake on my behalf
Lessons pile Lessons more. And then by tripe
Sort from which Squares and Sly Spheres do Predict
Which Way is turned; Or Algorithms bite
Bend Points and Sinuses by Derelict.
Still those Shadows stand; As induced by so
Which of your Sexes be the first to go.

The sun wakes up with the warmest smile
And flowers bloom in a fragrant pile
The zenith high and the sea below
Witness how you age and grow

A tingle underneath your sheet
Makes your slumber slip underneath your feet
As you look up to the numbers far
It’s your birthday! Says the calendar

While your heart beats fast for what’s in store
Should your guests come knocking at your door?
Or your friends and pals and sweetheart too
Would they be there to celebrate with you?

Remember that through all the pain
And the wisdom through those years you’ve gained
There’s a single one you didn’t find
In your parties or of such a kind

Yet He was there to share with you
The tears and wrath and gaiety too
Protect you from all sorts of harm
And embraces you to keep you warm

So on your birthday please don’t forget
To thank God for your every breath
For His love and light and countless bliss
Who deserves the biggest hug and kiss

Today as you add up another year
To the digits of your age my dear
Remember Him and all those who
Make your life and dreams do come true

But of course don’t ever odd me out
From your list of memorable laugh and shout
I’m your friend who wishes the best there are
For your birthday’s written in the stars.