I saw you the first time at my minimum wage job.
Vibrant and curly.
Every moment started slowing down
and as I counted the minutes you faded away.
With a big beautiful smile of course.
But no longer there.
Then after you left my sight
another image persisted.
One of you walking back into my store.
But this image was long out of reach.
The second time I saw you I forgot to get your number.
I consider myself a fool for this,
but you were still standing
and looking at me.
Absolutely straight into my eyes.
I could hardly make your sandwich.
The eyes of my throbbing soul.
Without the hustly bustle of my own mentality,
I would have taken you to Mars right then and there.
With all your curly hair.
And all your fucking smiles.
My earnings for the biweekly pay
couldnt surmount the glory
that is your absolute stunningness.
Crystals are rushing the pathways of you, gleaming.
They are resting on the sound of a wave dreaming
alive all of the irresistible magnetism's that live here.
All the pieces of you that chime my bells of soul places;
You ring me true.
There's something about the complement that comes with you.
In a hot place of purity, we could become
the warmth of this desire, long numbed.
Vaporizing the cold from our flesh.
Programming dissipates within the crystal daze.
Is wrong of me to want a wiser way ?
[ Than that of the dullness of those in my range. ]
I love that I can always find you,
a few words over hanging on the same page.
I as the Princess, and you as the Sage.
I wish I could live in the daze forever.
A space where blasphemy does not reckon itself.
I wish it didn't matter whether,
your walk has been long or short, here in this passing life.
But I am blessed to have over lapped your time, so i sigh.
And wish upon another sunny time, with you.
There once was a woman so gorgeous so frail,
Who never removed her wedding day veil.
She sat in her home and smiled and wept,
And clung to her breast a photo she kept.
This photo was taken of her most betrothed,
A man who she loved, and man who she loathed.
A man with a beautiful porcelain smile,
A man who left her alone at the aisle.
So long story short she chopped him in slices,
And used him quite literally to cure her own vices.
A piece for brunch, lunch, and more,
A piece for the Wilsons who moved in next door.
Sorry to say there's no message to teach,
No metaphor here or limerick to preach.
This is a story that cures no desires,
A story with few (if any) admirers.
He said he loved me
But never got a chance to prove
She proved she loved me
But never got a chance to say it
He left and then came back
But when he did he always ask me about me
She was always by my side
But she never really asked me about me
We are a family and sometimes it's hard to decide
I love both of them
But its hard to decide
One of them left
the last time I saw him
But he never came back
There is one man
He was the most special man of all
He was always there
He never left even when I pushed him away
He proved it and never stop saying it
When the sun came out
He told be "Here is your gift"
It was a new day
When the sun came down
He told me "Here is your peace"
And I rested all night long
My father left
But Jesus came
My mother never asked
But Jesus already knew
I cant judge him for what he did
Because I'm not perfect
I love them both and I wont choose
But I will do s pray
Equally for both
Not so that they ask for forgiveness
But so that they forgive themselves
So that they understand that he died
On a Cross
Remember that night you called me crying?
At one in the morning 'cuz things had turned violent?
I picked up even though it was late
And it was a school night
I needed my sleep
But I stayed on the phone and calmed you down
Crushed all the rumors circulation around
Never could you extend the same courtesy
Get everything off my chest in a text and press "send"
Expecting some advice or an "it'll be okay"
Instead I get back one letter
Not even a sentence to comfort
Let me turn around and do the same thing
You'd have no hesitation in calling me selfish
Cold hearted, accusing me of being jealous
As if you could handle a walk in my shoes
As if you know half of what I've been through
Remember when I said that I had feelings too?
That I wasn't just a human form of a diary for you to use?
Like I have all these thoughts and emotions bottled up inside that you haven't once considered or asked if I was fine
Scenarios circle in my head
Late at night I replay all the things we said
Entire conversations, beginning to end
Perhaps I think too much
But that doesn't change
The fact you never want to listen to me
If you're gonna play it like it's every man for himself
I have no problem never asking you for help
I have no problem hitting reject
On the phone when you call
I could be reading instead
And by reading I mean a book, not one of your long texts
140 characters describing how bad your life is
As if you don't have a roof over your head
Parents who love you, a nice warm bed
I'm not saying you don't have problems, everyone does
I'd never put mine out there
I know how you judge
You'd tell me I'm insecure
Or to just grow up
Never once considering what I'm going through is actually tough
Does that jeweled crown from your head need to fall?
