I gave you permission to hold my heart
You held it in the palm of your hands
Promised not to break it apart
It was a risk and I took the chance
Soon it was clear that you were the one
I felt like my heart had won
the winning prize
But soon it was clear
That he fooled my eyes
with filthy lies
and broken promises

This man had my happiness
in the palm of his hands
He knew that I was weak
so he used it to his advantage
as I loosened my defence

His mouth talked rubbish
but his body meant business
I can tell by the way he said my name
as we walked during our dates

He was a liar but honest about his past
Gave you a one-way ticket to paradise
made you weak as you fell for the eyes
who ultimately deceived you not once
but oh so many wicked times

Whispers dancing
in between
thoughts and feelings
pushing and weaving
thin threads
through out my mind.
Images peaking
into the corners
of my eyes
my memory
making me
question if
anything is
real anymore.
When will there
be a middle ground
from sociopath
to emotionally
overloaded?
When will
overwhelming
anxiety stop
and human
interaction start?
Will i ever be
fully honest
with anyone
without the
fear of rejection
for a chemical
imperfection?
Or will living
be an elaborate
lie to keep
anyone and everyone
away from
the truth
of insanity?

Whispering her smile
Looking beatific,
Looking arousingly terrific,
Uninvited but invitingly,
Place my pointer finger
Upon her breast, nipples already attentive,
Erect,  she preps to dance and to
Leave me

Bid her despedida,
For my adieu is tinged
With desperation internal raging,
For tantalizing, J'accuse,
Guilty as charged

My tango muse,
Off to dance in dives,
Where all the men are
Strangers, who paid in cash,
With creased and stained $20 bills,
To soil themselves, to dance with my woman,
Paid far in advance.

For consorting with the enemy,
I renounce her not, but guilty charged,
For mesmerizing, J'accuse,
Guilty as charged

She'll return, after three,
Undress before me,
Purportedly sleeping,
Pointedly, slowly, knowingly,
To insure I scent the sweat
That tango demands,
The sexual side effects,
The Argentines invented,
Accoutrement rituals,
Excuses to invent dance,
In order to pleasure intensity,
For teasing w/o mercy, J'accuse,
Guilty as charged

She chambers her body bullet,
Sliding in unrobed,
For a negligee would be
Negligent in her condition,
Laughing at my pretend closed eyes,
She whispers,:

I return here, to you
For one reason alone
Despite soul and body, exhilarated,
While gone, you have been composing
About me without permission,
Of  this, of thee,
J'accuse!

I know you have penned
Poem,
Which long after the dance thrill has chilled,
Will belong to me forever,
I will kiss you now so I may taste the
Words  that are mine, until next week,
When I will be guilty again
Of charging your imagination

Those words were haunting my skull last night;
Carved inside chambers of wild delight.
And the handles
of the candles
in the caves of the fight,
Were full of decay
And the tales of the pulpit.

How many wine stains does it take to appease
These spirits and wanderers with whom you
Traffic with ease?

Dark concepts in the fringes and the hinges
of the sepulchres of your eyes.

I hope you gaze  
Over, over breakfast
Tired mind in overcast, morning haze
It's raining in June
When your eyes attain their loving glaze

They could catch your smile
With a cardboard box, and a stick
Dopey, painted on your face a while
You're looking over what I wrote last night
For that smile,  I would limp every mile

This morning you begin to read my musing
English Muffin and Orange Juice
Is poetic perusing the least bit amusing?
Graft script, sweet nothings onto yourself
In conviction I made you my choosing

The skeletons
I buried out back with a rusty shovel
claw each other
to climb out of the earth;
left there from days gone past
they fight to live again.

The dwarfed squat bones
of whims that died in conception
climb the bigger ones-
the ones that walked in the light
and those climb those bigger still,
and in the center...

an imposing mass,
lies the biggest of them all.
the only one
too big to move,
fed by shame and loved too long;
it was a giant at it’s death,
and has nothing he can climb.
His hand’s outstretched
to grasp for life
finds only the soft brown dirt
that keeps him in the ground.
All the other little fears
climb up him,
as their ladder to blue skies.

But I slew my monsters long ago
their souls no longer rise.
All that’s left is memories,
to haunt my weary eyes
as they climb upon
their ladder to blue skies.

How long has it been
since your black tourmaline eyes
met mine, a long-forgotten coal
all burnt and dead of its use;
very much like the owner.

How long has it been
since your ice cold touch
sear at my hot as hell skin
against each other, so imperfect
yet we are of no danger to each other.

How long as it been
since the murmur of your melodic voice
entwined with my out-of-place tune
be it bickering
or a symphony played on the organ
haunting, yet soothing
as we will always go together.

How long has it been
since the silent treatments that will
usually end with an "I love you"
and the ear-splitting shatter of glass,
screaming anger that whispers "I love you"
wind their way across our lives?

Far too long, far too long.