When next you see me travel
Do not ask if I will stay
I've not the time for talking
You'll not get the time of day
My time, my dear, is money
With such value, I'd nary trust her
My words, you'll heed, are golden
Your two cents, mere bronze, lack luster
Fit the bill, you do not
Of cases I will juggle
A blind man could see with both his eyes
How pettiness is your struggle
Complaints of yours, I'll not hear one
For requests, I lack forbearance
Ask a favor, do not you try
Charity's beyond my inherence
Those paws you clinch, you'll also wash
Dare you raise a fist to me
Your filth exudes, nay, it disgusts
Mealworms could out-shine thee
So step off, peasant, you've done enough
Of this wasting of my breath
Be gone now, be clear of sight
Lest thou wish for their own death
"Your majesty" I shall be addressed
No more else should such scum say
And when next you see me travel
Do not ask if I will stay
What do they see when they look at me?
This question rattles around inside my head,
As I stare at my reflection on silvered glass,
A perfectly reversed copy that I can only dread.
Is it the reversal that keeps me from seeing what they see?
The smile that angles too much, now angled the wrong way.
Does that small change hide the howls that scream when I look away?
Do the lenses in front of my tired eyes hide the tears that have fallen?
Do my crossed arms hide the heartache that has become too solemn?
What do they see when they look at me?
It can't be what I see, for they would not stay.
My eyes roam my body, picking out flaws with the ease of a plastic surgeon,
While my mind does the same to my psyche, more intense than a psychologist.
Self-hate session done for today, it only took an hour this time.
What do they see when they look at me?
Eyes closed, I try to build an image in my mind of what they've told me they see.
It looks so similar, same clothes, same hair, but it's not quite me.
Not-Me smiles, but it's not my broken smile.
This charms with sardonic sincerity, promises a wicked sense of humor and a clever wit.
Not-Me stretches, but it doesn't highlight his sharpness.
This highlights the hollow of his collarbone, light catching the curves and angles to perfection.
Not-Me laughs, but it's not loud and obnoxious.
This bursts out in sheer delight, eyes crinkling in joy, ringing with mirth.
Not-Me walks forward, but it's not my gangly lurch.
This flows with determination, long strides that speak of a hidden strength.
He is not broken by his past, he is stronger for it.
He is not haunted by old memories, he is wiser for them.
He is not burdened from loss, he is compassionate from it.
Is this what they see when they look at me?
Is this why they don't shy away?
The reflecting glass pierces my darkness,
My breath shuddering as Not-Me is cast back at me,
Strong and whole in his glass frame,
I reach out to him, wishing only to embrace him into me.
I am Me, and I am Not-Me.
I am broken, which makes me strong.
I am haunted, which makes me wise.
I am burdened, which makes me compassionate.
What do I see when I look at me?
Is it Me?
I've been around a beautiful girl
for a few weeks now
she has dark hair
and deep eyes
I could see her heart through her shirt
and I could tell that she noticed mine
she was just a human being
a kindred spirit experiencing the same ride
and we took the absence of time as a sign
that something was special about this
then our parallel lines began to intertwine
we lay on my bed
I'm on one end
as she drapes over the other
we're still babbling
as we see the light come from the blinds
and realize it's breakfast time
we need sleep but our bodies
and our minds are connecting
the room is filled with unspoken feelings
I noticed the shadow of her face
on the ceiling above
flashing from the flicker of the candle flame
I look to her and say "we can hold the sex, I'll take the love"
then the birds began to sing from the trees
and we lay touching as we fall asleep from the heat of the sun
I remember her looking me in the eye
and saying "together, in a closed room, we made thunder,
you hopeless romantics make great lovers
but you're doomed to walk alone
as artists and poets
down an adventurous path
but you have no clue as to where you're going
I know you're smart enough to have seen this coming
but I must go, I'm sorry"
I've heard that before
and I'm beginning to believe it
Because of that moment, you were led here,
If that had not happened, this wouldn't be
Everything happens, making other things clear
Just never woulda guessed that you'd be so important to me
Simple little actions, fingertip movements, linked us into conversation
An open bridge was built that night for our souls to travel across freely
Emotionally jumped into each others' soulful arms, without hesitation
Each message read was like a piece of our heart that we were inadvertently stealing
Every time your face popped up on my screen,
My heart would nearly skip a beat
Right now, many miles lay inbetween
But in roughly two weeks our bodies will finally meet.
