remind me why
I'm still awake
sleep elude me so?
I've searched corners
but answers still elude me so
i doubt myself
and where I stand
in whatever it is
that keeps me awake
and with street lights
guiding my way
through dawn cascading
the walk down every
heavy steps upon the street
questioning until collapse
the beer cans at my feet
He was known as the local Mycophagist
In the dales, the woods and the hills,
What happened was sad, for he wasn’t so bad
Just a tad underdone, Toby Gills,
They say that the cord was around his neck,
He was born with a carroty mop,
And a pale white head, he was almost dead
When the doctor had called out ‘Stop!’
They cut the cord and they let him breathe,
The damage was already done,
The blood had been stopped to his carroty top
So they said that he’d always be dumb.
But he found a niche where the fungi creeps
And went out collecting the spore,
In a year or two he knew more than you
And the college Professor next door.
He studied his mushrooms with loving intent,
He knew about hen of the woods,
He knew about bracket and shaggy manes, magic
And paddy straw, they were the goods;
He fostered his lobster and hedgehog and oyster
And coral fungi and stinkhorns,
But didn’t discern between fly agarics
And toadstools that grew in the lawn.
He grew his spore in a deep, dark cellar
And sold to the folk who came by,
And never would judge between Widow Weller
And the ordinary witches of Rye,
He’d sell death caps, and pigskin puffballs
Not thinking to question them why,
Or who would be eating his laughing Jim’s
And whether they knew they would die.
The air was thick and the air was damp
And he fell in the dark one day,
Scattering toadstools into the air
And their spores had floated away,
He breathed the spores right into his lungs
For he hadn’t been wearing a mask,
But sucked them in right over his tongue
And they came to his lungs, at last.
I happened to see him out in the street
He was finding it hard to breathe,
He could only take a couple of steps
Then sit on the kerb, to heave,
I tried to help but he waved me away
And his eyes were yellow and cruel,
Then I saw what he’d thrown up on the kerb
Some yellow and red toadstools.
The man was a walking toadstool spore
They were popping up out of his hair,
Pushing their way though his carroty top
In a bid to get to the air,
And his skin was blotched like a puffball, he
Looked up at me, and he cried,
As a giant toadstool grew from his throat
And he lay on his side, and died.
David Lewis Paget
I wage a losing battle.
if the stray pup survives
one more dog on the street
one more hungry mouth
if I let it die
one more death for my conscience
one more compromise to
only the fittest survive
I make my choice.
In the name of Darwin
I can't let the pup die
under cold night sky.
Halt our shallow breaths--
staccato fogs at the stoplights
Cling precarious in cold
like the frost on the stop signs.
The street lights keep on winking
Winter's early and it's sinking
and clutching wool to swollen throats
I swore I'd never stand here again
at December's fucking doorstep
knocking every weekend
(I) always circle back every year
I take the same old punches
and shiver through same regrets
Halt my raising glass
and analyze my afflictions:
28, alone and broke
Fucking cop to addictions.
These late years keep on stalking
Old friends have started balking
at my shit
that shoe fits
vices acquit, but they'll convict.
I know that I will stand here again
at December's fucking deathbed
sleeping in every weekend
(I) always spring right back every March
I await the same old punches
and defrost my losing bets.
You know this never should have happened.
I was never suppose to write a single poem.
Let alone have followers, comments and views.
But here we are and I have you to thank.
And this is my thank you to you all.
My first round of 'thank you's' goes to my followers.
Devlin Andrew Harris, who is quite remarkable, followed me before I had even written anything.
Charlotte Weigh, my most favorite person in the whole world
Nicholas Jones, you were inspiration behind 100 of my poems; yes I counted.
Alysia Michelle; if you ever find yourself in Oregon we'll get some donuts ;P
Harry J Baxter
Nolan Fillman, you have no idea how much your following me, liking my poems, and comment meant to me.
