Set me on fire,
Don't let me fade
Put me into the battle
Let me create a world for no mind,
Just souls
That react purely with fight or flight.
There will be no windows in the walls.
Just cement cells.
Where people cry and wale
Walking in circles, squares, zigzagging
For 1000 miles
In a 10 by 10 box,
A battle that will lead to nothing
Put me in
Set me on fire
Mia and Jonah - rooms
I think the hardest thing to remember is that everything ends.
When times are great and I'm lying in your arms its so easy to remember
That you're going to leave.
I count down the minutes until you'll have to get out of my bed, pull on your shorts, pack up your bag,
And go.
Its easy to look at it in terms of time
And know exactly how many seconds I have
Until you leave.
But when the insides of my stomach are clenching and aching,
When there's nothing in the world that can make this pain stop,
It's hard to remember that this too will end.
This time there aren't a set number of minutes to count down,
But it will pass.
My friends tell me, "He wasn't good enough for you"
My roommate says, "There's only so many times he can make you cry before I write him off."
My mom says "You've been down lately honey. Is everything okay?"
I start to perk up and think, You're right. I'm glad he's leaving.
Only a few more minutes.
I follow up with telling them that my psychic says I haven't met the love of my life yet.
I don't yet know the man I'll marry,
Which makes me feel better.
And then she says, "Have you seen her recently? How do you know?"
And I'm back to tallying the minutes left in my misery.
Its hard to remember that this pain will subside
That it will stop hurting so badly.
That I will stop thinking about you every moment of every day.
But then take me back to the flip side where things were perfect.
When we spent our first night together-
The build up,
The flirting,
The giggling-
To when we were finally in your bed, locked in each others arms
And you said to me, "This isn't going to be a one time thing."
Even then, I knew our time was limited.
I know eventually I will leave your bed permanently in the morning
To go back to my place.
And I know eventually my life will continue on without you in it.
Without our fingertips locked around each others.
But its hard to remember that
Its hard to want that.
And now you're leaving
And I so badly want to say the things
That you're not supposed to say to the guy you're fucking.
Will you ever talk to me again?
Can I still text you 24 hours a day?
Can I have your address?
Can I call you?
Do you want to call me?
Can we talk about doing more?
Can we talk about visiting?
I don't want to get a drink or coffee when I happen to be in town.
I want to visit for you.
But I'm afraid those are going to end things even quicker.
I know its going to end. That's not the question.
I just want to hold out for as long as possible
With my fingers caught in your hair,
With your arm grasping my waist,
With our texts stretching late into the nights when we can't be together.
Maybe someday we'll meet in some city
And get that drink or coffee I want more than
And rekindle this flame (5 years?).
Maybe I'll text you one too many times
And you'll stop responding (6 months?).
Or maybe we'll meet other people
And forget about our short moment of bliss (1 year?).
Until then I will continue to tally how many minutes have passed
And I have left to suffer
Until something, someone, fills this aching hole
Until there is a happier ending.
There Is But One Law
(The Dancer's Coda)
There is but one set of laws,
One that need be obeyed,
One that brooks no heresy,
One that gives no absolution.
One that needs no priests, no canons,
One that that refuses disobedience.
We all bend knee at altar invisible,
Though feasance never requested.
The Laws of Physics.
A body at rest, a body in motion.
Laws immutable, unconditional,
Equations, proofs, demonstrable,
Inequalities inexcusable, banished.
Dancer says:
I am heretic, even these laws I refuse.
My body denies limitations,
My mind believes I will make do
What it could not, but yesterday.
Defiance from wire to wire is the
Fuel in my veins, fear but a detail,
Leaping from from ten meters more,
My Declaration of Independence.
My body plastic, my mind ethereal,
Some mock, call it trickery,
Some hail, call me hero.
There are forces greater than mine,
Forces irrevocable, mathematically superior.
Each day my force grows as well,
Visions imagined supersede the
Tedium of definitions, of boundary lines.
Bend the law, conquer the null, fill the void.
Each day sketch, devise, organize a
New rebellion, follow only one command,
Honor but a single battle cry.
Leap, then fall!
That dancer, your only law,
That heretic, thine only coda.
Action is freedom.
For you are dancer,
Whisper as you leap:
The Fifth Freedom I possess,
The Freedom to Fall.
May 17th, 2013
The sun is beginning to set
Behind the pristine trees
The sunset reflects in the blue pond
Where waters gush so purely and freely
Where the sunset fades
Like a faded tapestry
And like a curtain
The celestial veil of Heaven falls
And hides the sunset from our view
Thus the sky turns black or dark midnight blue
This is the Nocturne of Twilight
Which has long ago faded
Because it is now Night
And the curtain of Heaven
Hides those beautiful colours from our view
Night's tapestry is just as lovely though
So do not cry when the sunsets glow
Has faded
Because Night's tapestry is just as beautiful
~Marian~
night after night
she walks into wonderland
under hazy streetlights
to let thorns
shred her delicate petals
now her rosebud, gone forever
her eyes as dark
as the rolling tires
on the highways
that she sells herself on
sell your soul to the devil
he will let you keep the change
drunk on despair
and living on borrowed time
the wolves of yesterday
the dirt under her fingernails
linger like the voices
of the monsters under her bed
creamy thighs spread wide
for an endless audience
to spoon her milky honey
lick their fingers clean
clean of their conscience
the white washed walls
may the prickly blood
of the cold winter
not stain the white walls
or shrivel the leaves
but lead her to the water
and set sail in a teardrop
A block, a wall. Taller than tall. Away! Far away, forever she will stay. If we have it my way. Because my way is the only way. A contradiction you'll say. A game with no winner; The saint, The sinner. Find a way! It's a new day. Everyday. Mine an yours and their way. Lost my mind! And in no time, you will see; there's a me, and the me that I see. Be free! It could be a melody or a song to sing. New feelings to bring. And in my soul, the story she tells will never fail to lead me. My way. The way. A contradiction I'll say. You'll agree. Love me to hate me. Set you free! Just let it be. You and me.
