You shop in Hollister,
a store targeted to popular teens,
but I stop by Hot Topic
made for fangirls, nerds, and scenes.
Inside of Hollister it is dark,
and you can't see what you're buying,
an overwhelming aroma of cologne and perfume
will make my eyes start crying.
The store is built to look like
it belongs in California-
and every piece of clothing
(and here is logic for ya)-
every piece is decorated
with surf boards and gulls and bikinis
cos everyone apparently forgot
where we live it's only 60 degrees.
The bags you take out with you
are covered with pictures of teens
with sagging bottoms and rippling muscles
and fake tans and bikinis obscene.
They play bad music
at a super fast pace,
and the girls inside
act like they own the place.
Now Hot Topic is a different story,
I feel that I must mention,
almost like an escape for losers,
a We Love Nerds convention.
Here you can get a size
that is bigger than zero,
and instead of cool surfboards
are screened with bacon and superheroes.
T-Shirts and suspenders
ties, belts, and wristbands,
with smart-aleck sayings
and merchandise for fans
of just about every
like Hetalia, Doctor Who,
or even just random
things like bacon or
My Little Pony,
(I'm getting a wristband that says
"I'm a Brony")
Funny little quotes
on buttons and pins,
on little odds'n'ends.
They people inside
are hipsters through and through
with hanging-off-the-frame Beatles shirts
MissMayI, Doctor Who.
This is where I feel safest,
among a million people like me,
instead of that stupid Hollister store
filled up with people I have no desire to be.
You come home late in your short skirt
Your such a flirt, that's what really hurt
I pretend to be asleep as you enter
You see; At this game I'm a beginer
In my universe you've become the center
I'm never sure what to say or do
when I get the blues
So I act a fool
Under your breath you start to giggle
You crawl in bed and start to wiggle
My emotions get so fickled
Inside I start to cringe
Cause you need to make amends
Fast to sleep I still pretend
Yet I guess you have your plan
And it's all that I can stand
When you whisper "Your my man!"
Don't wake me from this dream
It's not a bad dream
hell I don't know what it mean
First I start to waste away
Then you feel the need to play
Perhaps I'll figure life out someday...
That you are growing up,
That you are not just a girl any more,
That you need different newer type of clothes.
You are becoming a beautiful young woman,
You will see that she is more strict,
You must remain polite.
For she loves you inside,
For she was a girl too just like you,
For she knows today's times aren't safe enough.
She wants to keep your young womanhood safe,
She will impose more restrictions,
She will want your safety.
You would wonder that why I tell you this stuff,
You will realize as the time elapses,
You'll always be protected.
Today it's your life's test,
Today how well you treat your mom,
Today is paid-off tomorrow by the Fruit of Karma.
You will be happier.
She will be happier.
She will trust you.
My HP Poem #315
Rob had an oak tree face, eyes a meld
of gray and sky-before-a-rain-storm
sort of blue, burlap sack jowls
shook when he hacked up his lungs
like Betty's droopy mouth--the 16 year-old hound
who never left my neighbor's front porch
"Bernie, Bernie, my, my Bernie," Ack Ack Ahem
"Phew 'scuse me!"
"That's alright," I said
"Bernie, when I first came here I tell ya people
ask me the color of the walls, I'd tell 'em cancer, the
floors tiled with cancer, ceiling lamps glowing
fluorescent cancer, the mural you see when you first
come in--in it I saw the dad, the mom with cancer, the
little boy in his sailor suit had cancer, there was cancer
down his fishing line, in the water, and inside the fish
he'd catch and eat, the young girl had cancer and she
blew cancerous tunes out her cancer flute, the cafe
food tasted like cancer, the spinach, the mashed
potatoes, the steak, those tiny apple juice cups they
give you...but it all comes back, you'll see..."
Carl was wheeled in, asleep, with wires and tubes
up and down his arms
"Why Carl looks like a 73 year-old bionic man!
He's gonna interfere with the radio frequency,
we won't be able to hear the ball game anymore!"
Carl swatted at Rob, still half asleep
"Now what was I sayin'?"
"How's your dinner tonight, Rob?" I asked
"Oh! Five-star Bernie, Linda dropped off a whole
pot roast, sweet potato fries, and peas under cooked
just the way I like 'em."
"That was very nice of her."
I took a bite of mine--
cancer, with a hint of romesco
The eyes snap open,
Like the shutter on a camera,
Pupils fixed and tracking,
Watching every move,
Pinholes peering into the depths of you,
Leering at your mind,
Keeping record of your every move,
Knowing your thoughts,
Knowing what it thinks to be 'you'
A total surprise,
'no one can tell, right?'
It's like beauty,
Obvious to some,
Invisible to others,
I know ,if you know, and dread these dreams,
I own nothing
I live in house that's not mine
A house I don't own
Inside are clothes
Clothes that I wear sometimes
When I need to put something on.
Where I sleep is the floor
A blanket rolled beside me
To keep me from the cold.
That One Lost Love
Have you ever had that one lost love
That you remember from your past
The one who seemed to get away
But you wish you could have back
The timing wasn't perfect
For the love you had back then
Their broken heart not ready
So now they call you friend
Every now and then you speak
You hear the story of their life
They tell you that they fell in love
You feel an emptyness inside
You wish that they had felt this way
For the love you shared back then
For how can they have fell in love
When you have this love within
The future holds a different path
Then what we think we know
You cannot change the way they feel
You must let the friendship grow
So no matter what the future holds
Just know that love is true
For this friendship with a broken heart
Is the friendship I have with you
Carl Joseph Roberts
My life to me seems a movie
In which I play a part
Not an award winner by any means
The film, some may call it art
It does have a bit of adventure
Some comedy with rhyme
Also it's had it's share of drama
That I myself consider a crime
I've also starred in other peoples movies
In some, bit parts are all I've played
More times though I've been a stand in
With nothing much to say
If you've seen the way I act at times
I'm clearly not a leading man
And as far as romantic movies go
That's just not who it is I am
If I take the time to think about
Comedy is what I do best
If you ask my friends and family though
What I consider funny should stay inside my head
Because once it goes into production
And acted out in scene
It's not quite as humorous as first thought
The moment it hits the big screen
So although my life...the movie
Has had its share of flops
I'll continue on with my acting
Until the movie play reel stops
Walking into the room full of quiet minds all sitting in common posture,
In the open corner I meet you lying down in your own comfort reading!
So I acknowledge your difference by complimenting you to celebrate!
Beginning our conversation was limited do to life differences, however;
We did not let it stop us for we saw Light and grabbed the hope inside of it!
In a second we connected, In a minute we established, In an hour we experienced,
Honest True Friendship!!!
There have been many Hugs, conversations, expressions, discoveries, challenges, boundaries, limits, with an endless number of more breath taking experiences that only we have together!
Through every Breath taken together in our friendship so far we both can only look ahead with
For our future is untold but our Hope is Alive together Forevermore!!!
Look to the past to find your demons
Ghosts appear as memories loom,
Transgressions weave uneasy feelings
The horrors glide across the room.
Tissue scarred for wrongs committed
Hot, wet tears run down your face,
Embarrassed feelings bleed discomfort
Bad reflections have no grace.
A writhing in your nether regions
Bleak remorsefulness inside,
Feelings based on actions rendered
Face your demons, run and hide.
Overwhelming sinful actions
Drive you to a freezing place,
Confess your crimes to Catholic faction
Bare your shredded soul’s disgrace.
9 May 2009
- From "Watching the Ripples Radiate"