THE WHITE RABIT
Floyd Allen Michael Redenbaugh
Nat Lipstadt, who is beyond brilliant and honored me with being a subject of his writing
Jonny Angel, thank you
Miss Jade Murder
Emily Rose Williams
Timothy, the nicest commenter ever
Peyton, she's pretty fantastic
Tyler Lynn Pulliam
Fadi Shaker, thank you
Kevin Song, sorry I'm not much of a talker
Soul in Torment, beyond words of the skill this one has.
Kelly Rose, thank you
Bailee K, missing you girl
Bilal Kaci, thank you too
Blue K, greatness she has
Tristan Costello, hello
Sadie K, the one with her hands covering her face
Queen of Pancakes, yes you
Whit Trash and Retarded
Ryan Cullen Macleod
The Masked Sleepyz
Okoye Chude Maryanne
and Haley Madison
Next my thanks wants to go to those who took the time to like and comment.
Ernest Gone, one of the first
Joshua X Noheart
Joshua Wann, this guy is the stuff
Andrew Joseph O'Donnell
A Mess of Words, you have no idea how highly I hold you. If this is a 'mess' I hope it never get's cleaned up
Austin Skye, thank you
Heather E Perry
4 different ---, why are you hiding from me?!
I wish I could cry
Kitty named Bailey
Whinging Wonder, I'm sorry
Chandin Clinton, I was never more honored.
Enter Name Here
Sally A Bayan
Yong Hwan Son
Rose Saba, thank you
The Wolf on Red Street
Josh Nunn, hats :)
N, hey you
Michael J Davies
Alexandria Christine Lund
Andrew Siegel, thank you
and Jade Ellen Peel.
And of course to all of you who read my words.
That means a lot to me.
And sure I could have simply said
"I hit 20,000 views thank you all!"
But honestly it means SO much that I needed
to thank each one of you individually.
I am know the pain and frustration of having a name misspelt so let me know and I'll fix it :)
It was strange almost as strange as Thanksgiving with Justin Bieber at his grandmother's house.
Yes I'm sure that wasn't the only thing getting stuffed that year.
Who doesn't enjoy being serenaded by their grandson as he's naked with his pick in one hand and
his dick in the other as he stands butt ball naked in the kitchen.
Thanks Canada your like a dirty girlfriend who instead of giving a great blowjob gave us herpes What do I expect from a country that also gave us maple syrup and call me maybe.
I know we just met and this sounds crazy but your countries music sucks so never call us okay.
I was alone in the Pub as usual hell what do you expect from a site that has a showcase yet has no more groups from which half of the showcases are named after .
Yeah the owner has that true modern day logic like having a music channel that only shows
reality show whores and knocked up bitches who complain about paying the bills yet are employed by the network yeah common sense it really is lost on stupid people.
I was having like half of a case when a hamster who shall remain unnamed due to she would
harm me if I spoke the name of which is not to be spoken of walked through the door.
Gonz set me up with a cold one I really need it.
Really hamster I never pegged you as a necrophilia kind of gal but to each his own
good thing I got the paper let me just check the obituaries and make some calls
You want something fresh off the highway or you more into cold cuts?
I know I'm going to hell but honestly did you expect good taste in reading this shit ?
Are you fucking nuts?
The agitated little hamster asked as she looked at me with anger and possible rape in her eye's.
Look I can always hope good thing I forgot my whistle.
Just give me a cold beer you pervert and that joke was tasteless really have you no respect for anything?
I looked at the hamster after handing her the beer and thought deeply and hard pulling my mental hair at the same time even though I don't have any don't ask.
It's my job to make tasteless jokes and be a pervert what you think the time clock on the walls for?
Um employees ?
Well yeah it used to be until they whole health care shit I swear I give my workers one meal a week and provide a perfectly good basement for them now I got to give them health care duh
if I paid my bills what would I drink with ?
My customer who remains anonymous to protect the safety of my balls.
Looked at me in disgust uh oh looks like I might be getting a spanking as well.
You really keep those poor people locked in the basement ?
Duh person I cant say your name there not real people there here illegally.
How can you say that I should call the cops on you .
