You're never coming back
It all ended just like the movies
You were the main character
She was your leading lady
I was the obstacle you had to overcome
And you rode off into the sunset with her
And I was hurt and alone
The way it was meant to be
You never see the antagonist's ever after
Close the book and walk away,
I have to try to everyday.
To suppress the memories until they fade.
All those conversations, everyday.
Rewrite the lines and the leading role,
Replace the feelings that he'd once stole.
The underlying character, the one untold.
The pages torn out, with the pain they hold.
The chapter gone, but the stories so alive.
Smiles and tears, feelings revived.
Just a peek, a little reminder is all.
The ease that it takes, to secretly fall.
This book of secrets that only we see.
The stories inside we must never read.
Must bury these pages deep within.
Before the book is left open.
The passage is dark and deep
Forever going in the darkest dreams
The rooms all different
All bathed in the half light
As I'm dragged along
Twisting and contorting
To see it all before I'm gone
A room with knives
And on solitary chair
Where I would sit and loving stare
It leads to a room of headless snakes
A twirling kaleidoscope
Of red and green
Tinged in death
The room in which
I was locked
The door is stuck
I am weak
There is no
way to escape
of haunting halls
Leading down the hall again
Leads us to a room in which
Indian movies music played
The screen danced and flicked
while your body flicked along,
foam crawling out your mouth
eyes rolling back
In this boys dream
a mother screams
And I can do nothing,
Of youth and age and memories
Another door yet to open
of sickness repression
Of warmth and senses
Smell taste touch
The heat burns of this childish lust
The wolf froths and growls
Its teeth glisten
And I scream
A dream within a dream
We climb up the stairs
as they curve and crack
splinters of this dream
ever more it will seem
never real to me
of a room within a room
the tiniest doors for tiny hands and tiny dreams
I but ever small
The room has shrunken
and I will ever crawl
The intoxication fades,
we feel the subtle torment
of piercing venality.
This pain leading us
to fields of unrequited affection;
Despondent emotions drifting
towards the center of night.
We are lost, stumbling
through the void into
these broken plains; those
untended fences damaged
by the force of storms.
Demons in the mist,
Phantoms trampling love;
T'is the nature of the season,
the epilogue of desires.
Am I bad at making sentences that are? Palindromes… are that: Sentences making at bad.
Importantly, however, words not letters are what go backwards and forwards in just this poem. This just in: forwards and backwards. Go! What? Are letters not words? However importantly...
It is that thing beckoning us to come away, far from things other than different parts inside us,
leading us with its inspiration to places within ourselves, taking us from Earth to 1 page,
making us believe something that we don’t know. Know. Don’t we? That something. Believe us.
Making page 1: To – Earth From – us
Taking ourselves within places to inspiration.
It’s with us,
Leading us inside parts different than other things from far away.
Come to us, beckoning thing.
That is it.
Love isn’t poetic, but we still try, we’re pathetic, so why do we cry,
We all learn by failing, that’s why we fail so hard.
Learning, and seeing, and breathing, it’s what we do,
And every one of us is leading, the pack through and through,
Every man for himself, Every daughter too,
Will keep going on, Will be reborn anew,
And really, I love you.
The morning sun trickles through the curtains as a reminder of another day begins
finding the rhythm of life an echo of days past, just a picture out of time unable to break the
cycle of days leading to the recycling of moments of prior.
To hope and pray for a change to change my life to make me new was no where to be found. Placed my hope some thought to be safe, but not the case found pain and sadness in their wake. Anger, fighting, regret and mistreatment lead to exhaustion and feelings of coldness and emptiness.
When realization sparked like a light bulb going off in my head. This for all of it's faults was my prayer answered a change in my life to change my stagnant life and give it some heat good, bad or indifferent. So watch for the answers to your prayers they may not be as obvious as we think they should be.
I'm not saying
I wouldn't dance with you now
I just can't remember how
We every got to swaying
I'm not trying
to break your sea-glass heart
but I've splintered apart
Under the scrutiny of redefining
I'm not leaving
but I'm catching the midnight train
Wiping my ticket of a tear stain
I have a new life I'm leading
Thank you for leading by bad example.
Thank you for showing me exactly not what to do with my life. Thank you for telling me I’m worthless, and making me realize exactly how much I'm worth. Thank you for showing me how much better off I am without you. Thank you for motivating me to never need anyone’s money, for motivating me to be independent, to rely on myself and my own hard work. Thank you for showing me how strong I truly am. Thank you for making me realize my own integrity, my own determination to be exactly myself, and the best version of myself, no matter what happens. Thank you for showing me that I’ll be true to myself and believe in myself against all odds. Against the odds of a father saying, no, you don’t love me; you’re just here for the money like everyone else. Thank you for showing me that I’m more mature and capable than a grown man who managed to create multiple families.
Really, thank you. Thank you for doing a terrible job at being a father, and making me even more determined to be the best parent ever. You did a really bad job, but got pretty damn good results. You pretty much won the lottery (as I’m sure you've realized by now.. a little too late).
Thank you for making me who I am today. You did a bang up job.
Long after I'm gone.
His name will be around.
It was before I was born.
It will be after I'm gone.
HE has multiple names besides Jesus.
He's Higher than high.
He's Greater than great.
He's Alpha and Omega.
He's Prince of Peace.
The Everlasting Father.
Yes, Jesus life have many teaching.
And it has ways to leading us to better situation.
Through him our spiritual side grows.
Yes, long after I'm gone.
His name will live on.
He's the King of the kingdom throne.
He's the Almighty.
He's the King of Kings.
All others just wearing an appointed title.
All administrations and government He has his hands upon.
He's the true decision maker.
We are only his followers.
And they will be here long after I'm gone.