The hallway seemed to sway with the motion of the tears filling my eyes. I tried to keep going to get to the door, but I collapsed there in the hall. The weight crashing down on me. She was dead. My only love was dead. I’d been with her for six years and we’d been waiting to get married. That was all over now. They had killed her. I laid my head in my hands and let it all go. I fell spiraling down into the darkness at the edge of my consciousness. My very last thoughts echoing in my head as I slipped into this grief coma, they would all pay, they would pay.

The clock on the wall ticked loudly as I made my way to Mr. Jefferson’s office. The hallways were empty, an unusual thing for a Monday morning in a business firm. I tried not to let it get in my head. I had a job to fulfill. If I didn't get this one right the boss would surely wring my neck. She wasn't the most understanding person, and tolerated no mistakes. A dark cherry wood door lay at the end of the long hallway with a silver plate spelling out Mr. Jefferson’s office. All the other doors I had passed had, had similar ones.
I knocked on the door quietly waiting for an invitation inside. I took a deep breath and steady myself. Telling myself I had to do this. There was still no beckoning to come in so I knocked louder, but was only greeted by silence. I opened the door quickly and peered in. Mr. Jefferson laid slumped over his paper work in the messy piles on his desk.
A bullet through his head. Well this was just great now the boss had another reason to chew me out. I closed the door quietly and made my way to the body. Blood spilled from the back of his head and off his shoulders dripping into the puddle on the floor. I took my phone from my pants pocket and called Leo.
“Hey, Leo we got a problem, Jefferson’s already dead. They’re a step ahead of us. What’s my next move?” the line was silent for a minute until he replied, “what was the cause of death?” I looked at the back of Jefferson’s head one more time to make sure that was no other abrasions. “Bullet wound in the back of his head, no sign of struggle either.”
“Alright, I’ll inform the boss. You should probably make your way back to the headquarters. I can tell you now the boss isn't going to be happy.” I sighed I already new that. The bitch had been riding my ass all month now. It wouldn't hurt her to give us all a break once in a while. I closed my phone. I made my way out the door. No doubt someone else would find Jefferson and would immediately go for the video tapes.
Luckily I didn't come here alone, I brought my computer genius along, that could erase us from every tape and cover his tracks. I gave a polite smile to each person I passed and had to fight to walk calm and smoothly out the front doors. Brain already waited inside the car looking anxious. We were both fairly new to the working in the field. Usually the boss assigned me on small assignments. I got inside the drivers side and pulled out right away. “Jefferson was already dead when I got there, bullet wound to the back of the head, what I don’t understand is how no one heard it, or why he didn't struggle,” I told Brian. “Maybe a silencer on the gun? And perhaps his lack of struggle was because there was a gun pointed at his head?” I thought it over. It was possible but that was different from all the others. “They usually cover their tracks better than that though,” I looked over at Brain whose face was crinkled by his deep thoughts. “Maybe they were in a rush?” The wound had looked freshly made. “Perhaps,” I said still mulling it over. “I suppose we’ll just have to wait for the police reports.”

As I had figured Liana was furious. “How is it that four out of seven of the people I've told you to get information from then take out have ended up already dead when you got there?” She spit angrily in my face. Liana was a scary lady but she didn't scare me.
“I don’t know you tell me,” I said and smiled at her. I could feel the audience behind me stop what they were doing and cringe. “Do you think this is funny?” Liana said quietly.
Her face had gone rigid and her fist clenched so tightly at her sides, the knuckles had turned a ghostly white.
I knew which battles to fight and which to surrender. “No, nothing is funny,” I spat out clenching my jaw. I really hated this stupid job. If it wasn't for Liana keeping my brother alive I wouldn't be here. And just as I thought it Liana cheerfully reminded me, “do remember darling, your brothers life lies in my hands. One wrong move and it’s bye bye brother, understood?” Her dark eye’s drilling into mine. The feeling of hatred seeped from my body as it was overflowing inside me now. “Understood,” I growled.
“Good, now get out. I’ll call you when I have your next assignment.” She turned but stopped to look back,
“ and next time do not mess up,” then walked back into her office slamming the door.
I let the breath I had been holding out and left quickly before they all burned holes into me with their heavy glares. I made my way to Kyle’s room. The walls were painted dark blue with small silver stars painted all over. I had painted it for him, he loved the stars. “Kyle?” I said shakily looking down at the boy. His tiny body shaking in pain. He wouldn't eat. The vomiting broke his bones sometimes. His bones stuck through his skin like his skin had only been draped over his frail bones. The tears flowed from my eye’s and down my face. He was only fifteen.
He was so sick, I just wanted him to be okay. Healthy again. The reason I’d signed up to join this place was because they promised to save him. They said as soon as I finished the biggest assignment they would heal him. But I grew more and more doubtful.
Kyle had been infected, by the scientist. A super parasite they’d created. It caused brain disorders, like anorexia. Kyle’s brain was being attacked making him suicidal and making him believe he was anorexic. Making him believe he had to do these things. When it first started he was only depressed. He began cutting himself. When I saw the deep cuts in his arms and on his stomach  I asked him about it and his answer had been, “I didn't want to do I just had to“ . At the time I’d misunderstood him.
Now I knew. He literally had been forced by the parasites inside his brain.
His eye’s were closed and I could see the struggle it took for him to intake each breath. His arms, thin ropes, laid at his side. It took a massive amount of energy and strength for him to even turn his head. “I will fix this Kyle, believe in me when I tell you that, I love you.” I kissed his cold forehead and left shutting the door slowly.