Already in you I've let myself be vulnerable, comfortably
The pictures we paint with words depict something I can really see
I feel each slightest touch as if you were here enveloped in me, effortlessly
We've already raised each others' spirits and expanded frequencies
I think about you being here, or me there, frequently.
Thinking of hugging you instills a kind of peace in me,
Call it tranquility...simple pleasantries..call it anything..
~So long as it involves love~
You say I've done so much for you
But words are never enough.
Just symbols, to represent, stuff
Independent to the perspective
I just hope I symbolized meaning that was effective
How much I care.. I really meant it
Because if I didn't mean the content, I wouldn't have sent it
Hearts on the sleeves with arms extended
For any wound in your soul I wanna mend it.
Anything on your mind you can come to me and vent it.
I at least have a little bit of time left, I wanna come to you and spend it.
We're gonna have to take advantage of time spent, so to not regret it
Already deep within me you are embedded,
Talked so much in a short period, just know everything was true when I said it
Just as it is in the current, riding waves of light that'll promise us at least one night.
Frigid, snowy weather,
yet warm together~
It's our endeavor to better ourselves,
And I'll always be there for you when you need help.
I tend to move in stealth, but I make myself known.
My daydreams, embraced by you feels so at home.
If you're ever down, feeling alone
I'm here, pick up the phone, no matter the time zone
I'll send my electrified vibes flying through the air faster than a drone
some say it's tossed around too much,
But I say too little
They put rules and complications on it,
trying to find an answer to the riddle
I told you I could say it to strangers
But it's hard, romantically speaking,
as if there's impending danger.
But if the feeling's true we shouldn't waiver
For there's no guaranteeing there'll be a later
Even though right now I'm feeling blue,
I have nothing but love for you,
You make me think of brighter colors
Meshing energies like long lost lovers
An endless darkness lies herein
this inner light corrupted by sin
I yearn solely for a chance to live
and unleash the madness that dances within
release it to the universe where it's taken by the wind
and quietly transformed into an ageless melody
A song that tells of elusive time and eternal sorrow
reveals that today is and always will be tomorrow
For utter madness holds vast wisdom;
This unhinged mind conceals a timeless soul;
With the secrets of the universe mutated by the human condition
into Science, Philosophy, and flawed Religion
incapable in its perception to grasp the divine
for in the end , most of us are truly blind
As I lie prisoner to the corridors of my mind
surrounded by memories and colossal dreams
I see a glimpse of a universe destroyed
whose light is invisible to those truly devoid
And human reality becomes a gaping black hole
that imprisoned my mind and tainted my soul
She was not a cliché kind of beautiful,
but she was not a ‘rare’ kind of beautiful.
She was humanly beautiful, in the most natural way.
She was earthly though she didn’t mean to be, it came easily to her without effort.
She was intelligently beautiful, with wit and charm that came smoothly.
It didn’t make her intimidating though, no no, never.
She was kindly beautiful, in the way that
someone could slap her and she would retaliate with only gentleness,
but that did not make her vulnerable, it made her mature.
But most of all, as many may of seen it, she was physically beautiful.
Not in the sense of a perfect body and flawless features, no, she was beautiful to look at
because her face radiated all her other beauties.
You could see her charm in the way her eyes dazzled, and you could sense her wit in the way
she smirked before she said something.
Her always blushed cheeks eternally made people around her feel comfortable, even if
they disliked her..
for she was understanding and soft, like a young girl.
And lastly, she was beautiful appearance wise.
Though she was not perfect, for the boy didn’t have a definition for that yet,
he found her peaking towards it.
Her smile was not one of a model or an angel.
In fact, in his eyes, her worst feature was her smile, as horrid as it sounded.
To the boy, she had never smiled.
Everytime she laughed or ‘smiled’ as someone greeted her, she looked pained..
like she wanted to cry.
