When he was away
I sent him picture messages
Of me holding signs
He was the only one for me.
That our love was endless.
That one day, we’d have the house, the dog, the stocked wine fridge.
And I doubted it was true
Even as I wrote them.
But it was the fantasy to believe in
That he and I,
Two world-class fuck ups
In our own rights
Fuck this one up.
What once was joy and laughter
And holding hands on public streets
And feeling validated from when he would call me sexy
Lying on bedroom floors
Sobbing to the carpet
Heaving for breath
Wondering how it ever came to this.
I love to hate him.
The scars you see
Are ones he gave me
As I experienced the worst of
We allowed ourselves disillusion
When reality became too tough
When hands that were holding
Felt like squeezing
When air we were breathing
When love we were feeling
I thought about all those signs today
Those signs I put in the “his” box
That he collected when I wasn’t there
Because I didn’t want to see him
And I wonder what he did with them.
If he threw them away
Like he did with us
Or if he has them still
And wants to be reminded
That he still fucks everything up.
Sometimes life presents challenges,
which at the time may seem small,
but instead, appear insurmountable.
Finding true love is one of the hardest
tasks that humankind, as a whole, faces.
Many see love as pure fantasy,
reciprocal, requited, and unconditional,
as true love is meant to be.
This kind of love brings contentment,
and internal peace, which can be unlike
any euphoria you have ever felt.
This love intoxicates and exhilarates.
It will lift you higher
than the tallest mountain,
and make you feel fuller
than the deepest ocean.
This love will make you feel whole,
and complete, with the
joining together of two lost,
lonely souls, once wondering adrift.
in an union that fulfills.
But, for a select few, this ideal of fantasy is
more of a reality filled with heartache.
That same reality can bring us to our knees,
and the pain alone can smother us,
to the point of not being able to breathe.
Then comes the constant cycle of hurt,
emptiness, and anger, which draws us back
to the source which has caused such emotion.
It leaves us begging for the pain to stop;
sometimes making us yearn, to once again, be with
the one who has caused us to feel such turmoil.
It is an addiction unlike any other,
caused by the fear of being alone
and starting anew.
We now find ourselves
sacrificing our own self,
to maintain a sense of familiarity and safeness.
Not realizing, but instead blinded by memories,
that this reality is showing us that it
was just not meant to be.
It takes time to mend a broken heart;
time on our own, to discover our true self-worth;
time to realize that love will find us again.
We will encounter a struggle, unlike another,
to overcome our fears of distrust and vulnerability.
Many lessons will be learnt, along the way.
But, with strength and perseverance,
all of the time spent healing,
will open our heart to a brand new beginning, one day.
First, we must realize, that deep within our own self
lies the ashes of our once brilliantly burning heart.
Only with time, will our pain become manageable.
Yet, we will always wear
the scars of a love gone bad,
as an embattled soldier wears his own, from a war lost.
But, choosing to not allow this to consume oneself,
is a true challenge, in itself.
In the end, deciding when we have had enough,
is what will allow the reopening of our heart.
We must learn, to not allow the pain to truly hide
the one thing that lies right in front of us – opportunity.
Sometimes this opportunity,
is a new love, that is more fitting than the last.
A new love, one that will ease
the loneliness that
envelopes us like a blanket;
a new start with someone who can
love, respect, cherish,
and adore us,
more than any ghost of our past.
We all have the power to turn
our reality into fantasy.
However, never lose sight,
that even true love is not perfect,
and neither are we.
We all make mistakes; we will disappoint.
Not all of us will possess the means, or desire,
to hurt another on purpose.
It is the search for a soul, that mirrors our own,
which will be the hardest struggle.
This struggle can be won with one true fact -
not all people are alike.
Once we open our mind, and our heart, to this,
all fears and inhibitions will melt away,
as the sun melts the snow, in early Spring.
With this sign of rebirth,
our new love will be unlike
all we have experienced before.
But, we must never allow our past
to dictate our present,
which will ultimately decide our future.
We must find that power within ourselves,
to overcome the reality,
by embracing, and enjoying,
the new adventure, and path,
we are about to undertake.
Vicki A. Zinn
Do you want to live forever?
said the Gardener to me,
tending to a creeping thought
and watering the sea.
