Watch out, this girls heartless
She takes out her insults
And blood she does draw..
Because she holds on to tight, to her victims..
And loses sight of herself
She always hurts someone
Even though she just try's to help..
And despite how much she gives to others
She can't give something
That was stripped bare
She can't give her heart, if it never really was there..
This is over a boy
Yep that's me..
“I feel very dependent on people’s mood and that’s a really bad addiction because you’re always expecting something good when it’s not up to your own actions.
You think people can make you happy but the thing is
They don’t even know how you feel about them and most of the time, they just don’t fucking care.
They like you for a day and find you annoying.
When they see you, they’re smiling but they hate you in secret.
They wanna make you believe you’re a nice person
But stab you in the back when they talk to other people.
What’s gone wrong I wonder and who are they?
I found out they were closer than I’d like to own up.
My neighbors, my classmates
Former friends or students I’ve talked to once cause they asked for my help.
They’re everywhere and think the same.
They swear on truth but their mouths speak poison
Their eyes are snakes and whatever they say, it’s a lie that comes out.
How can they be honest when they’re lying to themselves?
They don’t know about love, about trust.
I hate how they pretend to be free when they’re just lost but they don’t know it
They’re ignorant and they’re mean and I’m so sick of their tricks
I’d do anything to make them see it.
It’s hurtful and destructive
The anger won't wear off
And I wanna stop believing they know what they’re capable of.
Someday they’ll wake up and realize it’s useless to claim they don’t care
Cause they don’t know it but they do.
That’s a thing they hate to admit but they should.
And it’s alright to be weak
Being true isn’t a flaw.
Stop kicking your heart so hard
It’s just waiting for you to grow".
Stood way out there,
And ran all his fingers
Through his hair.
He took a deep breath
As the morning arose,
Smiling so wide
That it wrinkled his nose.
He saw on the horizon
A crackle of rain -
And touches of dew
Resting on his new cane.
But when Thurgood paused
And peered over his lawn,
And studied his yard
In the new light of dawn,
He kicked at his heel
Like an old Mother Hen.
And he grumbled aloud,
"Oh no, not again!"
He followed the Quiltwork
Patch Grass to the side,
Where the Fennilen Fern
And the Trugg usually hide,
Through the green, where
The collups and roses were set,
All needing a pruning he
Hadn't faced yet.
And there it was,
Still tugging the string,
That wicked and
Pimply pompous old thing.
Standing there near the hill,
Right beside an old post,
Where it could drink in the morning,
And gaze down the coast.
"Five times you've been planted,"
Said good Fenwick that day.
He was well wearied and worn.
His head almost gray.
"You did not like the corner,
Where the daffodils grow.
You did not care for the tulips,
Row upon row."
"You turned away from the Ivy
That climbs to the sea.
You are a most contentious,
And troublesome tree."
"Was the fence near the gate
Not a worthy estate?
That you had to pull free,
And run toward the sea?"
"The poplars were kind,
But you turned clear away.
I wonder just what
You are thinking today."
But the tree did not nod,
As far as Thurgood could tell.
For it could taste the sweet ocean,
And feel her waves swell.
It watched the soft moon
Drifting low in the sky,
And stretched out its branches
Ever so high.
And Thurgood shook his head,
And with an inkling of pride
Said, "Does this make you happy?"
And he smiled wide.
He turned on his heels,
And watched the soft sea.
Today there was quiet
Along this emerald key.
Her waves gently licking
The shoreline hello,
And morningtime greeting
Her usual glow.
"It is a nice view,"
He heard himself say.
As dawn gently tap-tapped
To nature's soiree.
And he grinned, "You old codger.
Have it your way.
And a good mornin' to you.
I believe this is your day."
Copyright © 2013 Richard D. Remler
"Even if I knew that tomorrow
the world would go to pieces,
I would still plant my apple tree."
"Thorned coronet or a spine ridden diadem
Columns of my vertebrae you rowed up to the side of them
And slid a braquemard, home plated, in my diaphragm
Brutus to a Julius or Cassius to a caligula
You're shaking when you speak and you act rather ambiguous
Piteous pit falling I'm spitballing
And ballin up all of my shit
With a straw on my lips"
i am not your diadem, i wear that crown
beside no man
and i made you a diagram, warned how i felt
bout lion men
these days i get inside of them
and make their caves abandoned dens
and slay the sly clawed underhands
who tried to eat the wunderkid
you see these eyes? don’t lie to them
i’ll shoot the guy who tries to land
a bullseye in my vibrant lens
you’re crawling back to call me sin
not violent, i'm just not contending
i will not be rendered weapon
when i’m more like armageddon
in the body of a woman
if history was written off the way that you wanted
i’d be a trident in the hands of a tyrant, loveless
and you would be a poor king, so innocently luckless
recklessly denying of each bloody broken promise
so if we’re drawing from the vein of the kings and the crowns
let history go ahead and keep repeating itself now
i’ll be the advisor to the feckless frown
until the body count's a recklessly drawn out map of the grounds
behind the scenes yeah i can see you now
if you wanna save the city you can go 'head and put that ego down
and no, this isn’t ‘bout battle or them soldier crowds
it’s ‘bout what’s better for the people in this starving town
so i will play your brutus and survive with stealth
ides of march around the bend, you love your pedestal
sic semper tyrannis, you declared it yourself
et tu brute? yeah i’m just here to help
Just a few short months
That's all that's passed
But still I feel I've grown
Even if just the slightest bit
Sometimes all it takes
Is a new setting
and new a place
My eyes have opened
I know how lucky I've been
My family loves me
And I love them
This is all that is really needed
But I have so much more
A home to go to
Friends to smile with
Some don't even have a smile
Some don't have a home
Or a family that loves them
Yet I am fortunate enough to have this
is just like licking a doughnut
can not be done
without licking your lips!
