I tried to come up with all the reasons why I can't stop thinking about you
I came up with this list and if it doesn't make sense now, it will in time
I can't stop thinking about your smile because it is a time machine
Bringing me back to the days when I had all the time in the world to stare at the stars as each would gleam
When I broke toys instead of hearts and I didn't have a problem playing with fire
The flames were never tamed, I was always to blame but I had been the only one burnt by desire
I can't stop thinking about you because your voice is akin to my pen
Promising to stick with me through thick and thin, writing every wrong that there's ever been
And when you lose it, I fear I will lose it and never find another reason to stay out of this grave
I can't stop thinking about you because your words are like the light at the end of the cave
Here I was enslaved but you gave me hope for a brighter day. A sun with which to awaken
I've taken my God forsaken faith and reinforced it with your love, it will not be shaken
I can't stop thinking about you...and sometimes I don't know why
But why would I fly away when I can hold your hand and see the beauty of the night sky from your eyes
That’s the thing about suicide
The world goes on
It keeps spinning
People keep living
No one stops.
People keep being joyous
People keep being depressed
People keep laughing
People keep crying
The stars keep shining
Children keep their innocence
Teenagers keep wishing to grow up
Adults keep drinking their sorrows away
wishing to grow down
That’s the thing about people
they keep going
They keep living
They keep doing the same thing
And the thing is
And the thing is
it doesn’t make sense
If his eyes were stars she would wish upon them.
Perhaps then, he would look to her the same way.
If his breath were a poet she would hang upon it’s every expression.
Wishing for a day where her remarks would take his breath away.
She drinks in his breath, as if it would give life to her dull bones.
If he could tell her how she made his life light up like a Christmas candle.
She would blush at every line.
Her lips puckered with virgin request.
It was the most innocent of caresses. She held onto ignorance
with no wish of letting go.
Because when she’s with him, the voices don’t cry so loudly
she could write ten thousand poems about his gentle eyes.
Describing every part of it she would sweep with her damp burnt, licked lips.
Drawn into a line to stop the flow of words she wishes to whisper.
So she doesn’t open her dark bat filled mouth to his spring filled questions.
In the obscurity, she imagines his soft hand next to hers.
She sings a lullaby into his ears, and he wishes he could kiss her.
And she wishes he could too.
As of now, she’ll cry out to the voices to hush themselves.
And the dusk to enlighten her,
She cannot see the light at the end of tunnel; this façade is blocking the way.
All she knows is that she needs him closer.
If he could tell her a thousand times that the sun shone down from the heavens and through her expression.
She would glance down at the floor and hear.
He’s lying. ҉
I question the laws which are shared among our youth during these hard times; we have no great war, no question that burns the nations to their knees blaring. We simply have our poverty and power, our endless struggles and our eating disorders.
We are the nation of winners and runners; we are the hypocrites of our father’s religion. Welcome to America, so jam packed with fast foods and cigarettes that you can hardly taste the reality before it has bombed you down.
And then there’s you, and you’re sitting there, staring at the screen… laughing at the mother with the black and white face have her daughter slaughter and eat her, and I’m laughing to, trying to hide the little girl inside me screaming.
“Kiss me,” I’ve had enough broken hearts and sleepless nights to know what it means to have a hand to hold and a body to cling to when the street lights flicker and people ponder about your past.
Talk to me, open your mouth and share with me the secrets of your mother, tell me what tragic car accident brought you to this position and how far you’d run to hold her hand. Question my beliefs and my relationships. Chose kind words over replaceable concerns, fight for my attention, and question my devotion. I want to watch movies with you, discuss some kind of universe beyond my mind, and our boundaries, hold me close while the lights in the theater are dim we’ll dance behind the stage. The lights will be our stars, predict my future with your soft hands and gentle grin.
Because you’re a stranger, I can get away with wanting, because you’re new to me, I can fantasize, holding your hand in mine, resting my head on your chest, listening to your heart beat as you sleep.
Because I’m alone tonight, I can fondle a thought, fish for a chance to be on my own with you. Tell me something; open your mind to the possibilities of me and you.
Of course, all this is wasted on time, and I’ve tried to send you signals, I want to be your friend, I want to talk to you into the late hours, stand in the midnight man’s circle sweating, calling out into the darkness, sharing songs and secrets until the dawn shatters our dream.