Her smiles were never real, though he knew she wanted them to be genuine.
That was the thing, she was genuine, but her smiles were not.
He knew, as much as she denied it, that her smiles were always forced and never true.
He knew this in the only way one knows when they’re in love.
He’d watched for countless nights as she reached her fantasies, sitting by herself,
books scattered around her as she read her favourite fairytales for the hundreth time.
He watched as she giggled over the same jokes and cried over the same deaths,
but he focused on her especially when she reached her favourite part of the story.
Her eyes would brighten and her shoulders would rise slightly,
and she’d do this silly little thing where she would put her tongue in between her teeth,
that drove him mad, but he grew to love it.
And at last he had seen her smile, as her soft dimples appeared at the corners of her mouth,
and her eyes crinkled ever so slightly, nose scrunching up the tiniest bit.
But just as he found himself getting lost in her beautiful smile, she would look up from her book and leave her world for a while, smile dropping and shoulders hunching as she told him
to get some rest, for every following day to her would be a long one.
And that was how he knew, the girl would never be in love like he was, she would never,
as understanding as she was, grasp that someone could possibly love as madly as he did.
She would never allow him to peek into her fantasies, let alone give him her heart.
But the boy was afraid she already had his in tight grip, and he would never have hers.
isn't it beautiful
how every day,
a new life
is brought into this world?
so many wonderful
chances and oppurtunities to come
so many memories
they're yet to make.
isn't it tragic,
that the new life
only a couple minutes old
has no idea what they'll face
in the real world?
all the heartbreaks
all the tears
all the suffering,
which they're yet
and I suppose the question is
if I had the chance
to go back in time
and decide on my
would I choose to live?
I'm quite afraid,
that the answer is,
I was riding high until some thoughts passed by.
Saw a few pictures and memories flooded the very limited space in my head
Levees feel like they're about to break through tear ducts, yet still afraid to cry.
But now, at this point there's been many I shed
Very sensitive connections kept us together.
You couldn't speak English, but still spoke through your action
Came by my side during storms that I could not weather.
I wish I knew how fast your time was passing
Sometimes I took your companionship for granted
Often not investing thought in the moment.
Stood by me, even when life.. I couldn't stand it
Now I'm thinking about your fate and how I wished I could've controlled it
Anytime I was home, you made me conscious of your calls
Whenever I was in my own bed you made sure to join me
It's as if now, without you, I'm getting withdrawls.
A bond beyond brotherhood draped in comfortability
The week I house sat for my mom, will remain with me always
Laying on the floor depressed, not only because you were dying
Still get choked up, knowing we showed each other love, before your next phase
But to keep you alive, some witnissed to see how hard I was trying
Weeks later after I moved, I woke up in Nevada thinking "where'd Austin go?"
I swear I felt you, and thought you were there, even though it may've not made sense
Know you're still in my heart, and were always so blissfully pleasant to hold.
I still feel you, and will always make room for your presence
You were the one cat I knew that would actually just into my arms from the floor, on command.
You held on, never scared as if you didn't wanna let go
Literally wrapped your paws around my neck in a hug-like embrace, or should i say - little hands.
Spent more time together than most of the humans I know
I miss you buddy, and the feelings haven't changed.
Some may think caring this much about an animal is strange.
Truth is we're all animals, and I'll see you at the next stage <3
One of these days
I’ll keep aside a day for mourning
I’ll journey through memory
To dig up buried faces
My priceless treasures
Passing guests of life
Touching me for minutes
A few hours
But carving in my heart
And who I outlive
With a sense of guilt
Pangs of conscience
That in those minutes
By those hours
They did miraculously more
Than I have ever thought of doing
Across far longer time
Living for what they gave me
But not living for what they taught me
In those small hours
When their eyes only gave
Their hearts only parted
The noblest thing for me
That I failed then
Did I mention it's finals week?
I'm stuck awake writing my life away, but the clock doesn't stop
Tick, tock, tick, tock
7 hours of exams tomorrow, am I ready?
Have to be up in 3 hours.
Tick, tock, tick, tick, tock
No, I'm just a little crazy from the time
Tick, tock, tick...tock...tock...