The hamster was turning red and from the threat of calling in the fuzz I knew she must be
serious yet still I knew deep down she was just playing hard to get with her threats and restraining orders but enough with the foreplay hamsters.
Look I really don't see what the big deal is ?
You have people trapped in your basement like some dirt bag smuggler.
Now you hold on a minute hamster how dare you insult me I said in my grown up voice
I know I can act like a grown up shocking isn't it?
I was about to tell this hamster just what I really thought of people who take advantage of people
who just want a better life and exploit others and really preach some of that moral shit that sounds real good yet isn't what I think cause I'm truly a ruthless bastard.
When I stopped and saw the clock oh shit hold that thought I almost forgot to feed the basement people.
I reached under the bar and grabbed four cartons of cigarettes and a case of wine.
What in the hell you only give those poor people booze and cigarettes ?
Well duh there French what else would they want?
Just then a voice came up from the dungeon I mean basement of the pub gonzo more wine
you American swine I hate you yet still I applaud your efforts in destroying that vile
man child Selena Gomez .
Ahh you got love the French sure that strange little man may stay drunk on a girl drink and smoke like a chimney but even he hates shit pop music as much as me.
My one and only reader slash customer slash person I enjoy annoying sat in shock.
You are so fucked up .
I looked as I took my seat behind the bar that no longer exists because some people
who shouldn't be allowed out of there cage run the site into the like button ground.
Yes hamster I'm a little ruff around the edges but when you get to know me.
You realize behind all the insults and perverted bad humor .
I'm well I'm far worse than you could ever imagine.
We sat there swapping stories the drinks flowed the French man in the basement yelled
something in that strange language he spoke once I couldn't understand cause I
don't speak German.
It was a true night to remember except for the part I forgot duh!
It was growing closer and closer to closing time I mixed us both a good strong drink
yet with a soft side and heart of gold like a awesome hooker or that man tranny Kim Kardashian .
Well I guess better head out Gonz.
Aren't you feeling like your going to pass out .
Um no why ?
Dammit its really getting bad when you cant trust a good street dealer to quality
The hamster was headed out the door but before she left she turned and said.
Oh yeah and you might need to grab a pillow.
And then everything went black but not like in the NBA .
No indeed I was out like Charlie sheen after a really good coke binge when he used to be cool.
I awoke upon the floor alone cold and hurting in a area far more strange than fifty one
dammit man whya alien would travel across the galaxy only to corn hole rednecks and poetic madmen is beyond me but enough about what some owners of websites do in there off time.
Upon the bar sat the only cure for my troubles a double shot of good blended whiskey.
Next to it a note on a bar napkin .
Dear Gonz next time remember to remember which drink you spiked you dumbass .
I had to laugh and sit really funny the seat was a bit uncomfortable get your heads out of the gutter
children your almost as bad as me.
Until next time kids remember .
Good humor bad humor its just fucking a joke to begin with so lighten the fuck up.
Cheers and stay crazy.
And remember if it offends nobody forced you to read it to begin with.
Drinks on me cheers.
