I’d like a pizza topped with cheese
then sprinkled with some gnats and fleas,
some centipedes and slimy slugs,
and other creepy, crawly bugs.

I want to add some fingernails
and oyster ooze and crunchy snails
and chicken bones and spoiled meat
and smelly socks from dirty feet.

I want it topped with lots of mold
and gooey boogers (not too old),
a lot of snot, a little spit,
and guts with grimy, grainy grit.

I want the most disgusting crust
with spider webs and day-old dust
and dirt and mud and blood and gore
delivered to my sister’s door.

I sat there in meditation
and fell deeply into myself.
I found myself in a strange nation
surrounded by walls of shelves.

My eyes caught sight of the book
I knew I wanted to peruse.
Grabbed it from its little nook
and saw its utter condition of misuse.

It was dusty and caked with mold
this little book with a cover quite plain.
I could see the traces of a trimming of gold
and lettering in calligraphy considered arcane.

Dusted away the filth, the webs, the debris
only to find a surprise that grabbed my heart.
There in beautiful lettering of a dark Chablis
was my name readying myself to depart.

The book fell from my callused hands
and the world around began its descent.
I know neither where or when I stand
as I begin my astral ascent.

Opened my eyes and clutched my chest
as I looked around my dimmed room.
Silence- broken by the laughter of this jest
that my consciousness decided to bloom.

you wouldnt know, unlesss you looked inside my head
past the cobwebs and the shattered  glass
you dont know what goes on inside my pretty little head

its a mess of broken thoughts
and shattered  dreams
its   my mind as you see it
but you cant because you arent me,
so let me tell you
what does the thought process look like?

arrows to the  right
arrows to the left
arrows to heaven
and
arrows to hell

arrows pointing at relationships
arrows pointing at failures
arrows pointing at responsibilities
arrows pointing at  challenges

  all these arrows
all thse  lines
all these scars within my mind
It  never stops it never ends
it  keeps  repeating
again and again

arrows  pointing up
arrows pointing down
arrows  in
and arrows out
  all these spiders  in my mind
they whisper and the cackle
they mock me and  ridicule me

I tell these spiders to stop moving
they never listen they just keep spinning
threatening my sanity
the big one  screams
the  small one  shrieks
then never stop  screaming
they never stop sceming

my mind it bleeds
my thoughts are scarred
I try to  heal them
the cuts to deep

all these arrows
all these spiders
till  writing away my own salvation
Its the only way to let it out
my pen bleeds
the spiders shreik
the arrows point
  the vioces mock
there is no end in  sight for me


JUST
SHUT
UP

  and thats what goes on inside my mind
a poem of  insecurity failure
and broken  webs
with spiders
and  arrows
and voices that mock

no end in sight
  and lets  repeat
do not ever let  me bleed
I must  survive
I  do this for you
as well as me

its incomplete
but thats okay
this poem is my mind
so let it bleed!!!

AWAKENING

Sleep and slumber, dreams of wonder... weaving,
morning’s vacuum broke the spell
Pitted pillow, note of parting... leaving,
“from your friend, a fond farewell”
Sunrise throbbing, twilight aching... grieving,
daydreams, flashbacks, nightmares knell
Pale phantasms, visions sneaking... thieving,
plot to fill the empty shell

12 DELIRIA

1st Delirium: COLLAPSES

Fractured sky bolts, billows bursting... rumbling,
heavens tighten, turn the vise
Horsemen saddle shafts of lightning... tumbling,
jagged highways must suffice
Ruptured skyways, hailstones crackling... crumbling,
naked pearls of paradise
Toxic tongues of laughter stinging... stumbling,
ocean buckets choked with ice
Droplets drumming, thunder muzzled... mumbling,
washed out whispers pay the price
Smothered blazes, cinders smoking... humbling,
ashes shaped in sacrifice

2nd Delirium: DECENTS

Asphalt alleys, ashen faces... frowning,
blowing bubbles, chewing gum
Drinking ale from tavern tankards... downing,
moonlit beads of painted rum
Stony stars and sea misshapen... drowning,
humble rivers’ rhythms hum
Apparitions aspirating... clowning,
diamonds dying , minstrels strum
Incandescent candles conquered... crowning,
vacant vapours, cold and numb

3rd Delirium: FATES

Tempest turmoil, tapered turrets... holding,
dungeons, dragons, chains and racks
Wheels of fortune, Tarot temptress... molding,
Hangmen, Towers, One Eyed Jacks
Sand dune castles, cryptic candles... folding,
warping walls of liquid wax
Idols colder, combed and coddled... scolding,
hide in fissures, peek through cracks

4th Delirium: LOST SOULS

Sunken cities, pilgrims peering... gawking,
squinting eyeballs, blazing sun
Janus facing, shepherds chasing... stalking,
friends embrace before they shun
Tearooms steaming, tumult teeming... talking,
lovers listen, poets pun
Broken stones unanchored, quaking... rocking,
slipping, falling, one by one
Beaten pathways, footsteps marking... mocking,
wedged in webs which spiders spun
Circus shelters, big tops tumbling... locking,
people pacing, soon they’re none
Numbered exits, zeros numbing... knocking,
midnight daylight’s days undone
Moon blood shackles, shivers shaming... shocking,
starlight striders streaking, stun
Hushed but harried hermits waiting... walking,
restless rainbows on the run
Pixies, elves, and echoes bouncing... balking,
fading fast when dawn’s begun
Bantum butterflies are flitting... flocking
sometimes conquered, overrun
Hocus pokus, seers focus... squawking,
voodoo wavered, witchcraft won

