as with good red wine
life is best only half full
we need room to breathe
"It is just a stupid and suicidal world, Tumblr is."
"All it does is provoke those negative feelings."
"What doe it do for you? Obviously nothing good."
...afternoon tea with friends
...as good times lend a hand
...princess on parade
...daddy's favorite name
...in the make believe
...reality at bay
...the innocence of dreams
What a small weight for the most important gas,
that is keeping us alive.
I was 16 when I realized that my mom
had forever been my biggest supporter.
I was 16 and I was still holding my fingers crossed behind my back,
hoping that Santa was real.
I'm the hidden meaning behind good reasons
that have paved the way toward bad choices.
For I have realized, sitting silently in the corner,
that we are all forced to realize our
own self destruction.
Like the building and the wrecking ball,
of which I am often both.
I am your overspoken words and unsaid thoughts.
I am not the beautiful bare trees in the winter,
but instead I am your poisonous dinner.
I am the passion behind tears
and the emotion behind screams.
I am the thoughts that keep you up at night,
and your cold, bare feet.
I resemble a constant string of avoidance and indecisiveness.
I am your dewy eyes and groggy voice at 7:30 in the morning.
I am nothing but a blinking statue.
I am 16 years worth of unanswered questions.
Yet in 16 years will all I be is
another 16 years older?
I am the epitome of drowning without water,
and not to spoil the ending for you,
but I still have 16 years worth of faith,
that everything will be okay.
Another one got caught today, it's all over the papers. "Teenager Arrested in Computer Crime Scandal", "Hacker Arrested after Bank Tampering"...
Damn kids. They're all alike.
But did you, in your three-piece psychology and 1950's technobrain, ever take a look behind the eyes of the hacker? Did you ever wonder what made him tick, what forces shaped him, what may have molded him?
I am a hacker, enter my world...
Mine is a world that begins with school... I'm smarter than most of the other kids, this crap they teach us bores me...
Damn underachiever. They're all alike.
I'm in junior high or high school. I've listened to teachers explain for the fifteenth time how to reduce a fraction. I understand it. "No, Ms. Smith, I didn't show my work. I did it in my head..."
Damn kid. Probably copied it. They're all alike.
I made a discovery today. I found a computer. Wait a second, this is cool. It does what I want it to. If it makes a mistake, it's because I screwed it up. Not because it doesn't like me... Or feels threatened by me.. Or thinks I'm a smart ass.. Or doesn't like teaching and shouldn't be here...
Damn kid. All he does is play games. They're all alike.
And then it happened... a door opened to a world... rushing through the phone line like heroin through an addict's veins, an electronic pulse is sent out, a refuge from the day-to-day incompetencies is sought... a board is found. "This is it... this is where I belong..." I know everyone here... even if I've never met them, never talked to them, may never hear from them again... I know you all...
Damn kid. Tying up the phone line again. They're all alike...
You bet your ass we're all alike... we've been spoon-fed baby food at school when we hungered for steak... the bits of meat that you did let slip through were pre-chewed and tasteless. We've been dominated by sadists, or ignored by the apathetic. The few that had something to teach found us willing pupils, but those few are like drops of water in the desert.
This is our world now... the world of the electron and the switch, the beauty of the baud. We make use of a service already existing without paying for what could be dirt-cheap if it wasn't run by profiteering gluttons, and you call us criminals. We explore... and you call us criminals. We seek after knowledge... and you call us criminals. We exist without skin color, without nationality, without religious bias... and you call us criminals. You build atomic bombs, you wage wars, you murder, cheat, and lie to us and try to make us believe it's for our own good, yet we're the criminals.
Yes, I am a criminal. My crime is that of curiosity. My crime is that of judging people by what they say and think, not what they look like. My crime is that of outsmarting you, something that you will never forgive me for.
I am a hacker, and this is my manifesto. You may stop this individual, but you can't stop us all... after all, we're all alike.
Written January 8, 1986
The moon is on the rise
All the stars have filled the skies
But the wolf ignored your cries
Messages get lost sometimes
But on his evening meal he dines
Then he's gnawing on the rinds
They say that good things come in nines
And even lows will have their highs
For the eagle in the skies
Questions not what fate decides
And though the fox wears a disguise
You must not care to hear his lies
Though you think, he never tries
He's sucking eggs while he confides
And you've already heard his lines
You know you're leaving just in time
Deep in your eyes, my heart still lies
Forever changing with the tides
For every story has two sides
But who is it who will decide?
my journal consists of:
crumpled up to-do lists
names written in cursive
you know that.
but what you don't know is that
it consists of:
tears from crying over you
laughter over all the good times we've had
dirty jokes because they mean more to me than you think
poetry about the way you make my lips quiver
song lyrics about how many times i've fell for you
death because i know i'll never win your heart
comics of how we'd become a couple
drawings of how beautiful you are
love (silly you, always knowing the way to my heart)
flowers because you smell like fresh ones
nail polish reminds me of the time i did your nails and i broke a glass vase somehow
music because you taught me the importance of it
crumpled up to-do lists because you always seemed to be on the top
love letters that i'll never show you
names written in cursive (obviously yours)
photos of us that will forever remain in my heart
thoughts about you;
you're always on my mind and
i can't get you out.
Okey, I understand
I’m not the most attractive person,
and my reserved personality
which would rather listen than to
be the center of attention.
I see the good and in some way
I fall in love with everyone around me
I’ll love the way you smile
or how you talk with such passion
about the things that bring you happiness .
I’ll admire your tears, hurt
and what you show me
that are concealed from others
I love you in one way or the other.
With Good Business brewed is Good Business told
Confirmed the New Mentor who taught us well
Such swig a Sterling Medicine behold
But knowing our Skills his Avid Trust spell
Forsought this Blue Trade our Clients rely
Was that our Webbed Gifts can reciprocate
That within those Months our Service apply
To increase the Bank's volume aggregate
Such now our Eagle wears; Tri-Coloured Schemes
Weaved in pleats forth to Genious unique
And if we can prove to maintain those Seams
Will he be Proud of our Learning oblique.
Once that's done, to the Pub he tips his Zest
All the more content our Minds would not guess.
Ha, have you met me?
You going to make me cry! :'D
Are you in need of glasses? Because I know a good doctor who can prescribe you a pair.
Ok this is where I draw the line.
I need to tell you about who I really am...
Let's go where no one can hear us.
This is going to freak you out.
Ha! Perfect, you are sooooo off.