For a month a part of me was missing.
At least I thought.
So when I found it again, I was overjoyed.
Life made sense again because a void was filled.
But everything that glitters isn't gold.

You can't miss a part of you that was never there.
There's not a word for it either.
I tried to conquer the lexiconical gap.
So I watched as the petals grew crisp
And his words lost tenderness.
I relived the feelings of before that were  the reason I left.
I questioned why I ever came back.

I watched myself and my movements.
Wondering why I did everything with him in mind.
Just wanting to be seen as imperfectly perfect,
Be any and everything.
To others I was everything and more,
To myself I tried to be more, to be that part he never could seem to find in me.
But yet again the lexiconical gap stopped.
I couldn't miss the part of me I never had
Especially because I never knew what it was.

Summer came and went.
Our summer was the sweetest.
I miss what I actually did have then.
Those constant conversations, that eagerness and anxiety we'd get when too many hours passed without seeing or hearing from each other.
We did have that.
Now summer comes again and I'm faced with the
everlasting gaps that are me waiting to hear from you.
That denial I have when I finally do.

A gap, the lexiconical gap that may never be filled.
Not even Lexi can fill it, not even Lexi can keep you.

The first time...I disgustingly recall.
Oh, it was sore and achy, overall
But the force was so weak
Left no nasty mark on my cheek
Although my mind was worn out and tired and bleak

I had said one too many words
He snapped, the sensation was all a blur
I looked up, tears in my eyes
"I deserved it" I silently decide
And waited for the choking memory to subside

Gray and hazy and spiteful and loud
"You lazy bastard, I hope you're fucking proud"
So I make an escape plan on my own tonight
I get stabbed when I muster strength to fight
Don't bother... I'm just an irrelevant plight.

My feet sludge through the mud,
my cheeks, red from the beating sun.
I don't know why I am in this desert,
thought it has rained here just days ago.

I was watching you through the rain
gazing, your eyes melt through mine.
Felt a cold touch in my heart...
It was the detachment from our souls,
they are finally joining to meet.
So long I have lost you,
now here we both stand.
It was here in the water,
in the desert sun,
I found you once again.

I beg the boiling sky,
I beg the now dry land,
to bring me back to him,
so our hands could clasp as well.
I don't know the days,
I barely know the time,
hours we have parted,
without ever saying goodbye.

But my eyes grow weak,
bleary and exhausted.
I long to close them, thinking of you...
we will meet again in the next life.
My love, I am so sure of it.

We will be here once again.

Sad thing about forgiveness,
There is always the past of shame.
Just beneath the surface,
you're the one to blame.

Sweet thing about love
you always want "return."
To be there once more willing,
the smile is not forlorn.

Tragedy strikes again.
No going back again.
No remorse, apology
it's far too late for that.

I really wish it didn't have to be this way,
I chose because you did too.
Cornered in the end again,
there's nothing left to do.

she's six years old,
and every morning
her mommy would sit in her room
and braid her hair for her.
she's six years old,
and her mommy and daddy
both got home before six,
and the family ate dinner together.
she's six years old,
and her mommy and daddy
still love to cuddle
before they fall asleep,
their limbs tangled together
like twisted tree branches.

she's twelve years old,
and she braids her own hair now,
her mom doesn't get out of bed
early enough anymore.
she's twelve years old,
and she eats dinner alone in her room,
only to lean against the door
to listen to her parents fight.
she's twelve years old,
and her parents sleep on opposite
sides of the bed.

she's fifteen years old,
and she leaves her hair down
so it will hide her face.
she's fifteen years old,
and her parents rarely come home
before nine.
she's fifteen years old,
and she doesn't eat dinner anymore,
squeezing at the chub in her cheeks
and on her stomach,
the nonexistent gap between her thighs.

she's seventeen years old,
and she doesn't know where her father went.
all she knows
is she hasn't seen him since her birthday
last year.
her mother rarely works.
her hair's even longer.
she barely remembers
what dinner is,
and sometimes
she just gets
very,
very
tired.
she's seventeen years old,
and she's completely certain
that life
is too exhausting
for her to go through.
she's seventeen years old,
and she's ready to give up
and make it easy for herself
once more.

Look only into my eyes when we make love
for if your glance should stumble elsewhere
you will see not me but my deformities,
the misshapen amalgam that is me without you.

In loving you,
you’ve rendered me perfect,
whole,
rectified,
an unblemished Adonis
to your Dawn.

Your eyes need never stray beyond mine,
for in their rheumy orbs you shall behold
the Big Bang of creation,
the sensuous dance of Shiva,
the birth of humanity,
the awakening of consciousness.

Just look in my eyes and
I promise
you will behold
the universe entire,
with you at its center.

Monty Python's The Meaning of Life
The Galaxy Song

Just remember that you're standing on a planet that's evolving
And revolving at nine hundred miles an hour,
That's orbiting at nineteen miles a second, so it's reckoned,
A sun that is the source of all our power.
The sun and you and me and all the stars that we can see
Are moving at a million miles a day
In an outer spiral arm, at forty thousand miles an hour,
Of the galaxy we call the 'Milky Way'.
Our galaxy itself contains a hundred billion stars.
It's a hundred thousand light years side to side.
It bulges in the middle, sixteen thousand light years thick,
But out by us, it's just three thousand light years wide.
We're thirty thousand light years from galactic central point.
We go 'round every two hundred million years,
And our galaxy is only one of millions of billions
In this amazing and expanding universe.

The universe itself keeps on expanding and expanding
In all of the directions it can whizz
As fast as it can go, at the speed of light, you know,
Twelve million miles a minute, and that's the fastest speed there is.
So remember, when you're feeling very small and insecure,
How amazingly unlikely is your birth,
And pray that there's intelligent life somewhere up in space,
'Cause there's bugger all down here on Earth.

Alright,I need to temporarily change my username and delete my poem "I Drew A Picture". I'll re-post it later. Just wanted to say,because I though it would be weird if I suddenly changed my name without notice...so,yeah,just wanted to say

Deep breath,
One, two, three.
Deep breath,
One, two, three.
Steep depth
Burying me.
Dark far as
Eyes can see,
Deep breath,
One, two, three.
Be scared,
It's okay,
We'll find
Another way
Just need the
Light of day.
Deep breath,
One, two, three.
Keep up the
Steady climb,
We're not too
Far behind,
Wipe off the
Mud that blinds,
Show me your
Eyes that shine.
Look there.
I see the sun.
It's okay
To be stunned,
Deep breath,
It's almost done.
Get up in
Three, two,
One.