There was a knock at the door
A knock that bounces off in rhythm
Similar yet different
from the disjointed sounds
of her head hitting the door,
the bathroom sink,
and then the floor
Her beats were her beatings
which often dragged from street to bed
They began with her mothers boyfriend,
an alcoholic enforcer of peace, law, and trust
But, he wished to take a piece of her and eat it,
telling her that no laws were broken,
as he asked her to trust him
With a bit of apprehension
she sequestered, she went to his level,
as mother looked on from her blind eye
She asked her mother to stop the man
because it was a new pain unlike any other
Mother cooked on, stirring her beef stew,
just cooking along as she bawled
Those tears provided little relief
to the daughter with her first STD at 13
She provided little reaction
after multiple interactions with her attacker
It was easier to spread her legs and allow easy access to the temple residing there in shambles
She became intoxicated by the same poison that
awakened the inner beast within her mothers man
An exciting blood rush from bruised legs healed
by liquors lecherous lectures
Until one day the man died
in the street due to his debts
A man in blue left black and blue,
thus freeing her, or so she thought
Now at seventeen she had never had a man of her
own, or a boy after booty in her case
She doesn't know what a good boy looks like, or
feels like, only what a bad man taste like
Consequently she repeats the cycle
because it is comfort as she's conformed
Her contorted body and twisted smile with
tattooed black and blues is normal
Another knock at the door
A sound that bounces off in rhythm
Rhythm and blues
Rhythm and blues
Similar but different
from the dangling
of her bracelets
as her man chokes her
with her necklace
she gasps for breath,
but is helpless
Completely given into
the physically stronger
person above her
Keeping her down:
till she begs to be 6 feet underground
Where he stops just short
And digs her up from the Earth
He puts out cigarettes
on her tongue
He rapes her repeatedly:
cooing for her to call him daddy
He makes her shoot up heroine
He beats her and her temple
She is a shell of who she used to be,
but accepts what fate has afforded her
As if she had no say in the matter
because no one told her
that there is always a choice
She doesn't know that she can run
She doesn't know that she can fight back
She doesn't know that she can call the police
She doesn't know her own power
Because she is nothing,
nothing without him,
and him and him and him,
Nothing all at without dripping
blood on the floor from her bottom lip
busted open after denying his kiss
She has his baby in her stomach
but it doesn't stop him
from kicking her ass up and down the block
He doesn't want her to have the baby
so he throws her down stairs daily,
"are you fucking crazy?"
Her neighbors yell
as her man tells them
to mind their business
and go to hell
"She's my bitch," he yells
as he always excels
at repelling everyone else
One day an unknown savior
came to offer her aid
One thing led to another
and her saviors fist met her mans face
She screamed and the savior
thought it was out of relief
However she was afraid
that her man was deceased
Her savior would end up
leaving the building in hand cuffs
As she embraced her man,
he swore he woke up and would change
She smiled brightly as he kissed her scars
and dried tears from her face
Her beatings ended for two nights:
then started up again when
she forgot to defrost some chicken
Once more a knock at her door
A bang that bounces off in rhythm
A baby boy was produced and given love
in the highest quantities known to man,
smothering in quality, and genuine as can be
His mother sacrificed every day of her life for his,
took every loss in stride, cooked every night,
and was beaten in plain sight of her baby boy
Baby boy learns from daddy,
Daddy turns to stranger,
Stranger is never a danger,
Stranger daps young boy,
After assaulting his mother,
Stranger gives young boy a gun,
Stranger tells young boy to join a gang,
Stranger tells young boy to run the streets,
Stranger tells young boy to hit his woman,
Stranger says she's a hoe and a bitch,
Just like the young boys mama,
Stranger gives props to young boy,
Stranger loves young boy,
And young boy loves stranger back,
Young boy hates:
and the sun,
But stranger understands him,
Stranger raised him
Mother died in memorial hospital
from internal bleeding
She had taken one beating
a thousand times too many
Young boys grandmother looked
upon her body in regret and shame
Grief given much too late
for the child thrust into hate
The young boy turns man
And knocks on his ladies door
Rhythm reminiscent of hers...
Sperm and blood
Sperm and blood
Things come together
Things fall apart
Sperm and blood
Sperm and blood
Things come together
Things fall apart
Sperm and blood
Sperm and blood
Things come together
Things fall apart
There’s an aging house across the street
with inhabitants we’ll never meet
a bright blue truck
grass with no luck
tall weeds that look like wheat.
Their christmas lights are inside out
rust is running all throughout
with creaks and groans
brown water out the water spout.
holding your skin against mine,
exploring the silk surfaces of your mind,
diving deep into the darkness
just to hear the rain and street collide.
i'm a sinking ship,
an eroding shore,
that ebbs past the horizon,
i'm a withering tree
losing its scarlet youth,
am i a lie?
or am i the truth?
Strut the stage for awhile
Bright as Life Death is
(So very bright)
Did I know you?
I don't know
In the alleyways
Pauper children line the garbage cans
Waiting for War
I stumble on
(No street lamps)
A GREAT SENSE OF REMORSE
Didn't really strut at all