Remember tonight for it is the beginning of forever
Sadness is a cancer that eats you up from the inside
Blame is a losers game that you will never ever win
Forget tomorrow as your excuse for procrastination
Live life in this moment which you can never repeat
Give love and hope to everyone with your hello smile
A new dawn breaks as you take control of your world
Remember tonight was the beginning of your forever
In the hustle and bustle of a metropolitan city, I searched you down. Stalked, hunted and fished you out. Out of the 7 billion people, I found you, and that was all which mattered. You. Your hair still soft and ruffled with care, you lips still pink without usage, or so I hoped, your eyes, sparkling as always behind your thin framed silver glasses. You, with your bold look, walking across the streets like you own them. You, with you heavy and slow steps walking to your destination with a purpose to conquer. You.
And in that unknown city, so far away from the root of our existence, with mindless honks of drivers and a play of lights everywhere, I found somebody that I used to know. A face not forgotten, yet changed, eyes which haunted reappeared and a voice which lingered rung in my ears. I found you.
I would purposely bump into you, pretending to be in a hurry, pretending to not recognize the only face embedded in my soul, drop my valuables, say something like my identification card, give you a quick smile and a sorry and run off and disappear into the wave of the crowd.
You would just stare at the card. Be reminded of a life so distant, possibly a life forgotten, probably forcefully. Be reminded of how a girl, crazy and wild, young in her years, had come and gone from your life. Be reminded of the question you always used to ask yourself "what happened?"
I would hide to see your face grow white. You had just seen a ghost. A ghost of your past, who you had forcefully left behind. Now, after decades of separation, years spent not even giving it a second thought, years spent away, you were reminded again. The fire was lit again. The fire which made you pick up the card, stare at the number and automatically dial it up. I would say "hello", at which you would cut the call still unsure of what you would say. Scanning, devising a plan, you would call again, only this time you would talk.
"Hello", I would say confused.
"I found your wallet miss, remember you bumped into me earlier?"
"oh yes thank god for you sir. Tell me where you are and I shall come and pick it up."
and with that you would let yourself go.
after all, a "hi" i all we need to melt, to fall, to die, all over again right?
and with that I woke up to the alarm screaming in my ears to remind me that reality still persisted, and that it would take more than a dream to get you back.
Your standing at a cross roads
And you dont no which way to go
To the left is a road you've never known
To the right is the life youve lived and grown
As the rain pours down along your face
Your confused on which choice to make
Your scared of change and risk
You always belive youll fail the test
Even though your stronger than most
You dont belive you have anythin to boast
A predictiable stable life is what you want,
Descions and stress give you haunt
A fulfiled life is all you want,
My Wandering woman just follow your heart,
Dont worry what others think, its about what you want
Let nature be your guide and show you the way,
Choose a path and dont ever stray
Follow the sun the moon and stars,
Theyll always stay bright for you,
Just look to the sky whenever your blue,
Take a deep breathe and let it all flow out,
Before you make a descions no matter what about,
While your at the crossroads wanderer,
Always remember not to ponder,
Follow your gut and nothin but,
Dont let outside fears take control,
Your demons are no match for your heart,
Even though they may never let go,
Fight through them all with courage and wit,
Think on your toes and never sit,
Youll get through this wandering woman,
Never doubt what you are doing.
Never let your smile go dim,
It will brighten up any room,
Keep your eyes open wide
They are as blue as the sky,
Tread your gorgous soul onward dear,
There is nothing for you to fear.
As you stand at the crossroads before you
Remember these words i said to you,
If you choose the road you dont know
Or the one that youve grown accustom too
Just make sure that youll be happy first,
Happiness is your primary first.
Everything else can wait,
And i myself can always wait,
Ill wait until your seas have calmed,
Until it is safe to climb a shore,
Until your storm has subsided,
And you can no longer deny it.
Never the less ill always be by your side,
And for you ill hang up my pride.
You'll always have a place in my heart,
You always have right from the start.
I think it's over.
I think it's gone.
I look back at it fondly.
In that darkened lawn.
I miss it dearly, this much is true.
But albeit, I'll remember it too.
There is a girl who calls out my name.
There's no chance.
But with my thoughts I will stay.
For sadly, in bittersweet.
I'll have to live this way.
Ever said something that made you look stupid?
Ever fell down the stairs on your way to class?
Ever sent a private text to the wrong person?
Ever been stood up in the pouring rain?
Ever had your laptop break in the middle of an important essay?
Ever walked in on your grand parents having sex?
Ever lost your respect?
