I wish I was still six
Life was so easy
My only worries were losing crayons
Or running out of games to play
And having recess be cancelled
Because it was raining too hard

I'd even go back to when I was eleven
Because life was pretty easy
And my worries were losing friends
Or running out of people to hang out with
And having parties cancelled
Because who would even come?

Being fifteen
It's far from easy
I worry about losing hope
Or running out of excuses of why I'm failing classes
And having plans be cancelled
Because its weird to have long sleeves on in the summer

a joy it would be to be loved
to have that sensation
of knowing there is a person
that cares more for you than words can explain

                                                             ­                                                                 ­   a joy it would be to be alone
                                                             ­                                                                 ­               to have the sensation
                                                             ­                                                                 ­ of knowing you can't be hurt
                                                             ­                                   that no one can be close enough to eat you alive

ignore the pain
ignore the worry
fall

                                                             ­                                                                 ­                   ignore the sadness
                                                             ­                                                                 ­                         ignore the pity
                                                             ­                                                                 ­                                       keep
                                                             ­            what a choice
                                                             ­                  love is
                                                             ­           logic or passion
                                                             ­            bliss or ration
                                                             ­              such a silly
                                                             ­       annoying chemical
                                                             ­                  love is

I am sorry if this hurts your feelings,
but writing poems about you
is more thrilling than loving you.

We are nuzzled in our bean-pod.
Our friends believe that honey hit our heads
when we slept, clandestine morning dew,
that stuck us together like glue.

It has not come apart yet,
saying you are not going anywhere
even if the gun-holders bust our seam.

I do not have to worry about you leaving
but that is why I do.

When you are not watching a pot,
it begins to boil,
& I watch it so hard I am writing about you
as I am in my underground
6AM consciousness, only awake in heart.

We are so okay
I have to think about you hurting me
to remember no one believes in infinity.

No one else is attached like us.
It is actually kind of boring to be eight
years younger than you, settled down
for everyone to laugh at & disbelieve.

But some of the things that sound so silly
make the most sense.

An assortment of experiences
Empirically gather
I’ve sampled the sacred nectar
I’ve climbed Jacob’s ladder
I’ve found to stay clear
Of both worry and fear
Is the key to longevity
In this life we hold dear
Yet the eyes of this world
Are more near than farsighted
And the strangers next door
Are rarely invited
Close-mindedness and fear
Are cultural building blocks
Compassion is an open gate
Indifference keeps it locked
Only love can mend
A world so far apart
The cure for global separation
Lies within our hearts

I wish I could forget you, leave behind the memories like you left me, but I can’t. You’re in the air I breathe, cutting up my lungs like pieces of glass and vodka drank all too quickly. Your scent is in my clothes and on my bed, snaking your way into my dreams at night. You’re in the coffee that I drink after sleepless nights; bitter and cold on my tongue but with the possibility of delicious warmth. You’re in the paths that I trudge down every day, reminding me of the times we spent there and the feelings that are now lost forever. I hate that you left me like this. All of these empty promises and a void so large no one could dream of filling it. You must not have ever loved me, because if you had it would have been impossible to just leave like you did, taking all of my heart with you. Packing it away in your suitcase along with the shirt I gave you and the books I’d lent. What did you do with the pictures of us? Would you try to forget and leave them in their frames, or did they not mean enough to you to even worry about and were thrown carelessly in the bottom of your bag? I hate the gaps you left in me. I’m broken and damaged now and you left with the cure to fixing me. This lovesick pain is getting tiresome and I hate that it isn’t wearing on you too. I thought I was someone you couldn’t live without. You sure as hell were to me. And what’s saddest of all is that if you came back now, I would run and throw my arms around you. Because I’ve already fallen as far as I can, there’s no need for me to be cautious now for I can’t slip farther down than I have. I would love to be someone that you need. Someone you can’t live without. I would be honoured to be the person you look at, the way that I looked at you. But I was just a passing spark for you, and you were my light. Just take back the memories like you took back everything else.