To convince you I'm imperfect yet worthy?
I don't care if you're the queen of your world
You can't judge my path unless you've walked my journey
I'm not your personal therapist
Never will be
Here's the key
Monitoring your life
Ever beat, body weak
Your heart struggled to keep you alive
This shouldn't come as a shock
We've known for months
I knew you weren't here anymore
Simply existing physically
Your body wiped clean of all mental capability
Like an ocean tide batters the shore, you were diminishing
Until there was nothing else to take
Reminiscing back to the signs we ignored foolishly
Never thinking it was more than a slight lapse of memory
From a call to confirm your location
To forgetting the youngest generation
Temporary confusion faded to permanent loss
As you laid unconscious
The mask on your face providing oxygen
If you could hear me
Were you silently screaming for me to shut up so you could rest
Knowing you , you were concerned with my school and why I was at the hospital instead
Did you remember my name?
Could you conjure up my face?
Behind those delicate eyelids that hadn't done more than fluttered in days?
Remember reading to me as I say on your knee?
How we'd admire nature with a hand full of bird seed?
I though I'd accepted the fact you were gone
When we first suspected the disease
The one I wish was never created, never existed, that erased my existence from your mind indefinitely
As I stared at your face, peacefully sedated, I felt a twinge of pain
How is it this woman I knew to be so strong
Might as well have had fragile stamped on her face
A being so loving
Was now so faint
Like a painting left in the rain
Your colors had began to fade
Until they were white
White like the sheets, the walls, and the floor
The absence of life that exists behind hospital doors
Your body slowly tried to quit
Hard headed as always . You said not yet
So frail you held on to the little life you had left
Until Heaven loosened your hold
I find solace knowing you're in a better place
Where you can remember lived one's names
Watching over us in the paths we take
I'm resigned now to the fact you had to go
But as long as you could
You made God wait
birthday poem for my beloved
Happy birthday doesn't seem to suffice
When the one you love is all so nice
So here's a poem from my heart
Hope it reaches yours though oceans apart
Bless the day when you were born
When angels sang and heaven was forlorn
Losing you was not their aim
But the time was ripe, all the same
Tears were shed in the heavenlies
Your mates up there threw you a gathering
I was there and feeling sad
You said don't worry, I'll find you, yet!
That was some decades ago
And here we are found and found
Elliot York was to be born
To create HP, so we no longer need to mourn
Almost a year, oh what a ride
is it amazing, that we're still out of sight
visions of future laughter furnishes my nights
my days are not so bad with you as my guide
wishing you well and wishing you gain
wisdom and wealth and hopes and dreams
Four plus nine is not so young
only a little while more and we'll both be done
K Balachandran Oct 24
yes, indeed in the long run we'll all have wings to fly..ha ha
makes me underline the fact that love, life angst and dance of happiness all are transient..so what?
Thank you Shaq
I want long , thin legs
A skinny waist
And collar bones that stick out.
I want to be pretty.
But what I didn't want
Was the price
Using constant excuses
I wanted to be perfect
I soon reached my goal,
But was the price I paid worth it?
Numbers Not Names
I've been trying for years to get this thing down
The thing they call the marriage game
Been on the alter so many times around
I've given them all numbers instead of names
Well #1 didn't last to long
Blame it on being new to the rules
Thought of her as a slave starting on my wedding day
She thought of me as a mean cruel fool
Through #2, 3, and 4 I was much better
Though I still didn't have it down
#5, 6, 7, 8 I should have dropped after the first date
Then my lawyer bills wouldn't be such a mound
But #33 was always sweet to me
I remember how #42 gave her love away
One thing I did that wasn't dumb was to keep a wedding album
Where I could put a number to every face
It was #84 that was such a bore
Should have stuck with #13 the beauty queen
Or was that #88, it's hard to keep the ladies straight
Perhaps I should study that album in between
Looking back on it now, to the ladies I take a bow
I loved each and everyone like a wife
Treating them like royalty came easily to me
As I gave each and every one of them the best two months of their lives
It’s funny how looking at a picture of you,
from so long since looking into your eyes,
I can still remember every breath caught, every moment of each second lived,
every silver touch standing in your eyes, like being seen for the first time,
until you saw too much too deep too fast,
and you blinked and I was gone.
Gone from your thoughts and your life and your love,
moved to another, more worthy,
upon whom you look longer, stand taller, gaze deeper
than I can ever hope to be.