I replied, no, but thanks, you see,
I'd rather be a tree.
And spread my branches out
shelter creatures underneath.
A tree? A tree? He whispered tentatively.
Why, I can't remember what it be.
That word. That thought. That memory.
He shook his head and shrugged at me.
(So, I scratched a crude drawing in the dirt
and The Gardener squatted there, pondering at it a while.
His robes lifted up above his bony knees)
But I do that too, said He, jumping up quite suddenly.
Pardon me, but I just don't see the need.
The need to be a tree!
Just beg a princely role of me
and I'll fulfill your fantasy.
I said thanks..but.. well, you see,
I'd rather be a tree.
He paused for quite a while.
Then said okay, a little hesitantly.
Then said, that he would not be that okay
until he sees these silly things called trees,
and until he sees the purpose of the thing it is
that means so wonderfully much to me
want to be a tree.
So he turned me to a tree and put me in a park.
Where couples came and families
and cuddling lovers in the dark.
And colored birds were friends to me
and I sheltered all of them beneath.
And spread new life through little seeds
and quenched the world its need to breathe.
And in the autumn dropped my leaves
to feed the insects in the weeds.
I stretched my roots in
luscious ground and saw such beauty all around.
old and happy as only a tree
could ever wish or hope
And then I saw that a familiar face was watching me.
And He said..
You are quite naturally a tree
and have done so extraordinarily well in green that I will let you be to live your dream.
And as he walked away,
he smiled happily back at me.
Dreams are a tapestry of beauty and adventure
You never know where you'll be
You'll never know what the landscape looks like
Until you dream your dreams
I really love dreams and illusions
For they are beautiful
Sometimes they're musical
Sometimes they're a fantasy
And sometimes they're a symphony
I love dreams
They're always beautiful
They're so lovely
I love dreams, don't you?
What's behind those brown mystic eyes
Even the blind could see the sparkling light
What is this feeling? Hey! Tell me.
Touch me, sway me in the dark
Sweet whispers, I can feel your breathe in my ears
Hold me close, say the words I want to hear
Is this a dream? Don't wake me.
Let's not end the night
You keep me high with your kiss
This adrenaline hiss
Let me feel you, the love
Keep it burning
'Coz no one could stop us tonight
Wild hearts playing lover's game
I feel you within me and now I'm yours
Our hearts beat as one, I feel the rush
This night will last forever
Don't you know you're my fantasy
You're kiss is my wine, as our skin touches
Dizzy, an over dose of your caress
Playing in the dark,
Listening to the rhythm of our hearts
And now the night starts to end
Like the stars who leave the moon at dawn
Will you say goodbye?
When morning comes, will I be alone sleeping?
I'm yours but you aren't mine
But in the night, I'll be waiting
Because the night is ours
Tonight is ours
I wanted a pen
to write my dreams
to silence my screams
to dwell in imaginations den
I looked at the sky
head in the clouds
asked out loud
a plaintive cry
I forgot my request
got on with life
lived through strife
survived the test
I entered a contest for fun
drew a quick sketch
third prize I fetched
oh my, a sky pen, I won
I took it as a sign
to rekindle my fire
this victory inspired
me to pen a line
I’ve found a lost love
a forgotten joy
a much adored toy
a gift from above
It fulfills a need
feeds the soul
makes me whole
I’ve planted a seed
It grows and grows
can take over
I’ll never recover
from poems I sow
I’m soaring, floating
following my pen
escaping reality again
sweetly, softly, drifting
My wings are stretched
I’m travelling worldwide
nothing can hide
nothing’s too far-fetched
Dilly-dallying my day away
strolling down fantasy lane
with my pen I’m playing
brain and hand gone astray
Am I like Dumbo with his feather?
Can I pen without this pen?
if it broke, what then?
Could I even write a letter?