And thus we bid you welcome to our home,
Finzi-Continis of the new century,
we play jeu de paume all day
within our walled gardens
Deuce! Love! Set!
Hear the birds, the automobiles
Sense a world out there
how vulnerable
Those we think we care not about,
those outside the wall
Ahab's wall, in a sense
We care not to hear about
would prefer not to know about
ever
And they better leave us alone
yet we do not mind spending our evenings
discussing the politics
of people and places we will never see
Not much anyone could have done, was there?
So give us back carefree
Let us happy-go-lucky
Deuce! Love!
Because every once in a while,
I wake up, then, for a moment
And back to the Garden you are
"There's a bubble!"
"There ~ another!"
Amid the childish laughter
we all watch them float away
happy colors winking at us
happily ever after
a blanket of sunshine
Life with the Ponds
There was a girl
that I knew for years
When young, she was strong
And had little fears.
When older, she engaged
to a man with such glory.
But she waited so long
to tell me of Rory.
Then we started, with time,
to bring him along.
And in less than a minute,
her Rory was gone.
He vanished from time
and Amy forgot.
While, as my curse,
I sadly did not.
But then with a bang,
the boy did return,
when he was desperately needed,
when life wouldn't burn.
A brave soldier he was
with little to no fears.
He sat there with Amy
for 2,000 years.
Then we saved the world.
Reset, it would be,
but, in return,
it would lose me.
On my way back
through the turning of time,
I took notice
of this cursed life of mine.
Soon through the flashback,
which showed little glory,
I stopped in my path
to tell Amy a story.
It brought me back
into the world.
In time for a wedding
of a boy and a girl.
I had a calling
from the groom's bride.
"Oh Doctor, my doctor,
you cannot hide
You're not imagined,
you are so real.
Come back through the crack
so that it can heal."
And soon I did
as the wind blew
I arrived in a tux,
and brought something blue.
After awhile,
we set off again
Me, happy as ever,
with my two best friends.
And, after that,
It didn't take long
til we went to war,
til they had River Song.
Her life was confusing,
and converged into mine
I didn't realize
she was a lady of time.
When young, she was stolen.
Being trained, was she.
All of that work
just to kill me.
She almost succeeded
but it wasn't too late.
She gave me her lives.
She'd never regenerate.
Later, we'd marry,
when I was to die.
That's what earth needed
to move forward in time.
But yet I survived
in a robot of me
"Oh, clever Doctor,
how could this be?"
I know it confuses,
but one must not know.
It could fill up your brain
so much it might blow.
Now, on with the story,
it's soon to end.
I do not like it,
but it's hard to pretend.
We found Dinosaurs, cowboys,
we held the power of three,
but then came the angels.
They took them from me.
My sweet little pond,
and one of her boys.
I was so broken.
I lost all my poise.
Before all of this,
we ran, and we ran
But now there's no running
"Goodbye, Raggedy Man.
please help me
locked in a dark room
with one wall, one door
and a window
i see you on the other side
and i can't tell if you're laughing or crying
but i don't dare break the glass
or it could kill us both
and i don't want that
or i would have set myself free long ago
please open the door
i promise to come out quietly
or with my fists clenched
if that's what would make you change your mind
but i'm that kind of guy
you can never tell if i'm serious or not
i might scare you
and i would never want that
so i'll stay behind the glass
One day i felt, that i've accepted the request,
request of sharing, caring and that i need to connect,
it's not just any connect, like that one on the internet,
it's a request of a big event, from the east to the west,
we're just like the stars in the skies,
some of us are beginning and some of us are dying,
ones are winning and the others are learning,
i'm just really really happy though,
i don't care about tomorrow,
that's how i live without any sorrow,
and i don't live under regrets,
the answer is not by smoking a cigarette,
we're stuck in repeating the alphabet, to be honest,
like a shooting rocket, lost in darkness, not promised,
most of us should stop being dishonest,
that we are the largest, generation of the artists,
we have been blessed,
i just wish we all will end up,
in a relationship like the one between me and my bed,
and if you get misunderstood,
don't be upset, just forget,
and deal with the new set,
you're the best version of yourself, yet,
just do a duet with the old and the new you,
you'll sweat, forget and maybe will even melt,
you need to accept, and suggest,
support yourself one hundred perfect,
respect, and stop being against,
and believe that you are best of the best,
just remind yourself you're imperfectly perfect,
and it's not a threat, you are a result,
of what and who you'll collect,
you are the target,
and the target is you,
If you look in the face of evil,
evil's gonna look right back at you!
- Layth Awwad