5th Delirium: INTROSPECTION

Sundown furnace, fires fading... coughing,
dusky dew drops drain the air
Empty chalice, sipped in silence... quaffing,
thirsting shadows unaware
Looking glass and lattice scorning... scoffing,
local loser gapes and stares
Faces covered, dancing naked... doffing,
peering inside, hope despairs

6th Delirium: THE VOID

Tales of taboos, mystic mythos... missing,
windows shuttered, bolted door
Kindled candles, tongues and anvils... hissing,
heavy hammers, echoes roar
Dark deceivers, raven charmers... kissing,
draging demons from the shore
Hopeless hollows filled with doubters... dissing
standing empty - nevermore

7th Delirium: SEARCHING

Martyred monks haunt runic ruins ... waiting,
banging broken bells below
Vaulted hallways, voided voices... grating,
churning Chinese chimes aglow
Granite graveyards, spectres spooking... skating,
blackened bushes, roses grow
Midget dwarfs seek mutant migrants... mating,
packing parcels, ice and snow

8th Delirium: NIGHTTIME

Throbbing drumheads, fingers blazing... steaming,
coins of copper, beggars plea
Rusty residues of resin... streaming,
opal amber filigree
Orphan shades in shallow shadows... teeming,
steeping twigs in twilight tea
Cloister doorsteps, Prophets gaming... scheming,
tracing tracks of destiny
Blacksmiths blanching, horseshoes glowing... gleaming,
partially sheathed in black debris
Phantoms feigning, nightmares scathing... screaming,
dusty dreamers drifting free

9th Delerium: EMPTYNESS

Water wheels in wastelands... turning,
drowning relics in the slum
Rumpled rags of fashioned burlap... burning,
lit by bandits blind and dumb
Pastured prisons, ponies bridled ... yearning,
forest fairies under thumb
Sounds inside of cauldrons coughing... churning,
blaring bugles, tattooed drum

10th Delirium: ALIENATION

Rain unravelling, wistfully weeping... falling,
treacle trickling, fickle sky
Mushrooms sprinkled, visions sprouting... sprawling,
seagulls drowning, dolphins die
Rabble gasping, spirits broken... crawling,
lonely lonesome swallows cry
Babbling brooks and breakers ebbing... bawling
puppies paddle, puppets sigh
People passing ripple past me... calling,
rainbow colours, collars high
Chaos seething, lepers looting... stalling,
stealing stallions on the sly
Pencils pausing, scholars scrambling... scrawling,
scratching scribbles, asking why

11th Delirium: JETSAM

Silver sails sway pallid pirates... prowling,
Jolly Rogers, wind and sound
Parrots perching, tattered feathers... fouling,
tethered talons, tied and bound
Shipwrecked foghorns, trumpets stranded... howling,
spiral springs of time unwound
Magic moonlight, shimmers shaking... scowling,
burnt out matchsticks washed aground
Prairie wolfs, coyotes calling... yowling,
witching hours, midnight hounds
Tightrope walkers, grizzlies grunting... growling,
seeking islands, lost and found

12th Delirium: RELIEF

Slumber shattered, vapours captive... haunting,
chained in mirrors, breaking free
Scarlet skylines, daylight dawning... daunting,
rivers rushing to the sea
Silence softens, sandmen whisper... wanting,
piercing rafters, turning keys
Shadows shudder, notions fluster... flaunting,
moonbeam bullets meant for me
Mind in migraine, meadows trembling... taunting,
sparrows speak in harmony

REAWAKENING

Pitter patter, teardrops paling... pearling,
salting scarves in secret drawers
Mist amongst us, smoke rings rising... curling,
climbing from the ocean floors
See-saw circles, senses swerving... swirling,
swept away with silver oars
Courtyard jesters, sceptres twisting... twirling,
push the past to foreign shores
Passing pangs of passions heaving... hurling,
burning bridges, closing doors
Roses wither, icons waning... whirling,
time decays and time restores

The black deer graces headlights again,
Unusually an often occurrence.
Beams burn the animal,
But it feels love.
Absolutely, entirely backwards.
The deer is broken,
Like the light reflecting off your cheeks.
Head pain, a headache,
Left little for the mind to chew
And I've been suffering for weeks now.
I drew inspiration from dust off strangers feet.
I've never been so dull, so bland, so colourless.
Mental instability, she's pretty but she's dead
And he's looking for cheap porn.
Welcome to psychedelia and the twisted webs of today's society.
Paint your own empty shadow,
No one else wants it until you join pop
And pop ain't my thing.

I knew it would happen again
Every time you drink
This is how we end up

Intertwined in webs of false regret
And untrue apologies

It is never an accident
And neither of us are ever really sorry

Pin holes in the sky, below the webs of light
a tree reaching high, against a the pink and blue
catchy tunes, the smell of roast and leaves
night between buildings, setting sun in the rafters
panoramic view of the ocean, reflections of the flowers
puddles on the road, spirits of last winters snow
create contrast in my heart, let the wind blow

My whole being quivers...

You are an engaging ember
Through all those beautiful thoughts


I've Caught the match that you have thrown,
you sought to fan those flames
as it turns out...

              I am coal ,the brilliance of diamonds snuffed out
By your tiny spark

spread out like my fingers,
tiny webs formed,
across the canyon of corner to corner.
over millions of feet off the ground,
so it seemed.
such a small creature,
you mean no harm to anyone,
but the flies and the pests that creep in during the night.
you've done nothing wrong,
but trip across our floorboards,
and descend upon our tables.
but for some reason we feel,
that you have no reason to live,
and that no one would miss you when you leave.