Firing words from pen
shooting from the hip
no risk of punch in lip
safely hidden in my den
Writing stops many a row
it’s a release
iron’s out many a crease
to it’s power I bow
Freedom is anonymity
let emotions speak
coming out, not for the weak
it brings accountability
My pen has the loudest voice
speaks over my own
doesn’t need a microphone
to listen, I’ve no choice
On day’s pen’s not working
I await listlessly
eyeing it continuously
ideas, hovering, lurking
This pen is now an obsession
an all consuming need
I’m overcome with greed
interrupting can cause agression
My time is no longer my time
it’s now ruled by pen
I’m let of now and then
but frequently called back to rhyme
I’m skimming the stars
wish I could traverse on Mars
On make-believe’s loom I weave
today I want to celebrate
pen and I co-operate
it’s absence I’d grieve
I’m living in cloud cuckoo land
this writing lark is easy
and never makes me queasy
everything, today, is grand
Pen has a quirky way of being
some days very liberal
wouldn’t want to take it literal
problems invisible, I’m not seeing
Today pen writes in language of love
expressing itself from the heart
roses and kindness it imparts
fits me snug, like a glove
Whispering sweet nothings in my ear
making me write all twee
writing cute and pretty
causing my dog to leer
Your like a pringle
once I pop, I can’t stop
you make my feet bop
my senses all a tingle
I’m your willing slave
marvelling in your ways
writing in a blissful daze
your company I crave
Now your just being rude
everything you write is naughty
getting me all prim and haughty
I’ll have to work on your attitude
I need to go to sleep
rest my weary head
your inkwell, your bed
don’t want to hear you, not a peep
had to include the words sky and pen together and be at least 500 words never written anything so long
a fun challenge
didn't get anywhere lol x
I remember the day I met you.
You looked gorgeous in that black, long dress.
Your short, brown hair dancing with the wind.
Your white, hypnotic smile paralyzing me.
To be honest, I had met you before, in photographs.
I was under your spell since then,
but that night turned my fantasy into reality.
So we talked, we drank, we danced.
I couldn't get my eyes off of you.
We met again a couple days after that.
I waited for you.
I was only waiting for you.
The sand, the ocean, the bright, blue sky.
They were all there to whitness my heart racing
every time I looked at you.
So I build up some courage, and go for it.
I ask you on a date.
Nothing too fancy. Just a movie with me.
Movie was awful, but I didn't care.
I had spent that time with you.
What more could I ask for?
Sadly, time to go home came too soon.
You were picked up, and offered to drop me off at my place.
I kissed you, in the cheek.
You didn't complain.
I smiled beneath a smile.
Once I said goodbye, and crossed the door I jumped,
I almost even cry of the joy.
I couldn't have been happier.
I couldn't feel any better.
I remember how much in love I was with you.
We lay together lost in fantasy
Restless gazing upon different ceilings
Giggling in the remembrance of word plays through long days
Where we still manage to provoke smiles in the midst of our dull lonely ways
Your voice vibrates through a long distanced line
that we both dream of crossing some time
And though time may be a troubling thing
we push on with love and curiosity
Your voice rings sweet melodies to my imaginative tendencies
Damn this longing
It's time you cross over and claim your belongings
A Key hangs around my neck
On a pink ribbon
'Tis my Key to Wonderland
Whenever I wish to escape
To my own little world
I am free to go
Books and novels,
Fantasy and dreams,
As well as writing
Is my Key
Whenever I wish to go
And dream of different things
My imagination runs wild
Pen to paper
Describes what I see
Either in pictures or in my imagination
'Tis my Wonderland and my world
I love dreams and thoughts
Hopes and wishes
For they all are different Keys
Each one takes you where
You want to go
In your imagination
Or in pictures
'Tis my Key to Wonderland
And it stays around my neck
Castles way up in the clouds
Of the majestic sky,
Up near rainbows,
Doves and horses gladly accepting their freedom
Fairies with their magical wands,
Gnomes sitting under trees,
Elves roaming Fairyland,
Dream worlds full of illusions,
Mirrors reflecting a girl or boy on the other side,
Swans floating upon lakes with their mate,
Oceans with their beauty of eternity,
Wells waiting for wishes to be made
Or coins to be tossed down them,
Never ending paths waiting for travelers,
Halls that go on forever,
Day dreams and childhood wishes,
Enchanted Cottages of beauty,
Pristine forests where Fairies live and dwell,
Waltzing flowers on a lone hill,
Forgotten treasures under the ocean,
Lone vast deserts,
Dew-drops on sun-kissed flowers,
This is my world of fantasy, dreams,
Illusions and imagination.