What kind of games are you playing?
Hide and seek? Win Lose or Draw?
I am sick of these games of yours
Not a slot machine in a video games center...
Not also your fancy new games in a computer..

Am I not worth?
Am I just the games you used to play?
Am I your latest collections of Barbie doll ?
Felt used and manipulated
You treated me like a toy...

Where have you been?
Unanswered messages, 101 missed calls
So... this is what your true love is...
You told me to find someone else..
And You told me to move on...
It really is not fair..
Cause you told me to always play fair..

Promises made are promises kept..
When you cant be here..
Just tell me where you are?
You cant be trusted anymore..
Tell me where have you been to?
Tell me how many hearts have you broken?
Where have you been...
Where have you been....

“Let’s play a game,” I whispered;
And the night sky swallowed my words.

“Would you rather watch
the stars,
the clouds,
the waterfalls,
or the snowflakes?”

“The stars,” you replied without
pausing for thought.

And it was then that I knew you were a dreamer,
like me.

For we dream in stars
And we sing in constellations.

We see not a sky,
But a black ocean,
With tides of diamonds flung across
its expanse.

We see light.
We see light in the darkness as I
taught you to see the rainbows in the
black;
I know where they hide.

We are not trapped by the sky’s
limits,
You told me,
But instead, we are protected by
them.

The stars know everything that’s
ever been
Because their days are spent
Watching our nights steal behind our
eyelids
As we sink into the
subconscious.

I look up,
Because I hear the stars whispering
to me.
Whispering with their glittering eyes.

The stars sing to me.
They comfort me with their burning
hearts
And they whisper,
“Hold on, just a little longer.
You’re going to be
ok.”

And

“Do you want to hear something
strange?” I whisper.

“I believe them.”

For we dream in stars
And we sing in constellations.

Slamming doors
banging doors
running about
the house
Yes, children make
noise.....but please
have some respect
For others ...
it's becoming quite
annoying .....
A habit every-time
it's the worst noise ever ......
Oh no not again
My head is beginning  to burst...
Please just make it stop!!!
I cant think .......
I long for just a little bit
of piece and quiet....
I shouldn't of opened my mouth

I think about your hands -
or what they'd look like, still, in a painting -
Do you still talk to me in your head?

We don't talk now,
our once tattered line has crumbled into silence.
And I miss how I could have missed you,
and I long to have longed for you -
I dream of all the daydreams
I could have wasted on your eyes.

All of this -
and now you are just silence
at the end
of a thought.

We are mere dreams in the illusion of life
Though the dreams may be different
They are just dreams in this weird illusion of life
While the dream may be magnificent
That too must end; just as a nightmare must,
For after all, we are mere dreams
That one day will certainly turn to dust
While the illusion of life or reality as it seems
Is just a transient illusion, we call our life
And when the dream goes bust
We awake to find we begin a new dream so nice
And that our illusion is what we deserved the best
So let us enjoy our dreams until we can, with spice
For after all, we are mere dreams in the illusion of life

Beaumaris
a carnival of tones
of damp evenings
of tramway cars
of small orange lights
distracted bystanders
empty bridges
dreamy horizons
Pale was the lace
white the cotton
dress and parasol
almost sepia
Dream of that particular Monet,
unseen
before the rains came

Many years later
I found her
so tenuous
in what little was left
yet there she was
all new shades
of melancholy

Now I just swim
every now and then
in that blue ocean
of her blueness,
the Sea of Oblivion
where no one coughs
where she lives, again,
forever
in the glimpse of
bright reflections of sunshine
on the water
of a country
where it never rains