I don’t want to hate you
Despise you, place you
Down there in the back of my mind
A dark and brooding place where no one but me will find
You, I don’t want to hate you
I don’t want to blame you
As the reason I have taken sadness as my lover
I don’t want to lay awake at night
Wishing evil to befall you
I don’t want stay awake at night
Having to constantly fight this feeling
I don’t want to hate your being
I don’t want to be confused
Wondering what drove you to abuse
The love I had for you
I don’t want to go again
To that dark foreboding plane
Where a horned being asked me what he can do
For me, I don’t want to even take a moment to consider
To let hatred be my Hearts leader
And yet as I sit here
I feel it boiling, slowly soiling my soul
Painting it black, turning into a black hole
Sucking, taking devouring me whole
It eats me, taking away my bliss from me
And so I am left alone
To again trek across this sea of emotion
Knowing that somewhere within the water’s
A monster lurks just waiting for me to slip
A single moment a like a whip
Coiled and ready it will nip me
And take me, I don’t want to hate you
In the end you we all must do what we have to
But I can never again love you.
She thinks of nobody but herself
But still her bedrooms filled with nails she falls
And always seems to land on her wrist
Gashes a centimeter wide she needs stitches she needs to call an ambulance
She'll bleed out! God dammit she'll bleed out!
But she's not ready to die yet so she stitches herself up
Hoping she hasn't drained too much
Because she loves the sting the reason she lives is for the sting
And the DRUGS
PILLS: Oxy, Percocet, Vicodin, Demerol
She sniffs them she snorts them she even fucking chews them!
She'll do anything as long as she can float
She won't admit it but she loves life she loves the drugs
And pain and abuse that come with life
She loves the pain, oh god damn, she loves the pain
So she stitches herself back up she doesn't want to die
Repeat repeat she does it again
Dripping on the kitchen tile but this time is different
This time she's forgotten about the drugs and the pain
She's focused on her wrist and her wrist and her blade and her wrist
Too deep, she's gone too deep again
But she doesn't care she's not stitching herself back up
She's ready to die with not enough drugs and
Too much pain
She's ready to leave this world behind
Ready to leave the pills
Don't leave me don't leave me
I love you I love you
Grab the needle, please get the thread
Please just stitch yourself back up stitch yourself back up
I cannot sleep until you're home. The second that you slip under the sheets beside me I will allow sleep to take me, almost brutally. Having you beside me is enough, there need be no communication.
No-one is closer to me than you and yet, I lead a secret inner life that I just can't explain to you. I have no idea how you would respond if I were to communicate these truths. Some of these thoughts make little sense, even to me. It is enough just to have you by my side. No-one can, or should, know everything about another. You know, without knowing.
But you will be home soon. I lie here, so far from sleep, yet exhausted, and trace the contours of your face in my mind, over and over again. Your face is like granite, you are bearlike, fierce; safety, protection and sleep. You will be home, and I will lose myself in dreams that I cannot fall into while you are absent. In those dreams, there are things I cannot face alone in this bed.
You will be home, to free me from exhaustion, you will come home.
Jaylin was scared and detrimental -
with runaway scars,
his heavy breathing,
and the wolves chasing such a forgotten soul.
"I'm more afraid of death then before,
more afraid of the teeth ripping through my skull,
I have to end this dream.",
He said screaming, knowing it was but of no dream.
Is the end just above the harassing, or still just a mere speck waiting to be seen.
he screamed again, as the snow touched his face
- wishing his fellow friends could hear.
the mindless memories all over his body warned him.
It warned him he was still wanted by them.
Still yearned by the ones of which owned the forest.
"Jaylin, run! Run now!"
this wasn't his mind, but the mysteries' wind that ran next to him.
He heard it, but didn't know what it said until he saw them -
barking, running and almost screaming.
Jaylin stopped to listen to this screaming,
as if the screaming was the sound of a thousand ghosts that the Wolves killed.
Hearing all this he knew he wasn't the first.
"How could the wind know?,
Why are there some many voices in my head!?,
I don't want to be trapped like the other lost and forgotten souls!,
I don't want to be screaming in endless time of death !",
what was wished for was soon put away in the hollow sound of the universe.
they found him.
and the taste of death
where all things felt when Jaylin was bitten.
Bitten by The Wolves.