Then the bell rings, and you move, get up and leave, go outside to smoke, and my mind goes blank, the thoughts and dreams of the tomorrows that we could have spent together have disappeared, into nonentity. The audacity of my fantasies have brought me nothing, so I move back to questioning the laws which are shared among the youth of these hard times, and I am shaken into a reality of obesity and anorexia, of Christians and Muslims fallen in line with the atheists, I don’t mind, because tomorrow, we’ll meet again and I’ll smile and you’ll nod, and I’ll dream while you giggle.
Lola could laugh at his anger.
He could smile at her tears.
they could never be together
even after all these years
the policemen they came running
the officers had dogs
but Lola she was stunning.
even after the night time flogs
when the stars were high as drops outs
and the moon was wasted on air
the two of them imperfect
were perfect laying there.
Everything is put into a sharper perspective at night,
Have you ever noticed the deafening loudness of the eery silence?
You start to comprehend a few things, but not quite,
You want to rebel, create a sort of defiance.
Just in time the others come out, they want to dance.
They ask you to join & promise to make you feel very alive.
You start to move, they watch you prance,
Their stares are a bit unsettling but, you abide.
You can hear your heart beat, or lack thereof,
You can feel your lungs constricting from the smoke.
You're getting carried away.. where's the sheriff?
Where's the ambulance? You're starting to choke!
Your thoughts swirl, your sight is nonexistent,
Your body crashes, you can't hear a sound.
"Don't worry, you'll be okay!" Oh, what an optimistic,
You wish you were okay, you wish you'd be found.
The others have left, you're alone now,
There's nothing around you, nothing but stars.
You were expecting the time of your life, a big wow,
Silly you, thought you knew, nothing good ever happens in The Dark.
Turth hurts me.
I’m tangled in your golden hair as that scene I never watched is played beneath my eye lids
Careful camera angles, make it hard to breathe,
But I’m no where to be seen, in a jelous porn stars dream.
I hide behind the smiles, pretend Im over it, but if I was allowed to, I scream and throw a fit.
Hurl things at your battered skull till it burst
Force my mouth on your wound so I know how it hurts
I’m not even at the worst
Breathe… It’s just a jealous dream.
He screams…. Like he can tell them from reality.
sometimes i think i should have been
mist so i could rest gently against
your skin, but i'm a tidal wave
and you don't want to be pulled in
the way the moon hits the water
which is a lot like how these
feelings keep hitting me, slowly
they come and slowly they go
the ocean parts us to where
we are on different continents,
but we are two hearts as one
forced apart by harsh waters
and the thoughts that we stay
up way to late thinking about
like last night with my feet
dangling off the dock above
the pond, the goosebumps on
my skin where your warmth
should be, it was then i realized
how gone you really were
laying out under the stars
where the crickets play their
symphonic sounds, i thought
i saw you so i blinked and then
pinched myself, convinced it
must have been a silly little dream
that dock by the pond is
now where we sit with our feet
dangling above the water
and when the goosebumps come
back, you are there to warm me
you came back to me
I'm swimming in a sea of emptiness,
This universe is so endless,
My soul is so conscious,
But yet I feel so useless,
My ego is a sham,
I'm not sure if I'm asleep,
I'm not sure I'm awake,
I'm not sure if I'm god,
I'm not sure if I'm human,
But I'm sure that I was made from the stars,
I feel like a painting that was poorly visualized,
But ended up extremely breath taking.
I would never be able to find the correct words
to write about you
so I guess I'll just play with them
and hope you can see what I'm doing.
Love never crossed my mind
at least never the kind I've discovered with you
yet every new day you bring something new to the table
to surprise me with something that is truly real.
Our stories will be intertwined
in the most wonderful book
we'll each write chapters and verses
and see what we've accomplished in the end.
Very rarely would I ever doubt you
even if the skies in my mind turned grey
and I lost all sense of myself
I would still see you as beautiful.
Each and every thought of you
brings a tear to my eye
and yet you still make my heart leap with joy
when I wake up to see your face.
You're like my favorite book
full of surprises, twists and turns,
and unforgettable memories
which I hope I can share with you.
Our very bodies work together in a beautiful melody
playing off each other in perfect sequence and harmony
I could explore you for days, months, years
a very lifetime of knowing you so fully.
Underneath the stars,
your eyes still shine the brightest
I wonder what sort of things make them seem to dance like that
I'd sure love to take a lifetime to find out.
Not really sure where this came from. Hint: read the first letter of each stanza down from first to last, it spells something. Cheesy? Maybe. I'm tired. Goodnight.