Ever told the wrong person a secret?
Ever found out your favorite teacher quit because of you?
Ever been forced to listen to Justin Beiber with your little sister?
Ever dropped your phone in the toilet?
Ever been lied to by your best friend?
Ever lost your lover to a whore?
Ever had your flip flops break in the middle of the street?
Ever sat in gum?
Ever found out your lovers actually gay?
Ever had to baby sit a unruly child instead of going to a dance?
Ever rolled in the grass and had an allergic reaction?
Ever been caught having sex by your parents?
Ever accidentally picked a fight with the strongest person in school?
Ever had no one take your side?
Ever walked around with a giant hole in back of your pants?
Ever been pulled over when you were all ready late?
Ever saw your ex with a Megan Fox look a like?
Ever had all your clothes not fit?
But just remember whatever happens…
I still love you.
I answered a call in the freezing night ....
A cold tone from a distance...
I was numb ... stunned by the news...
The picture of you cold fear dripping from my hands
My soul was screaming.. WHY YOU? WHY YOU?
Tried to recall your overjoyed laughters ..
Breaking the news of a Christmas eve together..
Only yesterday we both shared the smiles..
In a split second.. I was left alone..
My happiness was ripped my heart was broken
The visuals of a grand dinner for us two kept flashing in my head
We dined together smiling, dancing and kissing...
But Those filthy soldiers..
These blood thirsty monsters with their killing machines...
Heartless and brutal , they spared no one...
They gunned you down,
The whole platoon died in this bloody war..
Braved myself ... I took a look at the picture of you..
i took a breath I tried to remember the last look on your face
the moment when i knew you were gone forever
a tear slipped down my cheek
screaming my heart out as i stumbled and fell
with the picture of you... the memories of us...
Tore us apart... yes they did
Killed our love?... Never .. ever...
the picture of you cold fear dripping from my hands...
Good bye my love....
There are loves that are inseparable,
loves that never leave.
Loves that can define us
This much I do believe.
I remember well my own first “love”.
A Love I brought to bed.
I brought along a flashlight too
To discern the words Love said.
When all my family was asleep
from my pillow I’d retrieve
My treasure from the Library
And I’d begin to read.
That was my first chapter book,
A mystery, I recall.
Of all the words I’ve read or writ
It was the start of all.
I like to find that book again
and hold in one more time.-
and in the touch and smell of it
Recall a simpler time.
I look down at my palette, and see the paints melting together.
I remember when we were like that,
colouring the canvas with life.
You were the deep, dark blue of an ocean at night,
and I was the grey of clouds.
You brought vividness to me,
and turned my dull hue to vibrance.
So how did we get like this?
The painter’s brush mixed us too far,
turning our kaleidoscope into a jumbled mess.
Murky brown, and unusable,
unable to be separated.
We’ve become so close our colours have merged
and we are no longer separates.
Wherever I go I take some of you with me.
Dragged across the canvas behind me,
like an afterthought.
The trail of a comet.
A past that will never really leave me
because by now it’s a part of me.
It’s second nature
to think of you when my mind wanders
and to reach for your hand without thought.
You’ve changed me forever
and I can never go back
to a time before you
But why would I want to?
I'd been to hell
It was...a horror...
you can't imagine
But your smile shined
Not sexual or desirous, just real
At a very unexpected time
And became the
Most enjoyable highlight
Of a very dark time
That I will always quietly remember
Somehow I always seem to forget that I am not your everything,
I am not your life's story
But a mere chapter.
Perhaps a only page or two.
And it's this that worries me, because what about all this time I'm invested in you?
The seeds I planted in your chest have bloomed,
But my fingers will not be the last to pick from them
And my hands will not be the last to graze across the meadows of your skin
Nor will my lips be the last to kiss away your imperfections.
I forget that eventually ,
you will find another girl.
One who's lovely and prettier than I,
One who can tell you how she feels
And who can make decisions.
Who doesn't hinder but help.
One who can give you everything you've ever wanted in the world,
Not just her heart.
And I can't help but feel that I'd be happy for her
Because if it wasn't me at least it would mean you were happy
And then maybe you'll feel at home in her embrace, more so than mine
Perhaps the words she'll speak to you will be beautiful flowers,
instead of the weeds that seem to fall from my mouth.
And I suppose that eventually you will invest your time in her, your future
And that's when I'll become your past,
The ink blots and coffee rings,
Along the old yellow papers,
Or maybe an old flower pressed between the pages,
I think I'd like that
Because maybe you'd remember me as something beautiful
And if not that at least you'd be happy