I saw her after some time, and recognizing her took me a while...
She had gained a lot of weight, mast be due to the stress and strain.
Unusual bags underneath her eyes,
Which once shone, are now engulfed in pain.
Her normally well-kept hair lies in a tangled mess.
Worry lines, spots, a frown and signs of stress.
seem to have taken the place,
of a once cheerful look created by the curve on her face.
She looks worn out, pale and weak.
As if she'd pass out if she tried to speak.
Drooped are her shoulders,
Gone is her smile,
To get back to who she was, is gonna take her a while.
But Alas! there is no turning back and fate is the only factor to blame.
Forced her to leave family , friends and the place she called home.
Burdened by the present, she realizes nothing's gonna stay the same.
So she stands up, and prepares to face life on her own.
Faces the future but tries to hold onto the slippery past.
In hopes of making those beautiful memories last.
She maybe called a fighter, but its getting harder...
She's on the verge of letting go...
"Don't lose faith in God, believe in a better tomorrow"
with a watery smile, to her i whisper.
"you're almost there, its just a little while longer"
are my departing words,
As i turn and walk away from the mirror.

I – Rain Over the Dying Empire
The Weather Forecast looks grim today
This mess won’t clear up any time soon
So button up your jackets and turn up your collars
And mark up your calendars for a time of grey skies
There’s a storm on the way
We’ll all be blown away
The reign will never end
Until we’re washed clean off the map
But don’t you worry darling viewers
Just find yourselves a shelter, you’ll be fine
Don’t go scrambling in the smog to find hope: it’s always there
It pains me to be the bringer of bad news
Oh! Dearest Public I always pride myself in saying Tomorrow will be a brighter day
But oh! My friends I also promised I would never lie to you
We have serious weather warnings on the way
They will ravage your livelihoods but don’t let them take your souls
We stand strong against the tide of the oncoming gale, the hail and the thunder
If they weather away each tiny bit of all you hold dear
Raise your fist to the angry sky and scream for what is right
I promise, one day, sunshine will be legal again
I’ve tried to make you laugh and I’ve tried to make you cry
But it’s difficult when describing the movements of cold air across the land
If you ignore the hot stuff blowing out of parliament these days
It’s possible to force a smile: a fraction of happiness for hollow promises
They know nothing of how to save the world, they just want to escape
They’re harvesting the strong so they can find another home
Sure, they bejewel their guillotine as it hangs above your throat
Because they think that you’re impressionable but my advice is let them think so
Because Nature wants out of the pact she made when God abandoned us here
And they just want revenge because she’s stronger than they’ll ever be
The Mother they used to love, that they cast down, has come to kiss them with her poison passion
She won’t ask for their forgiveness as she beats them down, begging for hers
I’ll leave you with my darkest secret since you probably won’t see me again
As they surround me I want to let you know it’s been incredible
Striding through the desert carrying you upon my shoulders
And so I’ll thank you and blow a goodnight kiss to you
If there’s anyone they’ve left alive
They have finally come for me
Goodbye

II – The Broken Figurehead Speaks
We interrupt this broadcast with a message from the high command
Good evening noble people, please ignore what you have just heard
And keep on working for our greater good
For as we all know, it is better than theirs
Regrettably, my tolerance is thin for behaviour like that of our darling Weather Reporter
And my mercy is negligible for those who stand against us…

III – Martyrdom for Sunshine
As I stand above the ocean, with the army at my back, looking out at this sunset
It feels like the first time I have seen such beauty
Though waves gallop into the cliff below there is a malleable peace
It penetrates to the deepest corner of my heart
As they load their guns and prepare to fire, I think of the others who they have killed
And how privileged I am to have the sun as the last thing I see
If God will have me I’ll happily join his angels now
I look down the crippled rock face to the water, miles below
What have I got to lose?
I’m going to learn to fly…